Barnyard Page #2

Synopsis: When the farmer's away, all the animals play, and sing, and dance. Eventually, though, someone has to step in and run things, a responsibility that ends up going to Otis, a carefree cow.
Director(s): Steve Oedekerk
Production: Paramount Pictures
  3 nominations.
 
IMDB:
5.6
Metacritic:
42
Rotten Tomatoes:
22%
PG
Year:
2006
90 min
$72,601,713
Website
6,471 Views


No, that's just me,

the contortion mouse.

C!

X!

N!

- Q!

- Oh, man, you're killing me, dude.

Look, I just wanted to welcome you

to the barnyard.

I'm sure that you and your...

Not looking. The key word, "not".

Work with me. Not looking.

This is my friend, Bessy.

Yeah, she's a cupcake.

- It was nice to meet you, Otis.

- Yeah, too you.

You know what? Switch those.

Oh, boy.

There's nothing for you there,

but I kind of like her friend.

He's out!

All clear! Sweet!

Now, every heifer, every cow

Hold tight to your udders now

Farmer Brown is bedding down

Let's turn this barn into funky town

Chickens on the left

Dance with your neighbor

Hogs, don't slobber on the pool table

Hogs, don't slobber on the pool table

Try to go easy on the manure

It's a dance floor, not a sewer

Here we go, do-si-do

Here we go, do-si-do

Put this thing on hot!

Better hold on tight

When we go hitting the hay

You better hold on tight and pray

You better hold on tight

When we go hitting the hay

Darling, you better run

'Cause I won't hold back them horses

Hitting the hay

We'll go hitting the hay

We will rumble and tumble

Night and day

Here we go again

Come grab your friend

Shake him up, shake him down

Try to get a good blend

Here we go, do-si-do

Here we go

- First you hold on tight

- Hold on tight

- Then you dance all night

- Dance all night

Hit the hay!

Better hold on tight

When we go hitting the hay

You better hold on tight and pray

You better hold on tight

When we go hitting the hay

Hitting the hay

We'll go hitting the hay

We will rumble and tumble

Night and day

We'll go hitting the hay

We'll go hitting the hay

With our backsides shaking

We'll go hitting the hay

Wow! This is amazing.

What you looking at?

What? You want some of this?

Oh, yeah, I didn't think so.

Sit right here, honey.

The flowers are beautiful.

See? On time, just like I...

Right.

Cramp! That's a cramp!

Oh, it's cramping!

And release.

- Hello, Son.

- Dad,

I've been thinking,

and I'm willing to accept your apology.

- Really?

- Sure. I mean, it's only right. I mean...

Okay.

I don't mean to let you down, Pop.

I'm just out trying to have some fun.

It's a beautiful night.

I remember when I used to

sit out here with your sister.

- I don't have a sister.

- Oh, yeah.

That was you, wasn't it?

Thank you, all right.

So, are we okay?

- We're okay.

- Great.

See, 'cause I wanted

to ask you something.

My friends are all going

to the barn tonight,

and not that it matters either way to me,

but evidently, I'm needed.

I'm a sort of an integral part

of a musical number.

Yeah, I tried to tell them no, you know?

But they were just so...

I told them, "My dad's not gonna

wanna cover my shift.

"I mean, it's my shift, not his.

It isn't his!" You know?

"I don't want to be selfish.

What's mine is mine, and..."

What do you think?

Otis...

I never thought

I was gonna amount to much.

I certainly didn't think

I'd be in charge of anything.

But that all changed one day.

It was the day you showed up.

I head out into the meadow

and I see this little baby calf all alone,

stumbling around.

You know,

before you became a nightmare.

Well, I took you home that night,

and I know it doesn't sound possible,

but I looked up into the sky

and I would have swore

I saw the stars dance.

At that moment,

I knew my place was here,

taking care of things.

I guess you helped me realize that.

I love you, Son.

- You still want to go, don't you?

- Yeah, I really do.

Not that your stuff... You know, the stuff

you're saying isn't nifty and everything...

No one says "nifty".

I say "nifty." I do, and sometimes

even "swifty." I'll say that.

Very impressive.

Go ahead, have fun. I'll cover your shift.

Thanks, Pop. You're the best.

- Otis?

- Yeah?

Be the stronger man.

Yeah. Yeah, that's

that saying thing, right?

"A strong man stands up for himself.

"A stronger man can

bridge the gap between..."

Got it locked in the vault.

See? I learn.

Mr. Boombastic

What you want is a boombastic

Romantic, fantastic lover

She call me Mr. Boombastic

Say me fantastic

Touch me in me back

She says I'm Mr. Romantic

Call me fantastic

Touch me in me back

She says I'm Mr. Ro...

Smooth

Who's here? Moo! It's me! Moo!

Whassup? Milk me!

Hey, babe.

My barn. That's right, my barn.

You're late. Come on.

He's a real winner, that one.

Oh, stop. I think he's kind of cute.

Lay down in my Jacuzzi

and get some bubble bath

Only sound you will hear

is the beating of my heart

And we will mmm-mmm

And have some sweet pillow talk

I'm Boombastic, really fantastic

Mr. Boom Boom Boom Boom

Give it up for the one and only,

Biggy Cheese!

We're gonna have some fun

tonight, y'all.

Hey, Buck.

Get your hooves off the stage.

You ain't in show business.

What, were you raised in a barn?

Well, you're a good horse. Okay...

What you looking at, Turkey?

Somebody pass me

the cranberry sauce.

Dead turkey walking.

We all gonna die,

but we don't know the date.

We know your date, Thanksgiving!

Okay, to kick things off tonight,

I got a special treat.

Back by popular demand.

Ladies, this one's for you.

Our own Otis and the Crew!

Well, down on the farm

Where they all ask for you

Parties all hours of the night.

What is that farmer up to?

You know what?

- I'm gonna call someone.

- Oh, leave him be.

Well, I'll just call whoever I want,

whenever I want to.

That's exactly what I'll do.

Because I know

what a rave is, Mr. Lump.

"I'm going to sit and watch TV

and be a lump."

Okay, Mr. Lumpy. It's just not right.

They all ask for you

They all ask for you

Down on the farm

They all ask for you

I'll check it.

It's all right. Calm down.

It's just the pizza guy.

I'm on it.

Watch out. I got it. I got it.

Pizza, pizza, pizza.

Thanks. You want change?

No, keep it.

So, you really ordered a lot of pizzas.

Well, yes.

We're having a big human party.

Just a party. A big one.

With us celebrating our humanness.

- Dude, I love parties! Can I...

- No.

Okay. Well, then, I'll see you.

Ouch!

My arm fell off.

My fake arm, I mean.

Wow, I am so sorry about that.

- Do you need any help?

- No, I don't like help.

It's just against my religion.

I'm a Nohelpian.

Cool, I'm a Lutheran.

What about this?

You know what? You keep it.

It's dirty now.

Really? All right.

Dude, I got a arm!

Yeah! Righteous!

Well, I won't back down

No, I won't back down

You can stand me up

at the gates of hell

But I won't back down

Gonna stand my ground

Won't be turned around

And I'll keep this world

from dragging me down

Gonna stand my ground

Good evening, ladies.

Sorry to call on you

so late in the evening,

but we did have a previous engagement.

Now, we're gonna take six of you.

Anyone makes a sound,

we don't mind the extra company.

Boys, take your pick.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Steve Oedekerk

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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