Bana Bir Soygun Yaz

Synopsis: Onur is to go to Ankara for business, scalpels Hüso delivers a box of candy from a well-known pastry shops to be sent to a friend.
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Biray Dalkiran
Production: Cinemaster UK
 
IMDB:
4.9
Year:
2012
104 min
Website
15 Views


Hacamat brother comes.

Selamn aleykm brother Hacamat.

Ve aleykm selam we rahmetullah we bereket.

Selamn aleykm Polat.

Polat dear you wait outside for me.

Have fun.

Get outside I don't want

this boy to see what is

going to happen here next,

it would be a shame.

Now esteemed brothers, while there are so many

unbelievers in this market

you happened upon me a pious,

god fearing man of worship

and an honest man of trade.

Some subjects may spread rumors around

labeling us as yanda mafia

but we work hard to avoid

such labeling by sewing with due dilligence

and honest effort because our works

are out in the open for all to see Maallah.

As it says in the good book:

el ecerl mahlukat el ante kunteyul farat.

It means:

Mouse with a death wish spanks the cat on the ass.

Such a disgrace, have you spanked

anyone in the ass recently?

Nope.

Why are we even here?

Why did you kicked our asses?

I don't get it at all.

You ate my candy.

Candy?

What candy?

Believer Onur, since you are

going to Ankara anyhow

Can I ask you for a favor.

Of course brother.

I have to deliver a package to another

believer brother of mine

would you call him first when you reach there

and deliver it to him.

Then attend to your business in Ankara

in your own sweet time.

Don't even mention it. I will do it gladly.

May Allah be pleased with you vallahi and billahi.

Selim, bring the package boy. Right away.

It has address and phone number on

it call it when you arrive.

Okay.

Nothing will happen to the package

I presume godwilling.

God forbid.

What can happen to a box of candy

for god's sake, godforbid.

Bastard, A..hole

C'mon Leyla, what are you doing you are blaming

me for nothing you ever gain.

Leyla honey, c'mon don't make

a scene neighbours are watching.

You don't know what a scene is I'm coming down.

I know! What you looking at What!

What you all looking at.

Get inside She'll calm down after

blowing some steam.

What is this? What is this?

You bought a present for her?

You have my bread in your stomach

my money in your pockets

don't you fear god?

Leyla honey, What have I done

I would explain if I only knew.

Don't you dare lie to my face.

Wait till I catch that skank named Suzan.

You were going all to way to Ankara

to sleep with her didn't you?

Leyla dear calm down, easy everybody

is watching us, what are you doing?

Hey.

What are you doing?

Hey, enough, hey. Let everybody hear and know.

You drove me crazy.

You drove me crazy!

Get the hell out of my sight. Aww c'mon.

Get away, see I burned them, burned them all.

Don't ever show your face again.

Shame on you brother this doesn't become you.

So you wasted two fine chaps over a box of candy?

Shame on you heaten Onur, you stoop that low?

To a box of candy.

I will go and buy you 10 boxes from patisserie

...please don't do it

You rascal believer,

do you think I will fall for that?

Where is my money?

What money?

Money? The money in the candy box.

Who in his right mind would

put money in a candy box?

Why don't you deposit it in a bank?

Interest is illicit what to do with my money?

Brother Hacamat, forgive me if I may,

How much... money was there

in the candy box?

Fifty thousand euros.

Curse you Onur man has every right,

where is the money?

How can we now that there was money there?

Allah Allah, maybe there isn't any.

I did not see no money may god strike me down.

I didn't see anything.

It has been to long that Onur

rascal still did not call.

We used to fight like that before

but it never took this long for him to call.

Senem, can there be another woman in his life?

Let's assume he has one God forbid.

Is that the end of the world?

You are young, comely.

Look at yourself, get up get a grip.

Should I call? Don't act silly,

not now you let us go.

Here is a propositon dear brother.

If I don't bring you 60K Euros

I am an inglorious bastard.

You already are one,

shut up.

Thank god, what is happening.

He had some wind

there was a man on gallows

when the hangmen placed the noose

around his neck, he asks him:

Do you have a last wish?

A blessed man

he replies:
may god save me from worst.

Amen.

Hangman is a heaten he laughs and says, in a minute

I will kick the stool under you

you will hang and die What worse can happen?

The blessed man says don't talk like that.

Mr. hangman every bad has its worse.

Just that instant a horseman comes galloping.

And says to the hangmen loose the noose

around the convict. Death by hanging is abolished.

We will stake the culprits from now on.

As it says in the good book: meftal bil hayr,

if it is death let it be a good one.

Hope for the best you give the order

...And Selim will bust a cap in my skull, end it

...so I may know peace.

A hundred! A hundred?

A hundred thousand euros

and 1 month time what say you?

What is there to say now Onur the faithful.

A muslim should believe a muslim in the end.

Elhamdlillah.

Elhamdlillah,we are all believers.

Praise god.

Now Hadi we have read your script.

If you want my opinion,

I say you forget this comedy business.

Mr Daver, this is absurd comedy

it makes fun of personages.

Tries to create comedy out of

nonsensical situations.

The whole world laughs at absurd comedy.

Well I don't Hadi I really don't,

what are we gonna do?

Don't you have a romantic movie?

Romantic movie? Yep.

That is piss easy Here.

Love story truly original.

You don't say?

What you say?

I ll produce it for 1.5 it makes 16.

We sell it to the channel for 1 it makes 17.

Pay per View, DVD another 500,

to a total of 17,5

minus the tax, 4,5

we can change the apartment

we can change the car,

change the jeep

change the boat and Hseyin will fix us

the receipts and books we can make 18 thousand liras

from this project, there done let's shake hands.

If I like it, I will give 1000 to script.

Ohh Hadi, hope it is good news at this hour.

It will be good news Sevda

you got the leading role.

I don't believe it

You wrote me a leading role?

I have even met with the producer.

What did he say?

He has no quarrels about you

we can even say he liked you.

Wait a minute, you are not just

tantalizing me with empty promises I hope.

Hadi you will burn in the deepest pits of hell.

You hear me?

Now bye bye.

You are a piece of work angel

of death flies over our head

and you can still lie like that!

Who am I talking to?

What the hell?

What is the matter with you?

Hacamat is my matter.

Why you making such a fuss of it eto

so you made a witless mistake,

so what it will be solved eventually.

What witlesness are you talking about

I have not seen any money

nor have I eaten any candy

and look at what happened to me.

Like I have seen anything

I will elbow your face.

Relax guys, easy this Hacamat

...Hacamat or whatever is just a human being

you will go and talk like adults

and tell him "we can't pay this money"

it is beyond us, and it is settled.

If you can't talk to him

I will go and talk in your stead.

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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