Bedtime Stories Page #9

"With my niece and my nephew."

"To a kid, everything about a

hotel is strange and wonderful."

"Sleeping in a different bed."

"Hanging out in the lobby."

"Jumping up and down on the alligator."

[Grunts]

"Riding up and down in the elevator."

[All] Ah!

Sorry. Yeah, I see now

that an alligator

wouldn't be in that context.

"Some hotels try to make it seem

as much like home as possible."

"But they're missing

the point."

"If you wanted to stay in a place

like home, then why not stay at home?"

"Our guests should experience

an escape from the everyday."

"And that's what I'd like to capture

in our new hotel."

"What every kid knows

and what every adult has forgotten."

"Like my father said to me,

your fun is only limited

by your imagination."

- That was beautiful.

- Yeah? All right. Settle down.

Just the way it built.

And that's it? I'm sorry.

I don't understand it.

That... was... brilliant!

Congratulations, my boy.

You've just won the keys to the kingdom.

[Grunts]

[Whimpers]

Boogie, don't do that. Germs.

Congratulations. Great job.

Keep icing that tongue.

- All right.

- Congratulations, Skeeter.

- Congratulations. That was great.

- Yeah?

[Imitates gibberish]

That's just terrific.

Congratulations, Skeeter.

All right, Kendall.

Yeah. No hard feelings, pal.

Of course not. You deserve it.

You're a better man than me.

- You have an iron will.

- Yeah. That's what they say.

I would not have the guts to tear down

the school my niece and nephew attend.

What?

You do know that's the site

for the new hotel?

What are you talking about?

- Good show, old son.

- Oh, sir.

That bee sting language was really

working for you on a sympathetic level.

Good, I'm glad. I wanted to talk to you

about the location

that we're building the hotel.

[All] Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

[drums beating]

[All exclaiming]

Bronson, you're fired!

Fired?

Oh...

That's how it connects.

[Bell rings]

Yes?

Do you know where

Jill Hastings' class is?

It's right over there.

Why won't you answer my calls?

Because I know it's you calling.

You got to believe me, Jill.

I had no idea...

Don't destroy the sliver of respect

I have for you by making lame excuses.

Just go away and stay away.

Uncle Skeeter? Do you want

to incinertate our school

'cause we incinertated you in the story?

No, I wouldn't do that.

We thought you were

supposed to be the good guy.

So did I.

"Skeeto defeats Kendallo."

- Not really.

- [Knocking]

- Yeah?

- Hey.

Oh, hey.

Welcome back.

So, you mad at me, too?

Not as mad as Jill,

but, uh, mad, yes.

I didn't know the new hotel

was going up there.

I figured that.

Then what are you mad at?

I gave the kids junk food?

No, I figured you'd do that too.

I'm mad because you told my kids

that in real life

there are no happy endings.

Well, look around you, Wendy.

Do you see any happy endings here?

I don't know. You and Dad always had

so much fun in this room.

For whatever reason, I didn't.

I was always the cynic,

the, the sourpuss.

[Skeeter] The black cloud.

The energy drainer.

The... dead fish.

Yes, all of those things.

But when I left Bobbi

and Patrick with you,

I guess I just was hoping

you'd rub off on them.

Get them to be lighter.

Have fun. Enjoy themselves.

I thought Dad would like that.

Anyway, um, I got a job in Arizona.

Teaching, not principaling.

That's cool.

Yeah, well, maybe you can come

visit when we get settled.

I know by then the kids

will really want to see you.

All right. Love you.

Love you.

[Marty] And so Skeeter sat on his bed,

filled with regret,

wondering how to put the pieces

of his life together

after one magical week.

- Great ending, huh?

- [Marty] That was your ending, son?

I thought this was just a sad part,

and you were about to make it better.

What? How could I make it any better?

Well, In the stories I told you,

just when things looked bleakest,

the hero would do something

unexpected and courageous

to beat the bad guy,

save the day, and get the girl!

Yeah. How can I do that?

It's your story, not mine.

But you better get moving.

Go get 'em, son.

Mr. Nottingham! Mr. Nottingham?

I was wondering if I could

talk to you for a moment.

My name is Jill Hastings.

I'm a teacher at Webster Elementary.

[All chanting] Save our school!

Save our school!

Save our school!

Save our school!

Save our school!

Save our school!

My men are in position.

We are ready for the demolition.

Excellent.

Mr. Nottingham said he'd call

if he had a problem

getting the variance,

so if we don't hear from him

in the next 20 minutes,

I say we just... blow it all up.

[Chanting continues]

Madam, the war is over.

You lost. I'm sorry.

This isn't a war, Mr. Nottingham.

We're talking about children.

There must be other possible

sites for your hotel complex

that would not result

in the displacement...

Hey, hey! Barry, Jill.

How you doing?

We're just wrapping up here.

Donna, you remember Jill, right?

Of course! Oh, my God.

That jacket is so cute!

Uh, thank you.

Bronson, what are you doing here?

What am I doing here?

Yeah, what am I doing here?

Oh, uh, well, Mr. Bronson,

as a concerned citizen,

wanted to bring points to my attention

before I made any hasty

decisions about the property.

And they are points that are going

to take me years to analyze.

- Years?

- Years.

Bronson, are you

playing hardball with me?

I am, sir.

Because your application

for variance has been...

Denied.

Denied?

Yes. But the good news is

Donna and I found you

another piece of property

right on the beach in Santa Monica

that is uptight and out of sight.

Beachfront was my first choice,

but it's not for sale.

It is now.

It is! Isn't that fabulous?

Really?

Friends?

Oh, oh. [stammers]

Yeah, well, germs.

Let's get past that.

Come here. Come here.

No, no, no, no, no.

I'm touching you,

and it's OK. Look at that.

Aw...

Ooh. You're enjoying it.

Good. Bring me closer.

That is so sweet. And creepy.

[Chanting]

Attention, please,

ladies and gentlemen.

We are working with highly-sensitive,

dangerous radio-controlled explosives.

[All] Boo!

And so to avoid any tragic misfires,

I would ask that you all

turn off your cell phones.

All of you, please.

Turn your cell phones off.

Did you really just fix everything?

Not everything.

[Clears throat]

- Yes?

- We appear to have a situation.

I can't reach Kendall on his cell phone

to halt the demolition

which will begin in... 13 minutes.

[Patrick] This sign we made

is awesome!

[Bobbi] We need a window where

those construction guys can see it.

Then they'll change their minds.

Bobbi, I found one.

[Jill] That's my Prius!

- OK. Where's your truck?

- My truck?

I had to give it back to the hotel.

What do you mean

you gave it back to the hotel?

Come here!

Come here!

- [Motorcycle revs]

- [Skeeter] Sorry!

It's for a good cause!

Have you ever driven a motorcycle?

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