American Splendor Page #6

(thrilled)

I don’t know, man! I guess you

cured me!

INT. V.A. HOSPITAL - SNACK ROOM HALLWAY - DAY

HARVEY bounds towards the snack room where a group of

hospital workers and patients hang out. He bangs on the

window to get their attention. When they look up, Harvey

waves a comic book in the air.

DISSOLVE TO:

29.

INT. V.A. HOSPITAL - SNACK ROOM - DAY

A GLOSSY, FULL-COLOR COMIC BOOK FEATURING THE TWO MATTRESS

GUYS:
Scrawled across the top in big red letters reads,

“AMERICAN SPLENDOR. Vol. #1”

A man’s finger points to the words, “All Stories by Harvey

Pekar. Art by R. Crumb.”

The comic book sits atop a table in the dreary snack room. A

crowd of HOSPITAL WORKERS, PATIENTS, DOCTORS, MAINTENANCE

WORKERS, etc. (under ten total) gather around a proud HARVEY

who shows off his work. For the first time, he seems almost

happy.

.

HARVEY:

(beaming)

See that? All stories by yours

truly.

A WWII VET PATIENT with a portable IV cranes to get a

glimpse.

WW II VET PATIENT

Hot off the presses, huh? We got a

regular Hemingway here.

HARVEY:

No way, Jack, I don’t go in for

that macho crap.

DOCTOR #3 chimes in.

DOCTOR #3

I didn’t know you could draw,

Pekar.

HARVEY:

Nah! I don’t draw. I just write

the stories. A buddy of mine and

some of his friends do the art

work.

TOBY, the supernerd from the bus stop, grabs the comic book

off the table and peruses it.

TOBY:

Harvey, am I in here? You promised

I would be in here.

30.

HARVEY:

Yeah! Yeah! You’re in there,

alright? Jeez, Toby.

SUDDENLY, MR. BOATS -- Harvey’s philosophical co-worker --

pushes his way thorough the crowd. He snatches the comic out

of Toby’s hand.

MR. BOATS

Let me see this.

TOBY:

Mr. Boats, it’s not polite to grab

things. Next time-

MR. BOATS

Son, you done good. Ya know, I was

up in Toronto a few weeks back an’

I saw the Red Chinese Ballet...

As Mr. Boats talks, the crowd starts to disperse.

MR. BOATS (cont’d)

Now that was beautiful. The way

those people were dancing together.

Those Chinese work hard. I tell

ya, they work hard -- Where is

everybody goin’?

Mr. Boats hands the comic book back to Harvey and turns on

his heels. Through the window he notices TWO VETS IN

WHEELCHAIRS moving down the hall.

MR. BOATS (cont’d)

Where these sickly men rushin’ off

to? They ain’t goin’ nowhere for

now. Maybe not for a long time.

But damn if they ain’t in a rush to

get there.

Harvey stands there, his moment of glory passed. But it’s

okay. He flips through his comic and smiles.

.

CUT TO:

EXT. STREET CORNER - ASSOC. OF POLISH WOMEN - 1975 - DAY

A motley group of GUYS hang out on a street corner in front

of the Association of Polish Women. HARVEY heads towards

them.

31.

MARTY:

Hey look guys, here comes Captain

America.

Harvey rolls his eyes.

PAHLS:

(yelling out)

You gonna hang with the boys now

that yer a comic book star?

Harvey turns red. He’s embarrassed but part of him loves the

attention.

HARVEY:

Cut it out. Man, I ain’t nothin’

yet compared to Bob Crumb.

GUY #3

Ah, listen to him. One lousy comic

book and he wants to be Crumb.

The GUYS laugh.

ANGLE ON SILENT GUY

A SILENT GUY crouches by the wall, reading his CLEVELAND

BROWNS trading cards.

PAHLS:

Hey Harvey, if ya wanna make comics

for adults, ya oughtta put some

dirty stuff in it.

GUY #3

Yeah, you can write about Marty’s

sex life.

Harvey hangs with the guys but he doesn’t engage. He seems

to be observing them more than interacting with them.

GUY #3 (cont’d)

Right Marty? I heard ya went out

with Bonnie yesterday.

PAHLS:

Yeah. Howdja do? Wudja git offa

her?

MARTY:

Ah, lousy. All’s I got wuz arm-

around.

32.

The guys all stare at him for a moment. Then they crack up.

CUT TO:

INT. SOUND STAGE - PRESENT - DAY

HIGH DEFINITION VIDEO DOCUMENTARY FOOTAGE

CLOSE UP:

A COPY OF AMERICAN SPLENDOR #2: A FULL-COLOR CARTOON VERSION

OF THE ABOVE SCENE GRACES THE COVER.

A MARTY LOOK-ALIKE is bombarded with questions about his date

with Bonnie. He complains that all he got was “arm-around.”

The REAL HARVEY holds the above comic book in his hand. The

stage is set with a few items that indicate a comic book

store. HARVEY talks about a couple of “American Splendor”

issues and how they impacted his life -- recognition as a

writer, etc. He gives his philosophy about the comic book,

etc.

.

A MONTAGE OF AMERICAN SPLENDOR COVERS (ISSUE #3, #4, #5, #6,

ETC.) THEY INDICATE A PASSAGE OF TIME ...

CUT TO:

INT. HARVEY’S CUBICLE - V.A. HOSPITAL - 1980’S - DAY

HARVEY sits alone in his cubicle. He doodles stick figures

on a pad -- some ideas for a new comic. His posture’s

miserable. He rubs his temples like he’s in anguish.

REAL HARVEY (V.O.)

Here’s our man eight comics later,

a brand new decade, same old

bullshit. Yeah sure, he gets lots

of recognition for his writin’ now.

Sure his comics are praised by all

the important media types tellin’

people what to think. But so what?

It’s not like he makes a livin’ at

it like Bob Crumb. He can’t go an’

quit his day job or nothin’.

JUMP CUT SEQUENCE

Several shots of Harvey just thinking, scratching his face

with a pencil, tapping his foot nervously.

33.

Each shot is separated by a second or two of black (an homage

to Harvey’s wordless panels). Finally, he goes back to

writing.

REAL HARVEY (V.O.) (cont’d)

Who am I kiddin’. Truth is I’d be

lost without my work routine.

FLASH CUT TO:

INT. HARVEY’S BEDROOM - 1980’S - NIGHT

Alone in bed, Harvey wakes up in a cold sweat from a

nightmare. He looks horrified, short of breath.

HARVEY:

(calming himself down)

I got a job ... I got a job ...

BACK TO:

INT. HARVEY’S CUBICLE - V.A. HOSPITAL - 1980’S - DAY

HARVEY scratches his head.

CLOSE UP ON HIS DOODLING

Harvey writes “I got a job” in a balloon over the stick

figure’s head.

REAL HARVEY (V.O.)

So -- to stave off desperation and

feelings of uselessness -- I

resigned myself to a menial

existence. But hey, maybe the guy

who’s had a happy life feels worse

just before he dies than th’ guy

who had a sad one. Or, maybe not.

I dunno. Maybe I just needed a

woman.

Toby comes in, decked out in plaid and stripes. He has an

empty messenger bag.

TOBY:

Hi, Harvey. Do you want these

gourmet jelly beans? I gave up

sweets for lent.

Harvey turns around. He seems down, depressed.

34.

HARVEY:

Huh? Sure, I’ll take ‘em.

Toby watches Harvey eat a few.

HARVEY (cont’d)

Hey, watermelon. That’s pretty

good.

TOBY:

I recommend the piña coladas. They

are excellent and very authentic

tasting.

Toby heads down a file row and proceeds to take a few off the

shelves, stuffing his bag. Harvey gets up and comes after

him.

HARVEY:

Hey Toby, can you eat lentils

during lent?

TOBY:

Sure. I don’t see why not. You

can’t eat meat on certain days, but

lentils should be acceptable

anytime.

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