Bedknobs and Broomsticks Page #7

l must get a train

back to London tonight.

lt's rather an important matter.

l'd like to tell you about it,

but it's a little bit hush-hush.

Sort of a secret.

Well... if...

lf l've been any sort of help to you,

l'm pleased.

You've been immensely kind.

Thank you.

l've enjoyed being with you.

Perhaps it's been good for all of us.

Will you be coming back?

Some day, my dear. l certainly hope

that we shall meet again.

Some day.

When all this war business is over.

- l see.

- Perhaps l shall realise my dream.

Eglantine and Emelius:

illusionists extraordinary!

Just think how that

will look on the poster.

The children are going to miss you.

- You really think they will?

- Yes.

Well, l shall miss you. All of you.

lf l don't go now

you might never get rid of me.

Goodbye, Carrie.

- Must you really go?

- l think it's best for everybody.

- Goodbye, Paul.

- l think you should be our father.

Goodbye, Charlie.

Do you want me to come down

to the station with you?

No, no. You stay here

and look after everybody.

- Goodbye, Miss Price.

- Goodbye, Mr Browne.

- When is the next train to London?

- Lord bless ye, ain't no train.

Not until milk job,

- Mind if l await it here?

- Suit yourself. Good night, sir.

Good night.

Out you go, Cosmic.

Hello?

Emelius Browne, do you know

you could be warm and cosy

in that house at this very moment?

For once in your useless life,

you really seem to have been needed.

You're a failure, Emelius Browne,

and a coward.

No, Frulein, this is not

the invasion, just a little exercise.

A minor raid to induce panic

and to spread a little mischief.

When you English get it

through your head

that the German forces can land

whenever and wherever we please,

perhaps you will consider

reasonable peace.

Not bloody likely!

Go on, Miss Price. Do it to him.

l must say, it's very tempting.

Colonel, how would you feel

about being turned into a white rabbit?

l said, how would you feel

about being turned into a white rabbit?

Be quiet, please.

Filigree, apogee, epogee...

- Not again!

- Your memory, Miss Price.

Would you kindly fetch my notebook

from the workroom?

Righto.

Silence!

We have work to do.

l am sorry, but l must send

all of you some place

where you will no longer

be a nuisance.

As the words sell the tune

And the moonbeams the moon

All I need to succeed in my plan

Is a champion rare

with a flourish and a flair

Eglantine!

Where's the spell for rabbits?

The easiest of all, she said.

Confound it, can't women ever learn

to file things properly?

Here it is.

Filigree, apogee, pedigree, perigee.

That's it.

Filigree...

apogee, pedigree, perigee.

Come along. For once in your life,

you've got to believe in something.

That's it. Good lad.

Filigree, apogee, pedigree, perigee.

What's the use of putting us

in that draughty castle?

lt's quite chilly.

The colonel believes when a British

female decides to become a nuisance,

she can become

the greatest nuisance in the world,

and l'm inclined to agree with him.

You need a lesson in manners.

lf l had my notebook,

l'd make certain you'd learn a few.

Jumping Jehosophat! More Jerries!

Take it easy, can't you?

- Try holding your breath.

- l am holding it.

We could strip him down

and grease him with soap.

No, it's no good. We can't do it.

l could have told you that

in the first place.

lf we can't get Paul out we'll just

have to think of something else.

What about that spell

that makes things move about?

- But l'd need weapons.

- How about all these things?

l'm afraid they're a bit ancient.

- Where did this come from?

- lt's Mr Browne!

He's on his way to London.

Mr Browne?

lf you are Mr Browne,

would you get off my lap?

lt is Mr Browne!

lt is you!

You didn't think

that l could do that spell, did you?

l am glad to see you!

But what about all these Germans?

What's wrong with

the substitutiary locomotion spell?

- That ought to be useful.

- lt isn't ready yet.

- You saw what happened.

- We have to chance it.

We can't let these so-and-sos

get away with their beastly little raid.

Won't you get up off the floor?

We'll go to work.

- Jolly good luck, my dear.

- Thank you.

Let's hope you haven't

forgotten the spell.

- Not this time.

- Found this in the castle.

Probably not magic,

but it might make you feel more at home.

Thank you.

That was very thoughtful of you.

Let's get out of Miss Price's way.

Treguna...

mekoides...

trecorum...

satis dee.

Look!

Sound the advance!

Just in time for the kick-off.

Steady on the left.

Victory for England and St George!

Like a Lord Mayor's show!

Pikemen, hold your distance.

Treguna mekoides

and trecorum satis dee

Blimey!

- Where's it coming from?

- Sounds like the sea road, sir.

Come on, lads! After me.

Good shooting, bowmen!

Well caught, sir. Very good.

Knock his block off! That's it!

Mr Browne,

make those children take cover!

Are you still there, Colonel?

l thought you'd be on your way by now.

You see? Things may not

be so easy for you after all.

Goodbye, Colonel!

Eglantine.

Dear Mr Browne.

- We thought they'd damaged you.

- See? No one can hurt Miss Price.

There they are, lads!

l said something was afoot!

All right. Drive them into the sea.

Firing positions. Both sides.

All right, men. Hold your fire.

l think we've taught

the Hun a lesson.

He'll think twice

before coming back here again.

lt's tragic. All your spells,

your equipment. All gone.

Still, l was able to perform

some small service first.

That mean you ain't gonna

be a witch no more? Never?

No, Paul. l realised some time ago

that l could never be a proper witch.

Was it that first magic moment

when you laid eyes on me?

No. lt was the day

my poisoned dragon's liver arrived.

l knew that anyone who felt the way

l did about poisoned dragon's liver

had no business being a witch.

- Certain you're doing the right thing?

- Well, l think so.

lt's much too dangerous

being a civilian.

Take care of yourself, guv.

l'll do that. And l'll be back

before you've grown an inch taller.

- We'll be together again.

- Sounds like you have an escort.

Well, here we go.

- Permission to move off, sir.

- Carry on, sergeant.

Parade, by the right,

quick march!

Suppose that's it.

We ain't gonna have no fun no more.

Still got this, ain't l?

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