Animal Crackers Page #7

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and not the Beaugard, whose is it?

Someone switched it for mine,

thinking they got the original.

Somebody swiped my scheme, eh?

Then Chandler never saw

your painting? - No

You may still be a great artist.

Where is this picture?

Up in my room.

- You get it and I'll get the Captain.

He'll get to the bottom of this.

Then John found the third painting.

- Very interesting. Well, sort of.

We have to keep our eyes open. - If I

don't find it, Mother's out $100,000.

Give me 24 hours for the case.

Then we'll call in someone else.

Wait till tomorrow.

Remember the Charlie Ross case?

I was on that, and he was never found.

Captain Yard of Scotland Spaulding

always gets his women, or paintings.

Do you know what's happened

with the painting I found?

It's been stolen from my room.

You see! I've been on the case

five minutes and another one is gone.

I bet it's not even three minutes.

My watch is gone. This is too much.

It wasn't going, and now it's gone.

And my room was locked.

- Who could it have been?

Wait. I think I've got a clue.

No, it's a red hair.

The Professor? No, it couldn't be.

He's Crook of the Month this month.

Anyhow, we'll investigate it.

You know Conductor Hennessey?

- Inspector!

Inspect her yourself. You know

that redheaded fellow? - Yes.

Well, get those

flagpole sitters of yours to find him.

Come on, boys.

We'll soon get to the bottom of this.

Hey, what's that cop doing there?

It didn't take that long to find him.

- This is it!

Yes, but which one is it?

- The one just taken from my room.

Maybe my watch is back, too.

Vow the fob is gone!

Well, I still got the pocket.

Anything I retain now is velvet.

Except the coat. That's Prince Albert.

Well, all the jokes can't be good.

If we find the fella who painted this,

it'd be a pretty good clue. - What?

If we find the fella who painted this,

it'd be a pretty good clue.

You just said that.

How dull you turned out to be!

Let me see that a minute.

It's signed "Beaugard".

There's the criminal.

No Beaugard is dead.

Dead? Then it's murder!

Vow we've got something.

What do you got?

- Jacks and aces. And you?

Good. I was bluffing. - Does something

strike you funny about this picture?

It isn't as funny as all that.

Did you ever see a tree like that?

Tree? That's a spinach.

- It can't be. Where's the egg?

It could be spinach.

Look at all the sand.

You mean it's an old Spinach custom?

No, it's not that.

No That's my mistake.

You know what it is? Coleslaw.

Coleslaw?

- Yeah.

Did you ever see a coleslaw like that?

- Sure, look at this.

I don't want any of your lip now.

Did you ever see anything like that?

You know what this is?

A left-handed painting.

There's a signature.

- That's right.

This is either a left-handed painting

or a vegetable dinner.

If we can find the left-handed person,

we'll have "The Trial of Mary Dugan".

I saw that. Goodbye.

- Wait. I'm going to need you.

We mustn't lose this evidence.

Take it to your room

and leave the door open this time.

And not a word about this to anybody.

Not even to me.

Ravelli, we've got to find

the left-handed painting.

The first thing to do

is to find the motive.

What was the motive

of the Beaugard crooks?

I got it. Robbery!

Would you mind

crossing the street when it's red?

Si, Capt'. Sit down.

I know how we find this painting.

In such a mysterious case,

you gotta get the clues.

You gotta use the Sherlock Holmes

method. It goes like this:

You say, "What happened?"

The answer:
"Something was stolen."

You say, "What was stolen?"

The answer come back: "A painting."

Are you a ventriloquist?

Vow you say, "Where was this painting

stolen?" The answer: "In this house."

Vow, so far I'm right?

It's pretty hard to be wrong

if you keep answering yourself.

You go a little further and say,

"Who stole the painting?"

A very important question. When you

answer it, you got the whole solution.

Especially if you find the picture.

Vow put all the clues together

and what do ya got? - Bread pudding.

No Something was stolen. Where?

In this house. By who? Somebody here.

Vow all you gotta do is ask

everyone in the house if they took it.

I could rent you out

as a decoy for duck hunters.

You're going to ask everyone here

if they took the painting?

And suppose no one here took it?

- Go next door.

Great.

Suppose there is no house next door?

Well, then we gotta build one.

Vow you're talking.

What kind of house should we build?

My idea of a house is something

nice and small and comfortable.

Exactly, nothing elaborate.

A little place to call home and tell

the wife I'm not coming for dinner.

I see. You want a telephone booth.

No, in that case

I'd just call Chic Sale.

What do ya say

we build right about here?

Here? - Yeah, here.

- I'd like it over here if possible.

I don't like junior crossing the rails

on his way to reform school.

Actually I don't like junior at all.

Alright. We got something over there,

and believe me, that's convenient.

You just open the door, step outside,

and there you are.

There you are? Where?

- Outside.

If you want to get back in again?

- You had no right to go out.

Don't do anything

until I hear from you, will you?

Maybe the painting is in the cellar!

- That's no cellar, that's the roof.

Down there? - Yeah, so the chimney

don't get wet when it rains.

I'm off to get x-rayed.

I'll be back in a little while.

I think you're wrong, Ravelli.

- Don't get excited.

Here's the rooms.

This is your room. This is mine.

And this is the maid's room.

I'd have to go through your room?

That's alright, I won't be in it.

You couldn't put the maid in your

room? - Who says I couldn't?

There's going to be a lot of traffic.

I can see that.

Well, what do ya say?

You ready to sign the lease?

I'd like to talk to my husband first.

Could you come back later?

You married?

- I've got a girl as big as you are.

Alright. Get me one.

- Don't get vulgar, Ravelli.

How about the painting?

We take care of that.

I'll tell you my idea.

The kitchen should be white.

Outside, green. Inside, cerise.

The painting, I say!

What you think I talk?

Painting the kitchen white...

The painting that was stolen!

- Stolen?

Don't you remember? Mrs. Rittenhouse

lost a painting worth $100,000.

No, I'm a stranger here.

What do you think I am?

One of the early settlers?

Don't you remember Mrs. Beaugard

lost a Rittenhouse oil painting?

No, but I've seen you

someplace before.

Yeah, I was there.

But I'll stay away in the future.

Hey, Capt!

It come to me like a flash!

This painting wasn't stolen.

It has disappeared.

Yes, disappeared. And you know

what make it disappear?

Moths! Moths eat it!

Left-handed moths!

Go away.

I'll be alright in a minute.

Left-handed moths ate it?

- That's my own solution.

I wish you were in it.

Left-handed moths!

I'd buy you a parachute

if I thought it wouldn't open.

Hey, I got pair of shoes.

He's crazy.

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