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Bad Asses Page #5
is Agent Brown...
- from the F.D.A.
- C.D.A. Health Commission.
We've been here all
of 15 minutes...
and we've discovered two
severe health code violations.
You wanna tell me how
you got in here?
Boy, don't worry
about how we got in.
If I were you, I'd worry about how
we shut this toxic shithole down.
Now go get your
supervisor for me.
And if I were you, I'd
show me a f***in' badge.
Mr. Brown, show him the badge.
What?
Just show it to him.
Badges? We don't need
no stinkin' badges.
What the hell type of answer was that?
I didn't know what to say!
It's called improvising. You'd better learn
how to do it 'fore you get us both killed.
You'd better learn
to shut your mouth!
Is that the kind of respect I get for
helpin' your ass? I don't need your help!
We give up!
So what time is
dinner being served?
I can't imagine it's
gonna be chicken.
Why have chicken...
when you Americans
love my fresh meat?
You gentlemen just
don't give up, do you?
That's commendable.
But I told you it
wouldn't stick.
Yeah, it's gonna stick.
Oh, you see, that's where
you are wrong, Mr. Vega.
I am what you might
call untouchable.
I can do whatever I want
in your pathetic country.
If I want to go 120 down
P.C.H., I can do that.
If I want to sell drugs to the
neighborhood, I can do that.
If I want to kill...
one of my dealers who's
stealing from me,
well,
you know I can do that.
So what you're saying...
is that you're just a
low-life drug dealer.
I'm an entrepreneur.
I'm building an
empire for my family,
just like your beloved Kennedys.
They made their millions
bootlegging alcohol.
I'm doing the same
thing, but with drugs.
Es lo mismo.
The only difference
is I'm above the law.
You see? Untouchable.
Now,
you and I have a little
score to settle.
Replace the inventory
you destroyed,
or pay me one-quarter
million dollars in damages.
Reach into my fanny pack
and get my checkbook.
Miabuelo had an old saying-.
"Un testiculo por un testiculo."
Now,
I know it's similar to the
"eye for an eye" thing,
but it's more graphic,
more relatable.
And besides, I just
like it better.
So...
in exchange for you
taking something from me,
I'm going to take
something from you.
Sound fair?
My people on the inside...
tell me you've become pretty
close with Manny Parkes' mom.
Yeah.
I find that very sweet.
I don't know what
you're talking about.
Oh, but you know exactly
what I'm talking about.
Leave her out of this.
She's got nothing to do with it.
She has everything
to do with this.
Just like clockwork.
Unfortunately, I must leave.
But I'm sure you'll find you're in
good hands with these two gentlemen.
Let's make it real
cozy for them, guys.
Drop it down to three degrees.
Caballeros.
I bid you adios.
"I love to hear the
wind, Patty says."
"And I love how things look beautiful
in the rain, says Alice."
"Well, I love snowflakes, says Jasmine."
"When I watch them float
around, I want to dance."
Did you just read that?
Yes, I did.
You, mi chica,
continue to amaze me.
Uh, stay here, honey. Okay?
Get the f*** up and check
the rest of the house!
Sh*t.
Christ!
Sh*t don't look good.
There's gotta be a way outta here.
Yeah.
Not until we freeze over and they slide
our asses out in one big ice cube.
Oww!
Yeah, that c-c-cold
hurts, don't it?
No.
I cut myself.
With what?
With Julia's bracelet.
Th-Th-The charms are
as sharp as razors.
Hey. Hey.
No!
You've made progress,
but still not enough.
You still want it?
Damn Mexican MacGyver!
Hang on, buddy. Hang on.
Hurry up, man.
My left nut is frostbit. Sh*t.
Okay, guy. Ready?
Oh, sh*t.
All right, man.
You got it. You got it.
Oh, sh*t. You all right?
Okay-Oh, sh...
Whoo.
It's just my fake hip.
Yeah. All right. I'm okay.
All right, let's go.
Out cold, b*tches.
Yeah. Come on. Let's go.
You made him wait? You a clever
Mexican, man!
Yeah, and you're
gonna pay, b*tch.
Hey, hey, you-you
taco-eatin' motherf...
I'm really sorry things ended up
the way they did, Senora Parkes.
Especially with your son.
But it's time for a new
chapter in your life.
I think you'll make somebody
very happy in Argentina.
Or the Middle East. I hear they
go crazy for Latinas. Who knew?
Julia! Julia!
Rosaria! Julia!
Julia!
Julia! Julia!
Help! Help! Help! Help!
Ooh. Oh, baby.
Oh-oh! Okay, okay. Okay, okay.
It's all right.
It's all right. It's okay.
It's okay.
I heard a few different voices.
They made a lot of
scary noises...
and took Mommy with them.
Don't worry, sweetheart.
We're gonna find your mommy.
They could be anywhere
by now, Frank.
You can always find
her on your phone.
What? Remember? Let me show you.
Oh!
That's right!
You're a good neighbor, Diane.
It's okay. Don't worry, Mr.
Vega.
She's in good hands.
Yeah, I know. Thank you so much.
You'll be all right.
Okay, sweetheart?
Please bring back my mommy.
I promise.
Come on.
Hey-hey! Hey!
What happened to the cab?
Are you kiddin'?
That was a $90 fare.
I couldn't afford to
keep it here any longer.
How we supposed to get there now?
I didn't see you-.
Someone call for a Bronco?
They're heading towards
the mountains.
Doesn't this thing
go any faster?
You're lucky this
thing even runs.
We f***in' hired the
dumbest people.
Sh*t!
Oh, you stupid motherf***er.
Vega and his f***in'
buddy got away.
We need to find them
before they find us,
and we gotta figure out what the
f*** we're gonna do with her.
Put Drake in the sky.
We getting close?
I can't tell.
There's three dots on the screen.
- I don't know which is which.
- Just pick one.
There they are!
Stay on their tail!
What the hell?
They got a
ghetto bird after us!
- Damn!
- Hold on.
I knew the four-wheel drive
would come in handy one day.
Sh*t! Where'd those
old bastards go?
D.M.V. don't know sh*t!
This boy's got mad skills!
Hold on, baby. We're goin' suicide!
Oh, sh*t!
Ain't no 20-year-old got
reflexes like that.
All right, let's see 'em follow
us through this. Oh, yeah.
Yeah! I think
we lost those a**holes!
Oh, sh*t!
Where the hell you get that?
Parting gift from
The Expendables.
Ah! Take that!
How you like us now, b*tch?
Did I ever tell you I really
like that fanny pack?
Mama always said, no driving like a
maniac 30 minutes after you eat.
- Here.
- Okay.
You all right?
I don't how much longer I got,
but if I'm gonna go out,
I'm gonna go out in style.
There they are.
I think they're on us. What?
Goddamn it!
This motherf***er won't stop!
Pull up next to him!
Come on! Go, go, go!
Shoot him!
Son of a b*tch! Sh*t.
Come on! Catch him!
- Come on! Catch up to him!
- I ain't gettin' my ass shot at again.
- I said catch 'em!
- You a mean son of a b*tch. You know that?
Sh*t!
Hey, you f***in' p*ssy! I got
a f***in' ice pick in my eye!
So suck it up and let's
get the hell out of here!
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"Bad Asses" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Aug. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/bad_asses_3434>.
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