American Splendor Page #5

ANGLE ON CHECK-OUT COUNTERS:

There are three lines to choose from. Two of the counters

have long waits. The third is much shorter but there is an

OLD JEWISH LADY next in line.

SUDDENLY, THE SCREEN SPLITS IN TWO:

The LEFT SIDE OF THE FRAME remains Harvey at the supermarket

deliberating over the check-out lines.

However, the RIGHT SIDE OF THE FRAME now contains a CRUMB

STYLE COMIC PANEL DEPICTING THE EXACT SAME SCENARIO. A

BUBBLE appears over CARTOON HARVEY’S head revealing his

thoughts. It reads: “Pickin’ the right check-out line is an

art...There’s a lot of things you gotta consider.”

ON THE LEFT SIDE OF THE FRAME... Harvey decides to get behind

the Old Lady.

MEANWHILE ON THE RIGHT HAND SIDE OF THE FRAME... Cartoon

Harvey stands behind the Old Lady.

A new BUBBLE reads: “It may be the shortest line but I am

takin’ a chance ‘cause she’s an Old Jewish Lady.”

.

BACK TO THE LEFT SIDE OF THE FRAME... The CASHIER rings up

the Old Lady’s purchases -- a few kitchen glasses.

24.

OLD JEWISH LADY:

(Yiddish Accent)

Listen, goily, dese glasses are six

for $2.00 because I couldn’t carry

twelf... But I vanted twelf so

today I’m buying six more... But

you should only charge me $1.50 for

dem... It’s ok, you can esk de

meneger.

Harvey rolls his eyes and stamps his foot impatiently. He

knows he’s in trouble now.

CASHIER:

(yelling)

Frank! I need a price check.

SUDDENLY, THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE SCREEN BECOMES FULLY

ANIMATED... Instead of still comic panels with balloons, the

Cartoon Harvey now rants directly into the camera.

CARTOON HARVEY:

Man, Old Jewish Ladies will argue

forever with a cashier about

anything. Get behind them in a

line an’ yer gonna wait forever!

The Human Harvey seems oblivious to his cartoon replica. He

impatiently leans on his cart, waiting and seething.

CARTOON HARVEY (cont’d)

I mean, I’m a yid myself, an’ the

women in my family are like that...

But I never got used to it... I may

be cheap, but I got limits!

ON THE LEFT HAND SIDE OF THE SCREEN... The MANAGER finally

arrives. The Old Lady haggles with him, too.

OLD JEWISH LADY:

Please. Let me ‘splain von more

time.

MEANWHILE ON THE RIGHT HAND SIDE... The Cartoon Harvey turns

to address the Human Harvey, who actually looks him in the

eyes. It now seems Human Harvey can actually hear his

cartoon alter ego.

CARTOON HARVEY:

Wake up! You’re whole life’s

gettin’ eaten away by this kinda

crap! What kind of existence is

this?

25.

CARTOON HARVEY(cont'd)

Is this all a workin’ stiff like

you can expect? Ya gonna suffer in

silence fer the rest a’ yer life?!

Or ya gonna make a mark. Huh?

Huh?

IN AN INSTANT, THE CARTOON HARVEY DISAPPEARS AND THE LIVE

ACTION SCENE TAKES OVER THE WHOLE FRAME.

Suddenly motivated by an odd notion, Harvey abandons his

grocery cart and runs out of the supermarket.

CUT TO:

INT. HARVEY’S KITCHEN -- NIGHT

Bursting with ideas, Harvey (wearing his undershirt and

boxers) starts story-boarding his first comic with stick

figures.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. HARVEY’S KITCHEN - 1975 - MORNING

A bleary-eyed HARVEY, still clad in an undershirt and boxers,

dozes off over a bowl of Corn Flakes. On the table next to

some spilled milk are a stack of papers covered with

scribbling. He clearly has been slaving over this work all

night.

ANGLE ON PAPERS:

At the top is a quickly scribbled title, “Standing Behind Old

Jewish Ladies In Supermarket Lines.”

These are ad hoc versions of a comic book. The pages are

divided like a tick-tack-toe board. Each square is filled

with crude stick figure drawings and lots of writing.

An alarm clock goes off. Harvey’s eyes fly open.

HARVEY:

Sh*t. Work.

Harvey yawns, then notices the pile of papers. He peruses

them, proud of his work. He gets up and looks out the

window.

26.

I/E. HARVEY’S APARTMENT - HARVEY’S POV - 1975 - MORNING

It is yet another grey day in Cleveland. The neighborhood is

run-down. Garbage is strewn everywhere.

The following scene unfolds through the window:

Two UNSIGHTLY WORKERS lug an old, smelly mattress from a

garage towards the garbage cans on the curb. Their

conversation is distant, but entirely audible.

MATTRESS GUY #1

So how smart is she?

MATTRESS GUY #2

I dunno. I guess she’s about

average.

MATTRESS GUY #1

Average? Hey, man. Average is

dumb!

They drop the mattress in place. With the window framing

these guys, the scene FREEZES, looking just like a comic book

panel.

INT. HARVEY’S APARTMENT - DAY

Harvey turns around from the scene and ponders it. He moves

back towards his pile of stick-figure drawings.

CLOSE ON PAPER:

Harvey scribbles the words “AMERICAN SPLENDOR” at the top of

the page.

CUT TO:

INT. CLEVELAND DINER - 1975 - DAY

The following scene is shot through the restaurant window.

We see reflections of people walking by.

A tense HARVEY starts at CRUMB as he eats a burger and reads

Harvey’s mock-ups. Harvey doesn’t touch his burger deluxe

and nervously talks in his laryngitis-afflicted voice.

27.

HARVEY:

See, ever since I read your stuff,

man I’ve been thinking I could

write comic book stories that were

different from anything being done.

CRUMB:

(munching on a fry)

Uh-huh.

HARVEY:

I’m thinkin’, the guys who do

animal comics and super-hero stuff

are really limited ‘cause they

gotta try to appeal to kids. And

underground comics like yours have

been really subversive or opened

things up politically. But there

is still plenty more ta be done

with ‘em, too, y’know?

CRUMB:

Pass me the ketchup?

HARVEY:

I mean with pictures and words, it

could be more of an art form. Like

those French movies are. Or De

Sica over in Italy, y’know? ... So

I tried writin’ some things about

real life. Stuff the everyman’s

gotta deal with.

Crumb finally looks up from Harvey’s work.

CRUMB:

These are about you.

HARVEY:

Er, yeah ...

CRUMB:

You turned yourself into a comic

hero?

.

HARVEY:

Sorta, yeah. But no idealized

sh*t. No phony bullshit. The real

thing, y’know? Ordinary life is

pretty complex stuff.

Crumb reads more. Harvey waits anxiously. Finally Crumb

starts to chuckle.

28.

CRUMB:

These are really good, Harv.

HARVEY:

(insecure)

Really? Ya think so?

Crumb shuffles through more.

CRUMB:

Yeah. This is great stuff, man. I

dig it. Can I take them home and

illustrate them?

Harvey is practically bursting.

HARVEY:

Wow!!

Harvey’s voice breaks like a kid in puberty. He clears his

throat. And something miraculous happens...

When Harvey opens his mouth to speak his LARYNGITIS IS GONE!

HARVEY (cont’d)

You’d do that for me, man? That’d

be great! I can’t draw a straight

line!

CRUMB:

Hey, what’s up with your voice,

Harv? All of a sudden it sounds

fine.

HARVEY:

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