Be Kind Rewind Page #9

...toteach you a lesson.

Mr. Fletcher,

this is really hurting my arm, okay?

Listen, I apologize, okay?

- Good, good.

- I... I will follow the new rules.

Good. But more importantly...

...you should never

threaten your auntie again.

She works very hard

to keep a roof over your head.

And these guys...

...are working very hard to save ours.

- You get my drift?

- Yeah, I got it.

Thank you for the lesson.

Sounds like Fats Waller's

back in the house.

It's... It's his house.

Now, my boy, do you know where

our Fats...

... did record most of his tunes

and why?

- I know that one.

- I'm not sure.

- I know the answer.

- Mike?

At RC A Studios in Camden.

They liked to drive there on the train on the

way to the studio so they can get drunk.

Sometimes they didn't

even get to the studio...

... because they would get in a fight

or they'd get arrested.

Mr. Fletcher, I don't really see

the connection with my lesson.

There is none.

We changed the subject.

Set up the cameras over there.

We wanna get in the red car

to do a little make-out session.

We're walking in the rain.

It's kind of warm and fuzzy, and I kiss you.

And we're like young lovers.

Wow, these guys are good.

They can shoot any style.

We cast Jack and his friends.

- Whatever, man.

- You hear what he's saying, man?

Yo, see. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Come on.

You want some of this, buddy?

I'm shooting him.

Oh, no. Derek!

Why?

Look at the pool of blood around him.

He's with Jesus.

What's happening to our 'hood?

It's no good.

It's senseless, the violence.

Kids, I have to admit...

... I was wrong.

To movies with heart.

- And soul.

- I remember the sandwiches too.

- We had pig ears.

- Just look at Mr. Fletcher there.

- Pig ears and white bread.

- I smell elephant.

You're the number one hunter

in the world.

When you see that elephant,

you know that you have to kill it.

- That's great. We did it.

- And cut.

Now we're like animals.

I love you, I love you.

I'm having sex with you.

We're nearly there. One more week.

"Jerry and Alma in..."

"Jerry and Alma in..."

Jerry and Alma, Jerry and Alma,

Jerry and Alma.

Are you jealous or something?

No. No, I'm not.

Forget about what I even said.

Don't... I'm sorry.

Well... Well, really. I mean...

... how come he's always

the one with you in the movies?

It's always him.

Well, Jerry said

that you complained about my...

That is a dirty lie.

I never said a word about your mustache.

I didn't say anything about it.

I never said my mustache.

Okay, so Jerry was telling the truth.

And that's why you never wanted

to kiss me or anything.

No, no. I never complained about that.

Mike, I never said the word,

and you did.

So how would you know, huh?

Because he complains about it

all the time, to tell you the truth.

What's the difference?

- You think I have one, right?

- No. Really, to be perfectly honest...

... I don't even think you have one.

- I wish I was dead right now.

Just really quick. Let me see.

You know what? I don't see anything.

- I don't see anything.

- You don't see it?

No.

Thanks.

Maybe I should give you a blind test.

Yeah, I think we need a blind test.

So?

Hey! You're trying to kiss me.

- Why not?

- "Why not"?

- Are you in love with me?

- Huh?

Mm-hm.

Well, how do I know that?

You know you're in love

with a person...

...when you talk to them for a minimum

of 20 minutes a day in your head.

What if I talk to a guy in my head

for 20 minutes? What would that mean?

You're in love with Jerry.

- Huh? Ew, no. We're closed.

- Yes, you are in love with Jerry.

- No, I'm not.

- Hey, Mike, you hear the door?

Not at all. No, that's not... It c...

Listen, it could be anybody.

- Mr. T, Fats.

- You are in love with him.

- I know it.

- Mr. Elroy Fletcher.

Yes.

To whom it may concern...

...copyright infringement is punishable

by state and federal law.

Now, I hold in my hand a restraining order

from Trenton...

...and, actually, a warrant of seizure

from Washington D.C.

- So you, the defendant...

- What's up?

... have declined to attend

the judgment proceedings...

...so the studios are coordinating

to assess...

...the damages from...

How many titles is it?

- Approximately 200.

- Okay. So...

Oh, what do we have here?

- A record of rental.

- Oh.

- What?

- Two hundred titles times...

... how many average viewings?

Sixty-three times per tape.

Times 250,000 maximum in damages...

...and/or up to five years in prison...

...per offense.

- Which adds up to...

...3.15 billion dollars in fines...

...which would need to be paid back

to the studios...

- I'll write you a check.

...and/or...

...63,000 years in prison.

Which, of course, would have to be served

before you could reopen the store.

But we made the movies ourselves.

- They're our...

- And people like them.

You're... You're right. But technically,

you're wrong. You see, these tapes...

...belong to the studios.

Look, it's written.

FBI warning, right there.

It's at the beginning of the tape

as well.

- But we erased that, so...

- I think it's...

People come here because

they want to see these movies.

That's why they come here. They're not

interested in those formulaic big movies.

They're not interested in them.

They don't wanna see them.

Sir. Sir.

Taste has nothing to do with this.

Don't listen to them.

Mr. Fletcher, you can kick them out.

- The entire film industry is crumbling...

- They're trespassing.

...because of pirates and bootleggers.

And we intend to stop it.

Right now, right here.

We're not selling boots,

and we're not... We're not pirates.

- And we don't have viruses.

- I'm sorry, Mr...

- Fletcher.

- Mr. Fletcher.

I mean, look.

I have a family too, okay?

I didn't say I do. I mean,

what has this got to do about a family?

Nevertheless,

this writ gives us permission...

...to destroy all your black-market tapes

by the end of the day...

...and all of these assets

in the store...

...are hereby seized

to pay these penalties to the studios.

No, no, no. These are... No, no, no.

Not the...

We just want to get in and out...

...as painlessly as possible.

- Those are Sweded!

Hey, let him go.

Mr. Fletcher?

Mr. Fletcher.

I could save the building.

I got a plan B.

This is a application to make it

a historical landmark.

I can't believe

that I didn't remember it before.

It's gonna be easy,

because Fats was born here.

No, Mike, it's not so simple.

Why not?

You can go get his birth certificate.

The address has got to be on the birth

certificate. Go check the public records.

No, Mike,

we can't provide any documents...

...to prove that Fats lived here.

You wanna know why?

Huh? You wanna know why?

- Because...

- No, no.

- No, no, listen.

- I don't wanna...

Now you don't want

to finish my sentences, huh?

Boy, look here. I'll finish it.

We can't prove

Fats Waller lived here...

...because he never did.

I think you should come one more time.

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