Back to School
- PG-13
- Year:
- 1986
- 96 min
- 1,211 Views
Thorny.
You call this a report card?
What kind of marks is these?
How you gonna go to college
with marks like these?
I don't want to go to college.
I want to work
in the shop with you.
You want to work
in the shop with me, huh?
Listen to me.
I said it once,
and I'll say it again...
I don't care how rich
or successful a man is...
if he don't got an education,
he's got nothing.
- I tried, Pop. I can't do it.
- Then try harder!
You can do anything in life
you want to do.
Remember... you're a Meloni.
Hi there.
Are you a large person?
Pleasantly plump? A little
on the hefty side, perhaps?
Well, let's face it.
Are you fat?
When you go jogging,
do you leave potholes?
When you make love,
do you have to give directions?
At the zoo, do elephants
throw you peanuts?
Do you look at a menu
and say, "OK"?
Well, now you can
eat all you want...
because at Thornton Melon's
Tall and Fat stores...
we've got you covered.
That's right... fine woolen
and sport coats
in all the larger sizes...
husky, stout, extra-stout
and the new Hindenburg line.
And for you ladies,
we have caftans, muumuus...
and our own exclusive A-frame
in all colors and patterns.
Yes, we have
miles and miles of fabric.
So take it from me,
Thornton Melon...
if you want to look thin,
you hang out with fat people.
Thornton Melon's Tall and Fat...
Lou, did you see the new spot?
Yeah, I seen it.
Do I look fat in it?
You could lose
a couple of pounds.
Pocahontas, how are you?
Ophelia, hold some of my calls.
Yes, sir, Mr. Melon.
Good morning, everyone.
Morning.
Take it easy, will ya?
And don't get any on the walls.
OK, folks. What's up?
Mr. Melon,
we have a serious offer...
on your commercial property
in south Florida...
and we feel you should sell.
No. Hold it for one more year,
take the depreciation...
then transfer title
to the California Corporation.
Show it as a capital gain.
We should do great.
What else?
The toy division has come up
with a new doll idea...
to go along with our
children's clothing line.
We call them Melon Patch Kids.
Now, the competition
exploits the notion...
are not orphans.
They're abandoned.
We think it's a winner.
OK, go with it.
But keep the unit cost
under five bucks.
Last year, we took a bath
on those Chubby Tubby Tub toys.
- Jason's on the phone.
- Jason.
OK, everybody, take a break.
Excuse me, Mr. Melon,
but we have a very long agenda.
- Later. My son's on the phone.
- But, Mr. Melon!
Beat it, punk.
Jason, how are you?
How you doin'?
How's the diving going?
Oh, it's great.
We just finished up practice.
Oh, keep it up, keep it up!
And the fraternity...
I'll bet you're having fun
in the fraternity, huh?
What do you think?
Yeah, it's great.
Oh, that's great.
You're not doing too much,
are you? You studying?
Well, right now,
we're between semesters...
again for another week.
No classes? Then come home.
Tonight, your mother and I
are having a big party.
It's our fifth anniversary.
Whoa, Dad. She's not my mother,
she's your wife...
and I don't get the feeling
she wants me around.
OK, let's not start that again.
I'll tell you what.
I'll come up there to see you.
No. Bad. Bad idea.
I got this big dive meet
coming up.
I gotta practice. I wouldn't
have any time to see you.
- It's a rotten time.
- OK. I understand.
Look, Dad, I promise...
I'll come down for a visit
next break I get, OK?
All right?
Look, I gotta go, OK?
OK, Jason.
Take care of yourself.
I love you.
Yeah, I love you, too.
All right. Bye-bye.
Melon, I told you
to clean my locker.
If it's too much for you...
we'll get ourselves
a new towel boy.
Right. Look, I'm sorry, Chas.
I'll get on it as soon as I can.
Home sweet home.
- I liked the old house better.
- So did I.
I liked the old wife
better, too.
Lay off Vanessa.
Lou, I can't believe it.
Married five years.
Seems like yesterday.
And you know what a lousy day
yesterday was.
Please don't throw your clothes
on the Breuer chair.
How come all our furniture
has names?
I have absolutely
nothing to wear.
You got six closets
full of nothing to wear.
Are you saying
I spend too much money?
You, spend too much money? No.
Lots of people go to Switzerland
You have no taste, Thornton.
You're right.
I married you, didn't I?
I don't have time to argue.
Our friends will be here
any minute.
You mean your friends.
They are my friends,
and I'd like to keep them.
So please,
Don't worry. If the roast beef
is right, they'll be back.
Jennifer, you look divine.
And, Peter, I thought
you were still in Portofino.
Why haven't you called?
- She's a lovely gal.
- Oh, yes, she is.
Oh, Ramon,
you look fantastic.
I thought you were still
in Tijuana.
- Excuse me, seor?
- Nothing. It's all right.
- Gimme a beer.
- I'm sorry, seor.
All we have is martinis
and champagne.
My own house,
I can't get a beer.
Mrs. Melon gave us
strict orders... no cerveza.
It's all right.
I'll get it myself.
Hey! Adam and evil.
Mr. Melon.
We was just...
Iooking for some
cocktail napkins.
Where? Under her dress?
You're impossible.
And you're easy.
I love Klimt, don't you?
Mr. Melon, your wife
was just showing us her Klimt.
You too, huh? She's showin' it
to everybody.
- She's very proud of it.
- I'm proud of mine, too.
I don't wave it around
at parties.
- It's an exceptional painting.
- Oh, the painting.
Yeah. Drink up,
enjoy yourself, huh?
I hate small food, you know?
Hey, buddy,
come here, will you?
Put your hand
right over there, will you?
I learned this in Europe.
Look out, coming through.
Hot stuff. Look out.
I'd like you to meet
Mr. And Mrs. Stuyvesant.
Right, right.
- How do you do?
- Thornton!
How you doin'?
Hi there, sir. How are you?
Never mind. I got my own here.
It's all right.
Millicent, you look charming.
I love your dress.
Don't you, Thornton?
It's such a lovely shade
of green.
Yeah. If that dress had pockets,
you'd look like a pool table.
You should try
my Tall and Fat stores.
No offense.
May I speak to you
privately, please?
Watch my sandwich, will you?
I can't take any more of this!
You've insulted our friends,
you've insulted me...
and you've gone out of your way
to ruin this party.
Party? Are you kiddin'?
It's a dog show out there.
Your friends, they come here
for free food, free booze...
and to suck up to you
for donations.
You have no class, Thornton,
and I am tired of it.
I want a divorce.
Divorce. I knew
we had something in common.
Here, sign these.
that easy, honey.
This is gonna cost you...
plenty!
Oh, yeah?
Let's talk about class
a minute, all right?
Here's you and Giorgio
in the guest room.
Classy, isn't it?
Translation
Translate and read this script in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"Back to School" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 5 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/back_to_school_3414>.
Discuss this script with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In