Asthma Page #3

Just keep it together, alright?

I'm good.

Oh, yeah.

No, I, I lost my phone.

I told you,

dad's a f***in' a**hole.

That's not your problem.

You got enough

to worry about as it is.

Well, I'm... I'm,

I'm in Connecticut, yeah.

I don't know, just... just

a spur of the moment thing.

I'm at a friend's place.

No, you don't know her.

Her name's Ruby, ma.

She's just a friend.

Yeah.

No, I'll prob..

I'll probably stay here tonight.

Hey, ma, I, uh...

can't really talk right now..

...okay?

Yeah, I love you too.

Alright, bye.

What a dick.

So what do you do?

If you don't mind my asking.

Um..

...I... I work at Taco Bell.

He's an actor.

No, I quit acting.

I quit acting.

He doesn't work at Taco Bell.

That's true, I don't

but, uh, but the tacos,

when you're f***ed up

you know,

there ain't nothin' better.

Oh, my God, I love Taco Bell.

Then what the f***

with all this tofu crap, man?

F***.

There's no need to be

so aggressive.

I'm sorry,

I apologize for my friend.

He's had kind of a rough

48 hours.

Oh, I really love that show.

"The First 48 Hours,"

you know... when they..

There's, like, a criminal

that they're trying

to track down for murders

and what not.

It's really good, they..

People always

kinda give up though, it's..

You know..

Thank you for sharing,

Bottlecap.

You come to a neighbor's house..

...and they're kind enough

to cook a fine meal for you

and what do you do?

You insult it.

You insult us.

You're probably thinkin' I'm

gonna come after you now, right?

Probably worried I'm gonna

jump across the fire pit

and stab you in the neck with

a... fork, right?

Well, wrong.

You know why?

You're just being a human being.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

It's normal.

Those emotions are normal.

Ever since I met Lilly..

...it's been a sort of

a spiritual awakening.

You know,

on a day-to-day level

like what you put in your body,

it's important.

- Yeah.

- But I really miss meat. I do.

So, um,

you and Lilly are together?

Is that, is that right?

- No. We're friends. Totally friends.

- Oh.

But, um, she's my yoga teacher.

And Ragen's my teacher.

No, he's all of our teacher.

And this delicious tofu

is part of his process.

I love the tofu.

I didn't think I would, but the texture

is different, not like food, but..

Nobody gets hurt from it either.

You can't choke on it.

What's your favorite animal?

My spirit animal or my,

just favorite animal in general?

I didn't really...

I know, but, Bottlecap,

that's your whole..

...job is to write it down,

and you didn't write it down.

What were you thinking?

I feel so relaxed right now.

Really? I'm not feeling

f***in' anything.

Max!

- Hey, Bree!

- What the f***?

Have you been here

this whole time?

- Yeah.

- Oh, my God!

- I haven't seen you!

- I know.

I got super stoned

and passed out and..

Now I can't find my straw hat.

- Have you seen it?

- No, sorry.

My straw hat.

Have you seen my hat?

We'll let you know if we see it.

Have you seen my hat?

Has anyone seen my hat,

a straw hat?

F***, you know,

I left my keys in my hat

and I can't leave

if I don't find my hat.

- It's like..

- Oh!

I always do this.

His f***in' hat.

Everyone just talks

and talks and talks.

No one's saying a f***in' thing!

I wish I had some money,

so I can get a house like this

outside of the city.

There's too many bugs

out here. I hate it.

This whole property,

it's so unreal.

I guess I don't really care

that much about money.

I know about you and Logan.

What?

He's my friend.

Last night was amazing,

and now you're just over it.

Can we just really

not do this right now?

I'm, like, rolling

and I'm having fun

and I wanna go swimming.

Alright, fine, go for a swim.

Gussy, Gussy, Gussy.

Too bad you can't sing.

You would've been

a real cool rock singer.

F*** you, f*** you, okay?

And not that

it's any of your business.

Poor guy.

What a lost soul.

Ruby.

Hey.

Ruby.

Ruby.

- What?

- Oh, man.

I think I might be

in love with you.

Really?

I don't know. Probably.

What's the f***in' difference?

You're... f***in' this guy.

- I didn't f*** him.

- Oh, come on. I..

Hey, guys, sorry...

to interrupt

but I'm gonna go

have a cigarette.

I feel a little uncomfortable.

Sorry, man, I... I didn't know

you guys were together.

Yeah, we're not.

Okay.

What do you want from me?

Everything.

Everything? Wow!

Well, at least you're honest.

Let's make babies.

Huh?

Have a family and stuff

and little, like..

...cabbages running

around the city.

Mixtures of you and me.

That'd be pretty f***in'..

Gus, you're so high.

Forget about it, don't worry.

You got too many tattoos

to be a mommy anyway.

I was... I was just joking.

F***in' kids would come out

with f***in' tattoos anyway.

Happy New Year.

Gimme one of those?

- It's my last one.

- Ooh.

Thank you.

Whoo!

You got a lighter?

I am a lucky..

You are a waste.

What now?

What now?

I don't, I don't know.

I... I think

we're supposed to fight.

I mean, I don't wanna fight.

I... I just..

I don't wanna fight you, man.

It's just what men do

in these situations. They fight.

I'm not, I'm not

a good fighter though.

I don't, I don't think I..

...I'd probably

pull your hair or something.

- Don't pull, don't do that.

- Great.

Well... let's... let's agree

to not fight then.

It's... not a good way

to... end a party, you know?

- I don't wanna fight you.

- Okay, good.

I don't even know

why we would be fighting.

This girl.

Oh, yeah, the girl.

Ruby's very special.

Fighting for the girl.

She's tattooing me tomorrow.

No matter what happens

between us

it's, it's gonna last forever

or at least till I'm dead,

you know

and my body decomposes...

Gussy, Gussy, Gussy.

Are you thinking about her?

Yeah, I am now.

Or you thinking about yourself?

No lectures, please.

What do you think they're doing?

Huh? What do you think

they're doing in there?

Hey.

Great, I can't get you

to shut up

and when I ask you a question..

Let me tell you a story, Gus.

Once upon a time,

there was a young punk

who thought he was invincible

who thought

nothing could hurt him.

And every day, he would go

to fight a dragon.

It's a f***in' stupid

fairy tale.

You're talking

to a damn werewolf.

And as usual,

you missed the point.

Now shut up and listen.

Learn something for a change.

So this punk would go

into the dragon's lair

and he would yell,

"Hey, you f***in' dragon

today is the day is the day."

And the dragon looked up

at him and said

"Just let the dragon sleep,

Gus."

And pray.

You pray in silence.

Think of..

...something really beautiful.

And enjoy the moment.

Feel the ground..

...that you stand upon.

And take a breath in..

What is this?

Huh. Hey, Lou.

Perfect.

Hmm. Is it hard to do them

yourself, to yourself?

Um, I've done this one myself

but the others, I've gotten done

from friends.

Oh, really?

It's interesting to inflict pain

upon yourself.

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