Basmati Blues Page #3

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from everything.

Shri insists you go riding,

so...

Oh.

Well, I used to love to ride.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

I mean, you could come too.

But first...

After we get

the farmers on board.

-[Linda] Right.

- You know what?

You should meet their kids.

One...

Two...

Oh, I'm sorry.

Are we interrupting?

No, no. Please come in.

Oh, um... It's an emergency

at the Ministry.

I'm sorry, I have to go.

I'll see you later.

Girls... [claps] Go practice.

I'm Sita. And you're Linda.

The beautiful American

who's replacing the drunk,

adultering salesman.

Wow, word really gets around.

We call it the Rice Paddy Radio.

You're new here, so you're

coming to my family's house

-for dinner tonight.

- Cool.

-[girl] Yeah, you now.

- Oh. Oh, no, no, no.

[music plays]

Hands in position.

One, two...

This is it. One.

Two.

[Rajit's father]

Our son is a scientist too.

[mother]

Rajit always did experiments.

He was always top of his class.

He researches

agricultural sustainability.

Impressive.

I can't wait to meet him.

He's considered an expert

on stinkweed.

[Linda] Wow.

[mother]

Such a diligent student.

[father] Raj.

That's him?!

That's the monkey hunter.

Traditional family greeting.

'[9l'unts]

-[clattering]

Real mature, Rajit.

That was pretty funny.

[chuckles] Well, you know,

we met once before.

On the train? I was on the roof.

You gave me the last tea.

From the Northeast.

[laughter]

How did you end up coming here?

- Do you eat cows?

- Are you married?

- No. Who has time for that?

-[laughter]

Not that it-- That it's always--

She's taking time to think and

become more of her own person.

[boy] Rajit is single though.

[girl] Yeah, Sima ran up to

Delhi to be a cosmetologist.

Yeah, and that was a win-win.

That marriage was arranged

by the gods!

But you young people

with your commitment anxiety...

[mocking]

...and your narcissism.

- So, Rajit, you're a student?

- Yes.

Well, he's working on his degree

in Agricultural Science.

-[boy] Not anymore.

- I'm taking a sabbatical.

- You know how it is.

-[chuckles] Absolutely.

Reboot.

Come back with fresh eyes.

YES.

[Linda]

a Oh, hard times a'

Come again no more a'

Oh, hard times

Come again no more a'

That's a very sad story.

-[Sita] Mm.

- But true.

You can keep the guitar.

-[Linda] Oh, I couldn't.

- Yeah.

Some hippie left it

many years ago.

It's just lost that...

patchouli smell.

[Rajit] The British

stole the silverware,

that's why we eat

with our hands.

[Linda laughs]

So, how does a scientist

get into seed sales?

I don't know.

- They sang me a song.

- Oh, yeah?

Yeah.

I think you're really gonna

like it here, doctor.

Hey.

Welcome to my office.

-[Linda] It's very roomy.

- Mm-hm.

You must be very important.

Oh, very-

[Rajit]

And then the stem-borers.

They're like the piranhas

of the paddies.

Yes, they can eat twice

their weight in six hours.

I have nightmares

about those guys.

But you know there is a ferbacia

that can kill it.

Hedysarum geranus.

That is my sixth favorite weed.

- Wow, that is so weird.

- Yeah.

I never met anybody

who likes weeds.

What an unexpected night.

[horn honks]

-[Rajit chuckles]

- That's Aman. My ride.

- Of course.

- Mm-hm.

It was nice... re-meeting you.

[laughs]

You should stop by my lab.

I'll show you my rice.

- Okay-

- Okay-.

[family shouts] Bye, Linda!

[laughs]

Bye.

[bird squawks]

Ta-da!

Ooh!

Luckily, I have no end

to my self-esteem.

Don't move!

Turns out I do have an end

to my self-esteem.

[sighs]

I have negative air pressure

to keep the foreign pollens out.

But those were pretty.

Exora cocinea?

Of course.

Exora cocinea.

- I'm a gentleman, you know.

-[laughs]

You should join me tonight.

Farmers are gonna be here

in an hour.

No slides! I wish I had

some experience teaching.

I'm supposed to win back

their hearts and minds.

What does that even mean?

Hmm. Wouldn't it be more poetic

if it was in a circle?

You know, the endless

cycle of life kind of thing?

- Would you care to join me?

- T-shirts!

Um... you know what?

I'll come back.

Bye.

Oh, thanks for the flowers.

You're welcome.

- Rajit.

- Billy.

Scoring off those bananas.

Nice outfit.

[Rajit chuckles]

Have a good day.

I brought you local bananas.

Put these on.

This is a sterile lab.

And get the musa

acuminata out of here.

It's a sub-species, first of

all, and they're really sweet.

Please put this on

or go outside.

Oh, my God, are you serious?

You know your rice is going to

have to grow outside.

It's called Mother Nature,

there's flowers.

People walk around barefoot,

it's beautiful.

- You don't know what I'm doing.

- I know.

That's why I'm here.

You invited me, remember?

Wow. So this is what an American

rice paddy looks like.

How come the life cycles are in

a line, not a circle?

- I like when it's in a circle.

- Because this one's not.

[chuckles] I'm sorry.

I'm just-- I'm exasperated.

Don't worry, India does that

to all newcomers.

Uh-uh. I'm pretty sure

it's just you.

- Oh, yeah?

- Mm-hm.

Okay, well, then consider these

apology bananas.

They can be a sub-species

of apology banana.

Outside.

[father outside] Rajit!

Rajit, work!

Okay, but I'm gonna come back

to further my education.

- Okay.

- Okay, and I'll leave these--

- Don't leave them here!

- I know, I know.

Have a good day. That's a really

cute hat. We match.

[chuckles]

Raj.

- Okay, bye.

[father]

You're in avoidance mode.

[men murmuring]

So Rice Nine,

it's different because--

Did you really hit

our town elder?

Uh, it was a misunderstanding.

[men chatter

in foreign language]

It was just a tap.

What makes it different--

Drought resistant,

pest resistant,

vitamins,

nine percent more protein.

We even know the jingle.

Oh.

a' Rice Number Nine r

It's made by design... 4'

Yeah, I brought my microscope--

But your slides were ruined.

So we heard.

On Rice Paddy Radio.

- So nothing to show now.

-[murmuring]

Yeah.

I don't know why I'm here.

I should...

be in the lab with my dad.

[speaks foreign language]

Uh, Rajit's father told us

your vulnerability would evoke

our paternal instincts.

Jeffries never even

spoke with us.

And you went to a farmer's house

and had a meal.

And you give us these nice hats

and slippers.

[all chuckle]

Hey, you know what is cool

under a microscope?

A human hair.

Cw!

I'll show you.

Tfaliuhglis]

I'm intrigued.

[Rajit] What we're talking about

is natural management.

That means planting more

of my stinkweed,

-and planting further apart.

- Ah.

Plant less plants.

That does sound natural.

- For a lazy man.

-[laughs]

What else?

Should we get more sleep?

Mogil's got it all figured out

with Rice Nine.

Even the stem beetles.

Rice Nine is armored

with a protective sheath.

What is this Rice Nine?

You really should have come to

Dr. Linda's class this morning.

This is her rice?

Don't you talk

to your girlfriend?

Hey, she's not my girlfriend,

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