Are You Here Page #6

which you listed here

as "small farmer."

I also see that you've

never considered medication.

Anti-depressants?

They have been suggested,

as they have been

to most of America.

Well, I was thinking

more like a mood stabilizer,

which for most is a very

effective therapeutic solution.

No need to resist

the magic of lithium, I know.

We should sprinkle its salty goodness

over the fries at McDonald's

until we're "Dawn of the Dead"

drooling towards Banana Republic,

pushing our carts

dazed through the market,

throwing the meat in,

black blood pooling

under so much plastic.

That's an interesting image.

Which I wouldn't have

if I was zonked on that sh*t.

I wouldn't feel

this hum I've got going.

Clear, sharp,

and purposeful,

like every ion in my body

is vibrating with genius.

Marijuana is a chemical.

It's green and from the Earth.

But it's a drug,

a way of dealing

with your symptoms.

Like the drug you get

when you go into a restaurant

or come home after work,

or offer a stranger the moment

they come into your house.

Our whole social system

is built around some drug.

Most cultures made beer

before they had an alphabet.

I'm going to ask you

some questions,

and you can just tell me

yes or no, okay?

Do you experience sensations

of things that are not there?

Do you hear voices?

Are you afraid right now?

There are times

that are wonderful,

and there are times

that are horrible.

And the wonderful thing is

right now, I feel alive.

But the terrible thing is

that you're not asking me

how I feel

about my father dying.

Oh, well I was going...

I feel alone

in the universe,

except for Steve.

So why do you think

you're here?

Because I won the lottery.

Everybody's got their hand out.

Now action back

lo Barry with his suited ace.

80,000 to call

to see a flop here.

And he will have

position after.

Yes, yes,

you'll clean up later.

No... motherfucking

goddamn dammit!

Look at it.

It's huge.

Leaves and acorns

everywhere.

You got to get rid

of it.

The building is called

The Oaks.

It's the only one left.

It's just a tree.

It blocks

all the natural light,

Plus, it decreases

the value of my unit.

I can circulate a petition

if you want,

but you know

everybody feels the same,

and you got to be sick

of cleaning up all this crap.

I'll see what I can do.

Great, that's all I can ask.

Oh, and Steve...

thanks for

the Oriole tickets.

Freebies, Arman.

Don't be impressed.

I happen to

be in charge here.

Stop asking me

where the debate is,

because I'm not going.

Ben? We all agreed on

the starting place,

and that's where

it's going to be.

and it's not about whose

got the most...

Ben, who's in there

with you?

Hey.

Were you on the phone?

No.

My diagnosis,

as I wrote,

is classic bipolar disorder.

Euphoric

with schizoid tendencies.

See? I told you.

So in your assessment,

Dr. Vincent,

you see Mr. Baker

as being incapable

of understanding

any consequences

for his actions.

Yes.

That is all we have

to say, Your Honor.

Uh, Mr. Baker...

have you been having difficulty

distinguishing

between real and unreal?

My whole life.

This is

a very serious diagnosis.

Would you describe him as a danger

to himself or to other people?

Actually, I would say no.

Not at this moment.

It is, of course,

completely possible.

Well, I'm prepared

to rule on this.

Mr. Baker, Ms. Coulter,

I have to agree

with Dr. Vincent's finding

that Mr. Baker is... I'm sorry to talk

about you as though you weren't here,

but this 11-page

handwritten brief

didn't help, son.

He is seriously

mentally troubled.

And he's likely to behave

with this money

in a extremely

irresponsible manner.

But hopefully, he won't,

because as long as he's not a

threat to himself or other people,

he can go out and buy the world's

largest hat, if he wants to.

Your Honor,

you don't understand.

Look, your father could have

left his money to his dog.

The law is crystal clear.

If the government

gets their piece,

the mandates of the deceased

are to be observed.

Ben, I'm just looking out

for you, I swear.

No, I'm looking out

for you.

Every time

I think you're crazy

along comes

the justice system.

Woo!

Is this great or what?

Yeah, Glenlivet scotch

in a sh*t hole like this?

I'm buying everything.

Bartender, drinks

on the house!

My man!

Yeah!

I am not buying

everybody a drink.

No, I think he means

drinks are on him.

What did I say?

Hey, my mom... my mom just

gave me the message.

Congratulations. Oh, thanks.

It means so much.

I don't know if you've ever

met my friend, Steve Dallas.

Steve, this is Zed Starkevitch.

Hi.

He's kind of the chief administrator

of the whole Omega Society.

I guess we should be saying

congratulations to you.

Can we get another beer?

To transforming society

from within.

To being a tapeworm

gnawing

on its intestines,

sucking and feeding

on the bile and waste,

growing stronger

every minute.

Okay, I'm going to let

you two celebrate.

Zed, can your mom

take you and Ben home?

My mom's blind.

I'm bottling this moment.

You done

celebrating?

You got to come

out here.

You got to see this.

Where's Ben?

Still hanging out.

Look at all these stars.

Have you seen this?

Yeah.

Yeah, I have.

H's pretty great.

Can you dance?

You can't handle it.

Come over here.

What is this?

What are you

talking about?

Don't mess with me.

This. This place

and you.

You, your face.

I don't know

what to say.

Because you like me.

What?

Kiss me again

or slap me or something,

but you got to stop looking

at me all beautiful like that,

or you're going

to get more of this.

So you'd like more?

I don't know.

I don't know

who you are.

I know it's horrible.

But this is really it.

This is who I am.

There's some good

in it, I promise.

I have hobbies and stuff.

I always pick up

the check.

You're stoned.

You're always stoned.

Actually, I'm drunk

right now,

but again, that's part

of who I am.

My personal ad?

"Loves to have a good time."

That's what I mean.

I eat life

out of the big box.

I'm not hiding out here

in the sticks

or wherever it is

you're going to next.

Doesn't it seem strange

that someone who

eats life like you do,

who has it all,

is trying to escape it?

I like you.

I bet you haven't had

an interaction with anyone

in the last ten years

that wasn't warped somehow.

My guess is you got some kind

of freefall going on in there,

but you hide it all

under this veil of charm

that people prefer

to real interaction.

I don't.

You think I'm charming?

Just to be clear,

if I'm sober,

you're interested?

Goodnight.

People treat the environment

like it's a big toilet.

They can dump everything they

don't want, and flush it down,

and they're never

going to see it again.

Who the hell

do you think you are?

Excuse me?

People get

a little bit of money,

all of a sudden, they think

everything they say is true.

You're still a big fat nothing.

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