Baggage Claim Page #5

Juicy.

Juicy!

Hello?

Hey, it's me.

I didn't wake Taylor, did I?

No. Her grandma got sick,

so she went out of town to see her.

I'm sorry to hear that.

I hope she feels better.

- You doing anything?

- Not anymore.

Want to watch a movie?

Sure.

Great. Can you pick me up?

You live across the hall.

I'm not at home, silly.

I'm in Georgetown.

Hello?

William?

Hello?

Hello?

Sorry. I guess we got cut off.

No, I hung up.

Yeah, sure, of course.

I guess a 25-year

friendship doesn't give

me the right to call

you or expect you...

to drive less than an

hour when I'm stranded

at midnight in the crime

capital of the world.

Wait, stop, don't! I don't have any

money, or any real friends, either!

Stop!

So cold out there.

Yeah? Comfortable?

Why didn't you get one of your

friends to pick you up?

Oh, that's right. He

lives in Chicago.

Or was it Houston?

No, no, no. New York City, right?

I know this all seems

very silly to you.

I'm sorry you had a rough night.

It has been a very rough night.

God, it's cold in here.

Does "vintage" mean you don't

have any heat in this car?

I'm so cold.

Come sit next to me.

I'll keep you warm.

Thank you for coming.

You're welcome.

You give me hope that there's

still some good men out there.

Are you ever going to

finish this place?

- It'll be finished...

- When it's finished, I know.

I can't believe you're making me

watch a movie at two A.M.

On VHS.

All righty.

Our choices.

- Enter the Dragon.

- Uh-huh.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

Or The Last Dragon. Whoo!

You have Misery?

The Last Dragon?

There you go.

Get it started. I'll make us some drinks.

Mo?

What color in

the dining room? Cherry or Espresso?

Espresso.

Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

Wait. Is this our

high school yearbook?

Yeah. My mom was cleaning

the garage and found it.

I'm surprised your photo

didn't slide off the page.

You'd be walking around

with that activator...

Funny.

You must have forgot how you looked.

There wasn't a tube of gel in a

thousand miles that was safe.

Oh, my gosh. Look at our prom.

We were gettin' down.

No, I was getting dumped.

My date got jealous and left.

It's not my fault

she couldn't dance.

What was that song

we were dancing to?

I don't love her

I tried to tell myself

But you can see it in my eyes

So don't deny

I can't fool no one else

The truth is in the tears I cry

Cause if it isn't love

Why do I feel this way

Why does she stay on my mind

And if it isn't love

Why does it hurt so bad

Why does she stay on my mind

If it isn't love

Oh, my God.

I'll get us a drink.

This is for you.

- Thank you.

- Mmm-hmm.

Here we go.

This is a toast...

to us never dancing...

or dressing...

like that ever again.

Cheers.

Know what else my mom found?

Some DVD's? A couple romantic

comedies, hopefully?

Stop talking about a

black man's mama.

Remember this?

Please don't tell me

you still have that.

Paging Dr. William Wright.

If not for this, you wouldn't have

known you had a heartbeat.

You didn't know, either,

because you were

always trying to put

it on my booty.

You saying your booty

ain't got a heartbeat?

I don't think it does.

You don't?

Let me check.

Can you check it?

Oh, my God.

I can tell, young lady,

you're of African heritage.

Thank you.

I'm starting to hear something.

Be glad you know a doctor

who makes house calls.

Is that all you can make?

William...

Montana?

William?

Montana, we're here.

We sure are.

You still up for a movie?

Mo, you forgot...

She's always

forgetting something.

Ahh!

That was quite the dream you

were having, little girl.

You were sleeping so

peacefully, I decided

to clean that nasty

little kitchen of yours.

The way a woman keeps her kitchen

is the way she keeps her man.

I ought to know.

Mom...

in the interest of

me keeping my sanity...

I think we should establish

some clear-cut boundaries.

Boundaries.

After 74-and-a-half hours in labor,

struggling to give you life.

This is how you thank me?

Well, you're welcome.

And I am leaving.

Mom?

And do me a favor, Pig-pen.

That funky little attitude you got?

Don't bring that to

your sister's wedding.

We don't need it, okay?

Uh-huh.

Maybe I want to have a

funky little attitude.

Maybe because I'll have

someone of my own.

And I'm bringing

him to the rehearsal dinner.

What do you think about that?

Really, Montana?

You told your mother what?

I had to get her

off my back. You know how she is.

She got off your back, but a

10,000-pound gorilla jumped on.

You'll see.

- I'll see?

- You will.

- Montana.

- Weisha!

It's so good to see you.

Good to see you.

This is my good friend, William.

Hello.

For bridesmaid.

Again.

Try on.

Thank you, Weisha.

For the groom.

Try on.

Um, I'm not the groom.

But you're same size as groom.

Try on.

I need measurement.

This could have been you.

I proposed to you

and your answer was, "Eaugh!"

You proposed to me in elementary

school during recess...

"because you wanted my cupcake...

and the only way to get it...

was by giving me the toy ring

from your Cracker Jack box.

At least I offered

you a ring for it.

That's more than I can say for

the men you've dated since.

Touche. If I had known the

proposals would be so infrequent...

I would have accepted.

And then we'd be married.

Mo, you look amazing.

You don't look half bad yourself.

I have to get this.

Taylor.

How's your grandmother doing?

I miss you, too.

Got one... flight 1763 headed to

Houston, sitting in seat 3A.

Houston, we got a problem!

Move, move, move!

Feet can't touch the ground

And I can't hear a sound

But you just keep on

running up your mouth, yeah

Walk, walk on over there

'Cause I'm too fly to care

Oh, yeah

He's on his way to D.C. Right

there with my President.

This boy got some Frequent Flyer miles.

He's going to Miami.

Got another one, Sam,

on his way to Detroit. Motown!

Just one second.

One minute, please.

One second.

Don't let what they say

keep you up at night

And they can't detain you

'Cause wings are made to fly

And we don't let

nobody bring us down

No matter what you

say, it won't hurt me

Don't matter if I fall from the sky

These wings are made to fly

She like light-skinned dudes?

I got Leo DiCaprio up here.

Do her husband have to be a man?

Now is not the time to get

down on yourself, Montana.

In a week, maybe.

Thank you.

Don't mention it.

Ohh!

Taylor?

Montana. What a...

Ho-ho-ho.

Surprise?

How's your grandmother?

William is better looking.

And he's a great guy.

And she's here being a two-timing...

Whore.

- Montana.

- Taylor.

I know this looks really bad.

But what you don't know is

me and William broke up.

It's a long story. I'd appreciate

it if you don't mention it.

You know how it is when you break up.

The wound's still open.

Sure, yeah.

Thank you.

Could you get me a hot tea?

Two sugars, no cream.

Ciao!

Flight 901 is headed to New Mexico.

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