Beautiful Thing Page #5

-That's cool, it's no problem.

Well, it is a problem actually, Tony,

don't pander to her

-What's going on?

-Rose?!

I saw a video about Woodstock once.

Leah, get in here and

turn your bloody music down!

-Oh my God! Tony!

-Leah, what the...

-Bloody hell, Leah!

-Tony, get her down! Tony!

Leah. Leah, have you taken a trip,

you know?

-Get down, you silly cow.

-Sandra!!

'Ere, body language, Tony!

-Oi!! You!! Pack it in, will ya!

-Oi!! Arsehole!! F*** off!!

-There's no need for that y'arl hewer!!

-Oh, Jamie, help us!

-Betty, it's them again!

-I can see that.

Right?

-How am I supposed to sleep with that row going on?

-It's all right, babes, you're safe.

-Oh, I'll be glad to get off this bloody estate.

-What?

-I've been offered a job

if you must know.

Temporary licensee in a pub in Rotherhithe.

Nice little flat above it.

Thanks for telling me.

Snap!

-Leah?!

-Oh, leave the silly cow.

We can't just...

Tony! Tony!

Right, Jamie indoors.

Ste, she knows.

-Me mum knows.

-Oh why d'you have to go and grass?

-I never!

-Well, how comes she knows?

Because she never came down

with the last shower.

Jamie, get 'im a hanky.

There's a box of autumnal shades by me bed.

Leah!!

Mama Cass!!

I don't believe in secrets.

I like people to be

straight up and honest.

But I'm not fool.

D'you think I want these flats infamous for child murder?

No. So I won't be telling your dad.

He'd kill me.

-Yeah, I just said that.

-No, he would!

Yeah, I think we've established that

already actually, Ste!

-They all would! All of them!

-I'll bloody kill you in a minute if you don't stop sniveling and shut up!

You're a good lad.

And that's what counts.

And...somewhere..

-you'll find people that won't wanna kill you.

-No I won't.

-Well, you've found the Gloucester.

-I hate it.

-Well, somewhere else then, shut up.

-There aint nowhere else.

There is actually, Ste.

There's an island in the Mediterranean

called Lesbian,

and all its inhabitants are dykes.

So, I think you got your eye wiped there.

Now wipe 'em properly.

-F*** me.

-No, we'll have none of that here.

I'm going to bed.

Five minutes.

Right, Sandra. Night, Sandra. Cheers, Sandra.

Yeah, that's me name, Ste,

don't wear it out, eh?

-I wished I was the one that was going away.

-Nothing ever happens round here.

I gets up in the morning,

bake me face in half a ton o'slap,

tong me hair with yesterday's lacquer.

And that's it.

It's the same every bleeding day.

There's f*** all to look forward to.

-What 'bout your new school?

-Fell through.

-D'you wanna come to the Gloucester?

-Do what?

Gay pub.

-Don't know any gay blokes.

-Yes you do.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

-There'd be plenty o'men.

-Yeah.

And they all dance backwards

and never get married.

See, I told you.

You're going Woolwich, intya?

-What?

-Yeah.

-Pub crawl then Stars Nightclub.

-You'll pull dressed like that.

Why don't you come down

to the Gloucester with us?

-Ring the other girls and tell 'em you'll meet 'em later.

-Jamie!

You don't know how to enjoy yourselves,

do you?

There's a male stripper on tonight as well.

-Louise.

-Yeah?

I will never have grandchildren.

Ah.

-Don't suppose you've got any jobs in your new pub?

-No.

But if I ever do turn it into a brothel,

I'll get back to you, okay?

Well...gotta get in.

Get ready.

I'm going out with Ste and Jamie tonight.

-The Gloucester?

-Yeah. I intend to find meself a nice dyke tonight.

Coz I'm telling you,

I'm through with men.

-Well, if I had a camera now.

-What?

-Well, I'd take your picture.

-Tony. What are you doing?

-Can't keep away from you, babes.

-I told you I was going out with the girls from work.

-Thought I could tag along.

-It's a girls' night out, you'll only be bored.

-I want to celebrate too.

-Yeah, I know, but I told you.

They'd mind?

I'll mind.

How about one little kiss to send me on my way.

Something to think of till tomorrow.

Stop it.

Well, I'll ring you.

-Tony.

-Look, when's your next night off?

No.

No. Tony.

I think you better go.

'Ere, stick that down the chute for us,

will ya?

-What you doing?

-Staying in.

-Laters.

-Yeah.

You'll be seduced by a lesbian, Leah.

You'll be seduced by a lesbian, Leah.

Why don't you come the bingo with me?

But don't you see, Mum?

I am a lesbian!

Oh no!

-Anyone about?

-Nah.

Dance with me.

'Ere, Leah.

Gizza little drag on that.

Come on then.

-'Ere, Ste!

-What?

Imagine your dad's face!

-'Ere, Leah.

-What?

-What's this dyke gonna be like?

-Ooh, big and butch.

-What color eyes?

-Green.

-Tall?

-I'll have to look up.

-Nice.

-Yeah.

Yeah.

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