Band of Robbers

1

You don't know me...

unless you know

about me and Tom Sawyer,

where we've been,

what we've done together.

Huckleberry!

You'll respect your father, boy.

- Meow!

- Where do you think you're going?

Huck, get your ass back in here!

Meow!

Tom was the

closest thing to real family I had.

He saw a world where we were

just one adventure away

from all our problems

disappearing forever.

When we get the treasure, you won't

have to live with your dad anymore.

You can live wherever you want.

All right?

I care about you.

Seemed that every second

he was dreaming up

some new plan for us.

But the grandaddy of them all

was finding Murrel's treasure.

I probably don't

have to tell you

that John Andrews Murrel

was a notorious bandit.

Legend had it

that before Murrel died,

he hid his fortune

somewhere in town,

leaving clues to its location.

But to this day,

no one's found it.

Tom figured he was

a lot like Murrel,

so it was only natural that he'd

be the one to find the treasure.

Takes a pirate to think

like another pirate.

To Tom, trespassing

and other laws

didn't apply

to treasure hunters.

Ours was a special code.

The truth is, we weren't

the only ones looking.

Didn't really matter to me

that our adventures never came out right.

Hey! Stop!

Tom!

- Huck!

- Tom!

With Tom, there was always

something great just ahead,

a dream to hold on to,

even if it seemed

there was only more bad coming.

No, I'll take him upstairs.

It was a dream worth pursuing,

time after time.

I suppose to a stranger's eyes,

Tom and I may seem worlds apart now.

We may be in different places,

but things

aren't that different.

Where do you see yourself in the

next five years, Mr., uh, Finn?

Well, sir, I, uh...

I guess I see myself

getting a good job.

How would you describe your work

on the police force in one word?

Great. In the heat of battle.

The local hero.

The loc... Great in battle.

Battle-tested.

- One word, Tom.

- Hero.

Hero.

Policeman.

You would describe your work

as "policeman."

Um, I don't know.

Um...

Maybe a family?

Never had that.

Hard to have a family

when you're imprisoned.

That's why I'm never

coming back here again.

Make me a detective.

No.

Sid's a detective,

and he's an idiot.

Nice way to talk about your brother.

Half-brother.

Lieutenant. Uh, sorry.

Shepherdson flipped.

- Nice work, Sid.

- Thank you.

If you'll excuse us, Tom.

Write tickets. Do your job.

After so many

years of chasing the fairy tale,

most people would be ready

to give up.

But Tom Sawyer

isn't most people.

Hey, Tom.

Huckleberry Finn.

Left the lights on for ya.

Brings back memories.

Ah, sh*t. You know, it's supposed

to look like fireworks, you know.

Like... Huck's back.

You're a cop.

Oh, yeah.

Figured if, uh,

Sid got to have a gun, I should too.

So... Hey, thanks for not saying

anything about me in there, man.

Appreciate that.

I got you something.

Huh?

Figured you probably didn't get

too much of this stuff inside.

I ate some of the pie,

but there's till over half left, so...

You staying with the widow?

Yeah. For now.

Yeah. Cool, man.

Things are gonna be different this time.

I guarantee it.

I'll get more into that later at your big

party... We got a party planned for you.

Okay. Yeah, man.

You and me.

Huckleberry Finn and Tom Sawyer, buddy.

Just you wait.

Come on.

Look at this guy.

It's good to see you.

You too, man.

Let's get outta here.

Put that sh*t

behind you. Right?

Oh, you gotta ride in the back.

Sorry. It's protocol.

Right.

Watch your head.

You're under arrest.

Just doesn't seem to matter,

knowing there's a time

you gotta let go,

gotta grow up.

Some things never change.

Even when they probably should.

I'm not ashamed of you.

Dear God,

please help this shameful,

poor, lost lamb

to find his way.

Set him on your path.

Forgive him his mistakes.

Amen.

I feel like that worked.

Thank you.

Well, you can sleep here as long

as you stay on the straight path.

If you gonna get a job,

you're gonna have to look civilized.

Okay.

There you are.

How was the job search?

Pretty good.

Jorge, I need you

to come back tomorrow

and trim the branches

on the maple out back.

I'm saying that the walkway out back is being

blocked and it can't just stay that way.

How do they not know English?

Meow! Meow. Meow!

- Meow.

- Meow!

Hope you're ready

to party, buddy.

Oh, you know what? I forgot.

This is a... This is a surprise party.

So...

Okay.

Yeah.

Act surprised, okay?

It'd just make the guys feel great.

I got it.

Okay. Great.

Sh*t.

It does that.

Oh, hey, Amy.

Hi.

Nice... shirt.

So, Barnes downstairs?

Alone?

Cool.

We'll go look.

Excuse us.

Oh, no.

God, it's so dark.

I bet there's nobody down here at all.

Surprise!

Just kidding.

We got him.

We got him.

We got him.

- Turn on the AC.

- The AC doesn't work down here. Can I talk to you?

- Are you doing laundry right now?

- You're out of underwear.

How's prison?

Bad, right?

Open up a window. There's no window, Tom.

It's a basement. A man cave.

Sounds pretty weird.

Whatever. Let's do this.

Okay, we're gonna get this

Huckleberry Finn welcome-back party

up on its feet

in three, two, one...

Then they broke up.

Yeah.

Oh, Huck, I almost forgot.

I got you a little

welcome-back present.

Oh. Still selling

these things online.

And, uh, business

is going really well.

This is my newest model,

and I thought you might like it.

"My other car is Jesus."

"My other car is Jesus."

You should make another one that says

"My other car is fishing."

Fishing is super-popular.

We weren't supposed to bring gifts...

And I got him pie earlier, so...

We're all glad to have Huck back, right?

That's why we're here.

To believe in that,

to celebrate that.

This is a party, okay?

Welcome back, Huck, right?

This is for you, man.

Whoo! Huck!

And it's a meeting.

So let's start the meeting.

I know what you guys

are thinking.

Huck's been in jail. I don't wanna have

anything to do with that stuff. Neither do I.

But I don't think Huck's done anything

wrong. And that's coming from a cop.

You know what other cops do? They write

tickets to your own grandmothers.

They let real criminals get

away with whatever they want.

They make the wrong people

into detectives.

You know... The point is,

they have no perspective.

They have no imagination.

And that's what

brings us to now.

An opportunity

has presented itself

to make real criminals pay

while we, the good guys,

get a little payday...

a big payday for ourselves.

So, if you're with me,

the way I see it,

this marks

the first meeting of...

the Band of Robbers.

Okay, robbers, Tom?

Think of it like this.

Robin Hood and his merry men.

Robbing from the rich,

giving to the poor, keeping some money.

Keeping the money. You know?

I wrote up an oath...

- We're bad guys?

- No, we're heroes.

Sounds like bad guys.

When you steal from criminals,

it makes stealing more of a

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