Ball & Chain

Hey, you got a safety pin?

Why would I have

a safety pin?

Oh, good God.

This is easy as hell.

Ready? One, two, three.

It's gone, ladies.

Where'd it go?

- That was so cool.

- Yeah, I know.

Hey, listen. I'm having

a party this weekend.

- Yeah?

- Yeah. You should come.

Hey, I need a pin.

Somebody have a pin?

Please?

What am I supposed

to do with this?

It's all I got.

People, people, people!

It's show time!

- Relax, Ameet.

- It happens to the best of us.

It didn't happen to you,

so shut up.

Oh, hey, Ameet, look.

I found a safety pin.

- You want it?

- It's not that funny, big boy

Don't count on me

for tomorrow.

Bobby's big day, huh?

I think it's pathetic.

I'd lose my pants any day

not to have to go through that.

Ruby Chandra, huh?

Yeah, why?

Poor you.

What's that supposed to mean?

You never exactly met her,

have you?

No. That's kind of the point.

What?

What's wrong with her?

What's wrong with her?

She's fine, man.

I don't know.

In a unique kind of way.

Go see what she looks like.

No

Come on, Ameet,

help a brother out.

No

Please?

Okay.

- Hi, Auntie.

- Hi, Ameet. How are you?

Hi, Uncle.

How are you?

Hi.

This is Ruby's mother.

This is Saima.

Isn't she beautiful?

Well?

Bobby? It's time.

Hi.

Hi.

Whew.

Hey.

Oh, hell no!

No!

Wait, wait, wait, wait

No

Sorry.

Whoa, whoa!

What the hell are you doing?

Did you see that thing?

She's a wildebeest!

Do you hear that sh*t? I can't

live with that the rest of my life.

- You got to go back and apologize.

- What?

I'm not saying you should marry her,

but you can't leave her like this.

Watch me.

I'm sorry.

I'll talk with him.

What the hell

is going on?

I got this under control.

You can just turn around.

I don't think so.

That's my best friend

down there crying like a baby.

- Wildebeest!

- Would you please leave?

Good idea.

I'm supposed to be

Sleeping Beauty!

- Hey, roll me out of here.

- No.

- Please? Please?

- No. No.

- Please?

- Shut up.

- Can you believe it?

- No.

Cheers

You idiot!

Saima, I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to...

Ameet, this is

the ladies' room.

Is there anything

I can do to help?

Yeah. Get out.

Are you sure there's

nothing I can do?

Get out!

- What's the matter with you?

- Mom.

- It's just a spilled drink.

- Did Ameet do this?

It was an accident.

On behalf of my son, please accept

my apologies.

- That's all right.

- That boy.

I don't know how he can survive

without a woman in his life.

What?

Okay, okay.

Yeah, hi.

Okay, okay.

Mommy!

Aah! Ow!

- Hurts?

- Yes!

So we got married.

I didn't get a honey

moon, of course.

I got a nurse.

Hi, honey.

Hi, honey!

- Yeah, hi.

- Hold this.

Oh!

All right.

Oh.

- Thank you.

- Poor baby.

Little chips for my honey.

You want some more of this?

Thank you.

My baby.

I can't believe Bobby

got trapped like that.

- See ya.

- Where are you going?

Out.

Don't be late.

- Where are you going?

- Out.

You should concentrate on

your studies.

It's Friday night.

After so much hard work.

You are in medical.

Why you want to ruin

that opportunity?

Papa, it's just one night.

Hey, you work now.

Tomorrow we are taking

dinner with some friends.

You also come.

It'll be your layer time.

You enjoy then

But, Papa, what about Dave?

Is he also taking

dinner tomorrow?

God bless you, God.

o]

[radi

Oh, God.

Damn!

Why are you

always in heat?

Because I know

what I want, girl.

Look at that ass.

What's up, ladies?

- Hey!

- Aah!

Hey, Saima.

What's with her?

What happened to you?

Hurricane Ameet.

Huh?

Where is everybody?

Hey.

No.

What's your problem?

You are.

Take it easy.

I would if youd stay away from me.

Why can't you just

leave me alone?

Can't you see,

I can't stand you.

I don't want you around me

and I'm sick of you

spilling sh*t all over me.

What?

Drink?

I found out where

everyone went.

They left.

What?

I can't find them,

and their cars are gone.

Great. And how am

I supposed to get home?

You...

I...

Tomorrow you're coming with us

You're going to take dinner

at a friend's place.

You be ready.

Come on, Deep.

You gotta play better

D if you want to win.

Play defense with your feet,

not like Bobby.

I wish Bobby

could play with us.

- He will... soon.

- When?

Four to six months

Why does he have to

be married anyway?

I don't know.

It was just his time, I guess.

- Does he love Ruby?

- It's complicated, Deep

- Love is just a part of it.

- What is love?

Well, um, love is...

Love is when two people

care for each other so much

that they'd be willing

to do anything for the other.

Is that how Bobby feels about Ruby?

Well, not yet,

but he will... soon.

When are you going to get married?

Ohh! Oh, God!

Ameet, are you okay?

- What happened?

- No!

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, I'm fine.

What are you doing here?

I don't know.

I guess our parents

hit it off at the wedding.

So, Ameet...

I hear you are doing

computer science.

Good profession.

Huh, Saima?

You know, Saima is doing medical.

I'm an intern.

Yes, yes, medical.

And...

Mom, I'm gonna go to my room

Excuse me.

Saima, why don't you go

see if Ameet needs anything?

Mm-hmm.

Go, go.

She is quite something.

I told you so.

Come in.

What do you want?

Papa wanted to know

if you needed anything.

Is it me, or are your parents

acting kind of strange?

Yeah, actually they have

been acting kind of funny.

What's with them, huh?

I mean, I didn't know

our parents knew each other,

and then Papa sends me in here

to check on you and...

They'd never allow me to be

alone with a guy unless...

Oh, my God!

Ow.

Where are you going?

I'm leaving.

That didn't exactly work

for Bobby,

and I don't think it's going to work

for you, not in your predicament.

Sh*t.

- I'm not ready to get married

- You? What about me?

I can't get married.

Not now and not to you.

Yeah!

Hey, what's wrong with marrying me?

Okay, wait.

There has got to be

an easy way out of this.

Our parents are

reasonable people.

We'll just explain to them that

we're not ready to get married.

How old are you?

I'm 25.

That's not going to work.

My father already thinks

I'm an old maid.

Well, we have to

try something.

Okay. Okay.

Calm.

Reasonable.

Rational.

Calm.

Reasonable.

Rational.

This is an excellent match

You are both getting

good education.

Dad, we don't want

to get married.

We're not ready.

I did not want to get married.

I was not ready.

- Huh?

- Mm-hmm.

But it- it all

worked out for the best.

But we don't love each other.

Forget about love. We don't even

like each other.

Why are you worrying

about love?

I did not have any love

when I married your mother

Ask her. Did I have?

No. But you will learn it.

You guys don't care about passion

or desire or any of that, do you?

You are thinking of

romance, sho-mance.

You are seeing films and all.

It is not like that.

- Hey.

- Hmm?

- Please explain to them.

- Let me tell you.

It's very simple. You get married.

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