Baggage Claim Page #4

in the morning from Atlanta to D.C.

You need to be at JFK in an hour

to catch the last

commuter flight out...

to make his morning

connecting flight.

You've now got...

sixty-nine...

I mean, fifty-nine minutes, honey.

You got fifty-nine minutes.

I'm looking for the b*tch, too!

B*tch, where are you!

Could this get any worse?

Hey, Montana, it's your mother.

Listen.

Sheree decided to have a

bridesmaid slumber party.

We're all here in our pajamas

and we want you to come over.

All right, sweetie, I love you.

Uh-uh!

You know you don't

need that cookie. Sit down.

This is your pilot speaking.

The flight time today

to Reagan International Airport

is 1 hour, 40 minutes.

Sit back and enjoy the short flight.

Sir, may I offer you a blanket?

No, thank you.

Montana.

Langston.

Montana.

Curtis. Hi.

- Would you like a blanket?

- I'm okay.

Hey!

Two of m y exes are on the plane.

I know about Langston.

Who's the other guy?

Curtis.

He and Langston are both here.

I'll get Sam.

Curtis is here, too.

You said he got married.

I thought he did, but I don't think

he is now. No wedding ring.

None of the married guys I

date wear wedding rings.

It's tacky.

Go with Langston. He's running for

Congress, so he needs a running mate.

Curtis.

Langston.

You know Montana?

Yeah, we're old friends.

Flight attendants,

prepare the cabin for takeoff

You know, I'm running

for Congress now.

And I'm having dinner tonight

with some potentially major...

campaign contributors.

Would you know a young lady.

Gorgeous, intelligent...

that would be so

gracious as to join me?

If asked, I might.

Consider yourself asked.

Consider yourself answered.

Right over here, this is me.

Wow. Langston,

you've done very well for yourself.

Thank you. This is probably my

favorite room in the house.

I can see why.

Oh, you have a dog!

Montana, this is Juicy.

Juicy, this is Montana.

She's so cute. Can I pet her?

Juicy. Stop that, shame on you.

I'm sorry. She's jealous.

She likes to mark her territory.

- Sorry about that.

- I understand.

If you were around more,

Juicy wouldn't have these problems.

So my being around

more often would be just for Juicy?

Yes, strictly for Juicy.

I hope it's okay... I had my assistant

pick you out something to wear.

I'm assuming your

size is the same as I remember.

I hope so.

It's hanging in the bathroom.

Two doors down to the left.

Great. Okay.

Bye, Juicy. We're going to be friends.

I certainly hope so.

See you shortly.

Juicy, pee.

God, I love that Juicy.

Montana, allow me to introduce

you to Howard Donaldson...

and his beautiful wife, Estelle.

Mr. Donaldson is the owner and

founder of Donaldson Steel...

the largest contractor

in the Washington metropolitan area.

And who might this

stunning young lady be?

She is too pretty to be your date.

You got that right.

This is Montana Moore,

my very significant other...

who was gracious enough to

fly here to join us for dinner.

Well, young lady, I hope you're

prepared to withstand the heat...

which this coming

election will surely bring.

Montana comes from a long line of

flame-retardant women.

She'll be just fine.

All right. I got a

great table, let's go.

Flame retardant.

He surprised me.

How you doing, sir?

May I take your drink order?

I'll have a scotch,

single-malt, on the rocks...

and a Shirley Temple

with extra cherries for my wife.

That sounds good. I'll have

what the gentleman's having.

The lady will also have a

Shirley Temple, extra cherries.

Oh, no, actually, I'd like a...

it's okay, I got it.

A Shirley Temple, please.

Actually, would you excuse us?

Lam dying to show Montana...

the breathtaking

view of the atrium.

Excuse us.

Sweetheart, listen.

These are the kind of contributors

who want to know the candidate

they're investing in is a leader.

A take-charge type of man.

Now, if I sit there

and let you order your own drink,

then that would be

like you're leading.

Please, just bear with me.

I promise, when this

thing is over...

I'll take you anywhere and you can

order for the entire restaurant.

But can you just do me this solid?

For me?

Of course.

- I'll do it for you.

- Thank you.

You look great tonight.

Langston?

Your record in

the city council is impeccable.

Well, thank you.

If you're not elected to

Congress, it won't be because of...

insufficient financial support.

I like that sound.

Mr. Donaldson.

I can't tell you how

much this means to me. Us.

There is no reason you can't

do something for your people.

You could do something really great.

Historic, maybe.

I mean, we're talking the Obamas.

The Williams sisters.

And like Tiger Woods.

Well, if, uh...

you're referring to

the American people...

then, yes, I have

every intention of

making the American

people very proud.

Well, I was thinking specifically

of your people, the black people.

Well, I live in

Georgetown, so I guess

these... these would be my people.

And Tiger Woods lives in Florida,

so those would be his people.

Are you saying that where

Tiger Woods lives...

makes him irrelevant to

people of the same skin color?

You'd first have to

determine Tiger Woods' skin color.

He's black.

Well, I think...

what would make

Tiger Woods black...

would be his

passion for things, uh, that...

are related to the

African-American race as a whole.

Which he has not yet proven to have.

What I think would make

Tiger Woods black...

is the fact he drives an Escalade

and his daddy's name is Earl.

An Escalade? Why...

A daddy named Earl?

It was a joke.

Things were getting heavy

and I was just trying to lighten them up.

Juicy, no!

This is Langston.

Good evening, sir.

Yes, she is quite the funny lady.

I'm sorry?

Of course, I accept.

Thank you again, sir.

Good night.

That was Mr. Donaldson.

He just doubled his contribution.

Apparently your little

Tiger Woods joke...

was the highlight

of his evening.

Juicy! Go pee.

Then the dinner was a success.

Langston, we should celebrate.

Okay.

Sweetheart.

You're so pretty.

There's a saying.

Behind every great man...

there is an even greater woman.

I want that for you.

I want you to be greater.

But sometimes being greater...

means being quiet.

Hmm.

I always thought the saying

was, Beside every great man...

Beside, behind, between...

it's all semantics. The point is...

that if she is

to be great, wherever she is...

she must follow.

And he must lead.

Well, when I led...

I got you twice as much money.

- It's not just about money.

- What is it about?

I'll tell you, Juicy.

I'm running for office.

Did you just call me "Juicy"?

- Did I?

- Yeah, you did.

Well, I apologize.

I don't know how I

could confuse you two,

because Juicy knows how to obey.

Juicy, come!

See that?

You know what?

"New actions, new outcome."

Same a**hole, same outcome.

You haven't changed a bit.

And I'm keeping the outfit and

the shoes. I earned them.

Get off, you little rat.

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