Back To Black Page #3

Then… maybe, I’ll get back in your studio.

So, you know what? See you whenever.

Where are you off to, then?

I’ll get the Tube back.

What are we gonna tell Mitch?

Tell him he’s a big fat joke!

(♪ THE SPECIALS: “Ghost Town” playing on jukebox)

(Whooping)

And to the victor… the spoils!

Barman, a pint of your classiest German lager, please, at the double.

Por favor.

♪ Hey, big spender ♪

(♪ Humming)

Boys! Gypsy Rose, 16-1, early doors at Kempton!

Go on, son!

Cheeky tenner on that, thank you.

Ha! Won by a nose did Gypsy Rose.

Now, to happily piss it all up the wall.

I like your tattoo.

I like yours.

Get her a drink, quick. She likes my tattoo.

What you on?

Rickstasy.

Ecstasy I’ve heard of, but…

Southern Comfort, vodka, Bailey’s and banana liqueur.

Over ice.

Yeah, don’t forget the f***ing ice!

Jesus, I’m pissed just thinking about it. D’you get all that, Gilly?

(Gilly) You got it, mate.

Thank you.

Don’t thank me, thank Gypsy Rose.

Yeah.

Bloody hell, what’s this?

A vision is forming in my lager-ball.

It’s very clear what the future holds for you, young lady.

You’re gonna get very drunk and smoke lots of fags.

F*** me, what’s that?

I see a dirty, sweaty, horrible doner kebab

on your way home, with bare chilli sauce.

I don’t like chilli sauce.

Honey and mustard, then.

More like it.

See, bosh! Lager-ball never lies.

Right, I’m off to fleece my mates at pool. Nice to meet you, darlin’.

I’m Blake, by the way.

Amy.

Stay lucky, Amy.

(Blake) Yes, yes, yes!

Now, then, how we doing? Alright?

What we on? What we on? I’m in the bees and honey. Likewise.

Same again? Same again, yeah?

And again, Gilly!

Play the winner.

Oh, that’ll be me.

Shot!

Rack ’em up, then.

What rules are we playing, US or UK?

(Blake) UK. Always UK.

(♪ Jukebox plays “Know You Now”)

♪ You’re just a little boy underneath that hat… ♪

Are you taking the piss?

What? It’s a tune.

♪ You think everything gets handed to you free

Are you trying to make a mug out of me?

What?

What?

Sing.

No.

Go on, sing.

A little one.

Do one.

Alright.

(♪ Blake humming)

♪ I gotta know you now and then…

Yes!

Go on. Ha-ha!

Madness.

Madness, man.

I’m playing pool with Amy Winehouse,

listening to my favourite Amy Winehouse song,

with… Amy Winehouse.

Can this day get any more scintillating?

Never know your luck, son.

(Jukebox) ♪ I gotta know you now

♪ We may never meet again

♪ I gotta know you now and then…

Oh, really?

Yeah, I’m beating you.

(♪ Music over dialogue)

Ooh, so close!

♪ I’m not ruling you out

♪ I’m just in doubt

♪ As to what you say you’re all about

♪ Yeah, I gotta know you now

♪ We may never meet again

♪ I’ve gotta show you now ♪

‘F*** Me Pumps.’

Oh, God, here we go.

‘F*** Me Pumps’ is off its head, yeah.

Thank you.

Like its author.

Obviously.

Obviously.

But it has me in stitches every time.

I like that, I like stitches.

♪ With your big empty purse…

Oh, my God!

♪ Every week it gets worse

♪ At least your breasts cost more than hers ♪

Not… not very feminist, though.

Well, I don’t know…

I just don’t like girls being silly, wasting their potential.

Same as skinny indie boys that pretend they’re Pete Docherty.

Easy.

(Laughs)

Anyway, I’m not a feminist. I like boys too much.

I’m just joking, obviously.

Anyway, you know what I do. What do you do?

I am a video production assistant.

