Any Which Way You Can Page #2

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I'll find it. You better believe I'll find it.

- Have you seen Clyde?

- Yeah. Right behind you, Philo.

Lynn Halsey-Taylor, ladies and gentlemen.

Now, let's everybody get ready

for Fats Domino.

He ain't supposed to be out like this.

What did I do?

I was just singing a number

and he came in and sat down.

He probably got lost

and recognized this place.

Maybe he wanted to see me.

Not everybody hates me, you know.

I don't hate you.

I can take just about any kind of pain.

There's just one I have no tolerance for.

Some kinds I can't tolerate either.

You got to do another set?

No, I'm just doing one set a night.

They're all here to see Fats.

- You sound good.

- Thank you.

Real good.

Do you have any wheels?

No.

I'll give you a ride home. If you like.

I like.

This is it?

- Anything wrong with it?

- No. Not a thing.

- Well, I guess I can't ask you in.

- I guess not.

Good night, Clyde.

Thanks, Philo.

Shut up, meathead.

It's Philo Beddoe!

- Are we bad mothers?

- We are bad mothers!

Hey, Beddoe, it's us.

Are you talking to me?

I ain't talking to you, Beddoe.

I'm reading your death warrant.

I didn't know you boys could read.

Now that's real cute, real cute.

We're going to kill you slow, boy.

It will take maybe a week.

Well, I wouldn't want to rush you.

First day, you'll probably be shaking

like some blind f*ggot at a weenie roast.

You got him real good, Cholla,

you got him real good with that one.

Shut your hole!

Except this time,

it ain't going to be no weenie roast.

No, this time it's going to be an ape roast!

Right turn, Clyde.

Cholla, they're getting away.

Why me?

What the hell.

I guess maybe it's time.

She's in Room 25,

but you can't go up there.

No, ma'am, I know that.

- You are not allowed up there!

- I won't be long, ma'am.

Operator, get me the police.

Excuse me, ma'am.

Wait a minute.

Excuse me, ma'am,

I didn't see a thing, hardly.

- You aren't allowed up here!

- I know that, ma'am.

- Who is it?

- Philo.

You're not allowed up here.

That must be true.

You're the third person who's told me that.

Well?

Well, we've got an extra room

at the house.

I don't need any handouts.

Handouts you get from the government.

A hand up is what you get from friends.

Are you a friend?

I'm a friend.

Well, I don't have so many friends

that I can afford to lose one.

What is it?

Sorry, ma'am.

What we got here, ladies,

is a case of wishful thinking.

They all think we moon around all day,

lusting after their bodies.

Some of us do, Rita.

Where's Clyde?

Sh*t.

- How are you gonna write this one up?

- I'm not. But you were a lot of help.

You can always say she was nuts

about your toothpaste smile.

You could bust them

for harassing an officer.

Just shut up.

It's them!

- Come on, we can catch them!

- You catch them.

- So, where are you going to sleep?

- We got a guest room out back, I told you.

- Good night.

- Good night.

Clyde, you still up?

What are you doing, pal?

An Oreo cookie for me?

I'll save mine till later.

- Mind if I come in?

- No, not at all.

What was that?

Just a cookie I was saving till later.

Well, never mind.

You can have me instead.

No looking now.

We chased him away.

Fresh air's good for him.

Besides, he'll guard the door.

Is he reliable?

Anything that gets past Clyde

is 40 feet high with fangs.

- I think we're safe.

- I think.

I think I love you.

I think that's a piece of luck for me.

Philo?

Jordan said he'll give us $200

if we scrap that Merc for him.

Great. Clyde, scrap the Merc.

Clyde, you got work to do.

Mind if I jog with you?

Hell, no.

We must be three miles out.

How much further before you turn back?

A couple more.

That's ten miles round trip.

- You do this every day?

- More or less.

I'm not sure I'm gonna make it.

I'm kind of new to this physical stuff.

You're doing real good.

Thanks.

The doc said I had to get some exercise.

All I do is sit behind a desk all day.

You sit behind it, or you carry it around?

Well, I play a little squash sometimes.

- You look like you do some lifting.

- A little.

- Mostly engine blocks.

- That'll do the job.

- Careful of that soft shoulder, there.

- It's a hell of a drop.

You got a pretty good grip for a new guy.

There's a lot of strength in fear.

- Believe I owe you.

- I believe you do.

- You can't do this fight.

- Why not?

I've been checking with some people

and I found out who Jack Wilson is.

Look, the fight will get us a new truck,

a new roof, and a few extras for Ma.

- He killed two men last year.

- One.

The other one's lying someplace with

nothing below the neck but memories.

I told them I was going to do it.

I know I don't have much influence

with you anymore...

...since you got a girlfriend.

But damn it, Philo, you can't do this!

Well, I'm going to do it.

Don't go telling Lynn about Wilson now,

you hear?

Damn.

Move over, Clyde.

Looks like both of us are getting aced.

- A friend of yours?

- Yeah.

Nice voice. Nice style.

I think so.

Why don't you get somebody who can sing

around here?

- That's not polite.

- Forget it.

The complaint department

is open now, sonny.

- You play a hell of a game of squash.

- So do you.

- I believe that makes us even.

- I believe it does.

Find out what you want to know?

Yeah, I did.

You're fast and you like pain.

You eat it like candy.

I've seen a few cases like that in my time.

The more they get hurt,

the more dangerous they become.

But you got to be durable, too.

Real durable.

Most ain't.

You're right. Most ain't.

Let's call this fight off.

There's no point to it.

I ain't doing it for points.

You're good, but you're not good enough.

I don't want to hurt you,

and that's the truth.

Sometimes we can't always do

what we want to do. Right?

Your money's no good here.

Thank you.

- Pleasure watching you work.

- Same here.

Who was that?

That was a friend of mine.

We used to play squash sometimes.

I don't want you to fight.

You, too? I thought you weren't

supposed to say anything to her.

I thought she would have more influence.

Don't do it, Philo.

- I'm doing it, and that's the end of it.

- But he kills people.

The subject ain't open for discussion.

Go ahead, get yourself killed,

you selfish lunkhead.

Better still.

Let him scramble your brains

and turn you into a turnip...

...so I can spend the next 20 years

watering you.

You, too?

All right. Clyde, go get the money.

Go ahead.

Orville.

Here's the card. Call that guy and tell him

to come and get his dough.

Under my own mattress. Humiliating.

Outsmarted by a banana-head.

I spent the last five hours

on a very bumpy airplane, Mr. Beddoe.

I'm not in a good mood.

- I don't blame you.

- We have a deal, Mr. Beddoe.

We had a deal.

Clyde, get the man his money back.

One does not cancel deals

with James Beekman.

One takes one's money back,

or else Clyde gets bugged at one.

I am holding it for you, Mr. Beddoe.

I will add $15,000 to it and give it to you

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