Amira & Sam Page #5

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I'm OK, thanks.

No, no, no.

Come on,

let me buy you one lap

dance, at least, hmm?

Strip clubs give me flashbacks.

There were a lot of them

in the war.

They bombed us with strippers.

- Really?

- Sorry-Greg.

- You're leavin'?

- I'm gonna go.

What? Are we cool?

Yeah, we're cool.

Can you tell Charlie

I said good-bye?

Yeah, yes. Yeah.

- Good, great.

- I'll do that.

Enjoy the booty.

All right, I'll...

Fo shizzle. Ha ha!

You should sleep on the bed.

I'm OK, thank you.

No, really.

It's your home.

You should sleep on the bed.

I'm OK here.

I like the floor.

This is ridiculous.

You're being ridiculous.

I am on the floor because that's

the chivalrous thing to do.

I'm fine, seriously.

Go to your bed.

I'm in my bed.

This is my bed.

Look, if no one's

gonna sleep in the bed,

I will sleep in the bed.

Great.

All right.

This is so stupid.

Here. Come up on the bed.

I've saved you... 60%.

You're worried that

something's gonna happen?

I know nothing will happen.

Exactly.

What, do you think I'm

attracted to you or something?

Nope.

No, you've made it

abundantly clear

that you're not attracted to me.

Good.

So you can come up

on the bed whenever.

What's wrong?

Ahem. Just thinking.

About what?

Nothing important.

You're lying.

I can read your mind.

Good, good. If you

can read my mind, then...

you already know

what I'm thinking?

- Yes.

- Good.

You're thinking, "How can I keep

this secret away from Amira."

- Right?

- Mmm, no. Mm-mmm.

Just tell me what's going on.

Just worried about...

stu... I don't know.

This...

This job is stressful,

this new job.

Yeah, Wall Street is stressful.

I've seen those movies.

Is that what you

always wanted to do?

Never crossed my mind.

What did you want to do?

When I was a kid,

I was always the one

making other kids laugh,

telling funny stories,

thought I wanted to be

a comedian,

like a stand-up comedian.

You know those?

- Yes.

- OK.

Did you ever try it?

Yeah, I tried it once.

And?

I bombed.

Is "bombed" good or bad?

Bombed is bad.

Oh.

In my case, very bad.

Killed is good.

So, you want to kill, not bomb.

Yeah.

That's weird, man.

Yeah, usually one

leads to the other,

but not in this case.

Well, you should try it again.

Yeah, right... coming from

the girl who hates my stories.

Yeah, I do.

I think I'll get

a second opinion.

No, I just...

I found that book of yours,

the one with the jokes in it,

and... they're funny.

You did what?

I just found it.

You were looking

through my book?

- You left it out in the open.

- Nosy.

I left it out in the open

in my own home?

Yes, it was there, and I...

In my home, I left

a book out in the open.

- Yes.

- My private...

Didn't say "Private"

or anything.

I didn't leave it

on a park bench.

You're right, you're right.

I should have written

"Private" on it.

- Yep. Next time.

- It's my fault...

It is your fault.

For expecting you not to just

rifle through my stuff.

OK, look, I just said

it was funny.

- I'm silly.

- I was giving you a compliment.

- Thank you.

- Yeah, you're welcome.

Hey, I told you

something personal about me.

So, you should do that.

What?

You should tell me

something personal about you,

like, are you bald

under that thing?

Do you shower in it?

- Do you shave your pits?

- What?

I don't know,

is that an Arab thing?

- What?

- That's a French thing.

You're so strange.

Tell me something

I'd never guess about you.

Sometimes I punch people.

What?

When I get mad,

sometimes I punch people.

That's something you

should know about me.

Yeah, well, sometimes

people deserve it.

Yes.

So, you only...

you don't do it

very often, do you?

No. Just when

they deserve it.

- Yeah. Good.

- Mm-hmm.

Good. That's good.

Yeah, who...

Sometimes I punch people.

We have something in common.

What's going on?

This is what I do to my friends.

So, now we're friends.

Like it.

As long as we're sharing...

you want to know

what I do with my friends?

What?

That's pretty cool.

Yeah, my friends really dig it.

Yeah.

Do your friends like this?

What?

Ahem. Yeah, they

probably would like that

if, uh...

Yeah, I don't know

if they've ever

done anything like that before.

I'll have to ask them,

and we'll take a poll.

You know what they really like?

What?

This.

Oh! Come on!

No, no, stop.

Oh, sorry.

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

No, I'm more sorry.

No, I'm the sorriest.

Unh!

Sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm supposed

to be taking care of you.

This isn't part of that.

No. I...

This is inappropriate.

- Are you mad at me?

- No.

Are you mad at me?

No.

Good.

I'm not a virgin, you know.

I'm not a virgin either.

How you guys doing today?

- Good. How are you?

- Good, good. Name?

Sam Seneca.

Sgt. Seneca and Amira Jafari?

Have a good time.

- Thank you.

- Thank you.

- You're a sergeant?

- I was.

Charlie thinks I'm

still in the Army.

That's weird.

Best dressed man here.

Hey, Sammy, you look great.

- You must be Amira.

- Yes.

Hi. I'm Charlie.

It's nice to meet you.

It's nice to meet you, too.

Congratulations

on getting engaged.

This is like the most romantic

thing I've ever seen in person.

Thank you, thank you very much.

Hey, Sammy,

someone I want you to meet.

Oh, yeah, your fiancee?

No, no. Karl, excuse me.

Sam, I want you to

meet Karl Royce, former Marine.

No such thing

as a former Marine.

Once a Marine, always a Marine.

Yes, yes, of course.

I want you to meet

Sgt. Sam Seneca.

This is my cousin

and also my newest sales rep.

It's a pleasure to meet you.

- Sergeant.

- Sir.

Karl owns the nation's

largest shipping company,

and I thought maybe

you guys could,

I don't know, talk

shop or something.

Gladly. Do you mind

if we get a drink first?

- We just got here.

- Of course.

You know what, I can

get you guys a drink.

Oh, no, that's OK.

You have a lot of

people to entertain.

Karl, it was a pleasure

to meet you.

Sergeant.

All right, we'll talk later.

Yeah, he's a great salesman.

Two whiskeys, neat.

Sam?

Hello.

- Claire?

- Yes.

Wow.

What a pleasure

to finally meet you.

Same here.

Congratulations.

I know, already 5 months.

And you must be Amaya.

Amira.

Oh, right. Sorry.

Pleasure.

Thanks for having us.

Well, what do you think?

Well, I think Charlie's

doing all right.

Oh, he is.

He really is.

Yeah.

You know, there is somebody here

that you absolutely

have to meet.

- Simone!

- Oh, boy.

Simone, this is

Charlie's cousin Sam.

Yes, Sam, I've heard

so much about you.

Likewise.

It's wonderful to meet you.

My pleasure.

- I'm Amira.

- Sorry.

I didn't know

you were bringing a date.

I... well, no.

We're friends.

I'm a prostitute.

Or that.

I beg your pardon?

He even bought me this dress,

just like "Pretty Woman."

Right. Ahem.

She looks good in red.

Um, it was nice

to meet you both.

Yeah, Claire,

it was really a pleasure.

I'm sure we'll catch up

a little bit later.

What the f*** has got into you?

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