Oh, wow.

So, you make tea?

No, I don’t make tea, Winehouse. I make the best tea.

Amazing. I love tea. Will you come over and make me a brew?

Okay. Yeah. Where do you live?

I live in Jeffrey’s Place, Camden Town.

I know it, yeah. It’s nice.

Hmm.

Where do you live?

Erm… sort of sofa surfing at the moment.

I’m in between a couple of things, like… yeah.

I like to sabotage myself.

Do you know what I mean? Not even like, just enjoy.

Yeah. I get that.

I like your style, Winehouse.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Yeah. What do you call it, then, the Winehouse style?

Dunno. It’s a bit vintage, innit?

A bit of an anachronism, aren’t I?

Eh?

You know, like an old school girl but living now.

Right. Yeah. Deep.

Don’t you think things actually were better, though, in the olden days?

Totally.

That saying is actually true.

Like better films, better music.

Right.

Better books, like Fellani… Fellini.

Fellini, yeah.

Truman Capote…

Yep.

Er… The Beatles.

The Beatles. The Specials.

Yeah.

I mean, I dunno, they’re old.

Well, a little bit, now.

A little bit.

My favourite writers are people like, you know, Bukowski, Hunter S Thompson,

people that can actually show you how f***ing ugly life is.

You’re stupid if you don’t drink yourself silly, d’you know what I mean?

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you know The Shangri-Las?

No.

What?

What?

Amy, The Shangri-Las.

I’ve never heard of them.

Only the best sixties girl band ever.

All, like, excitement, atmosphere… How can I put this?

…emotional turbulence.

Hmm, nicely put.

Thank you. Hold that, hold that.

♪ My folks were always… ♪

‘Is she really going out with him?’

‘Well, there she is. Let’s ask her.’

‘Betty, is that Jimmy’s ring you’re wearing?’

‘Mm-hmm…’

‘Gee, it must be great, riding with him. Is he picking you up after school today?’

‘Mm-hmm.’

‘By the way, where’d you meet him?’

♪ I met him at the candy store

Oh, my God!

‘You get the picture?’

‘Yes, we see.’

♪ That’s when I fell for the leader of the pack

(Motorcycle revving)

Ho, ho, ho!

♪ My folks were always putting him down

♪ Down, down

♪ They said he came from the wrong side of town

♪ What d’you mean when you say that he came from the wrong side of town?

♪ They told me he was bad

♪ But I knew he was sad

♪ That’s when I fell for the leader of the pack…

What are you doing?

I was just doing a bit of Shangri-Las with Amy.

This is Amy, the singer.

Yeah. That’s me. Hello.

This is Becky.

Let’s go. I’m hungry.

See you later. It was nice chatting.

What… Blake?

Don’t forget that cup of tea, yeah?

Nice pumps, Becky.

(♪ BILLIE HOLIDAY: “All Of Me” playing on jukebox)

(Retching)

♪ Why not take all of me? ♪

(Gasps)

F***ing hell, Jules. Scared me.

Sick again, are we?

Oh… Yeah, way too much to drink.

Hmm… Yeah, it’s the drink, obviously.

I’m being woken up all the time by you puking whatever up.

I’m on holiday, aren’t I?

Yeah, but I got work in the morning.

Alright. I’ll be sick quieter.

How about not being sick?

I met someone tonight, Jules.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

We got on…

…like, really got on.

(Laughs)

Just had a few drinks, though, you know, nothing else.

He had the most gorgeous blue eyes.

There was a moment when we just looked at each other, you know.

No words needed, we just…

…melted into each other.

No embarrassment.

Just felt so… warm.

Yeah.

What did you say his name was?

Blake.

Blake? (Sniffs)

Jewish?

Didn’t ask, but no.

(Giggles)

Well, how do you know?

He had loads of tattoos.

Well, so have you!

What happened to that lovely manager you brought back for dinner?

Eh? A nice Jewish boy.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote