Beetlejuice Page #23

CATHY rides up to the house on her bicycle. She weaves her way

with difficulty through the workmen. She takes the pack off her

back, and removes the mail that she's brought from the post

office.

INT:
LIVING ROOM AND FOYER -- DAY

CATHY comes in the front door. Just as much pandeominum inside.

Caterers, people rearranging the furniture, DELIA is there with a

torch and mask, putting final touches on her water clock.

CATHY:

I brought the mail.

DELIA:

Have you put out the

guest towels yet?

CATHY:

I was going to do it

right now.

DELIA is looking through the mail as CATHY starts up the stairs.

DELIA:

Remember, folded in quarters,

creases to the left.

DELIA comes across a letter that puts the fear of God in her.

DELIA:

CHARLES!

CHARLES is at that moment coming out of the kitchen, through the

dining room.

DELIA hands the letter to him.

DELIA:

It's from the IRS.

Without a word, CHARLES tears into the letter.

DELIA:

It's an audit, isn't it?

CHARLES:

Yes.

DELIA:

Call the accountant on

Monday. He'll take care

of it.

DELIA leaves.

CHARLES:

(To himself) No. I'll call

him right now. This is --

An insinuating voice sounds behind CHARLES.

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

It's a little late for

that, Mr. Deetz.

BEETLE JUICE is standing there, in the guise of the IRS man we

saw in the steam room.

CHARLES:

Who are you?

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

My name is Irving Roger Smith.

He points the monogram on his briefcase: IRS.

CHARLES:

(With misgiving) But what

are you doing here?

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

Look at your notice, Mr.

Deetz. Our appointment is

for today.

CHARLES:

But you have to give warning

for an audit.

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

Look at the envelope. That

notice was mailed four weeks

ago. Because we didn't hear

from you, we concluded that

the appointment was confirmed.

CHARLES:

But I just got the notice

today.

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

That's between you and the USPS,

Mr. Deetz.

CHARLES:

In case you haven't noticed,

we're giving a little party

tonight, Mr. Smith.

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

The first think I need to see

is every bank statement and

deposit receipt for the past

three years.

INT:
CATHY'S ROOM -- DAY

CATHY and BARBARA are folding towels.

BARBARA:

This is going to be some

party isn't it? Is it going

to be a cookout?

CATHY:

No, but there's going to

be twenty-seven different

kinds of raw fish.

(Diffidently) Have you

decided what you're going to

do tonight? Mom wants you to

make sure it's something

really special.

BARBARA:

(Uncomfortable) Adam and

I have figured out a few

things.

CATHY:

I'm really glad you're doing

this. I think it will help.

Also, it'll be nice to have

some of my friends at the

party.

BARBARA:

(Too quickly) Why don't stay

upstairs with us tonight? We'll

have our own little party.

CATHY:

I can't really. Besides,

you guys --

A CHAIN SAW --

interrupts their conversation. BARBARA and CATHY exchange

glances and go to the window.

THEIR POV --

WORKMEN are hewing down ADAM's orchard in order to erect a

massive striped tent.

INT:
UPSTAIRS HALLWAY -- DAY

CHARLES is leading BEETLE JUICE / IRS down the hill, towards his

study. CHARLES moves like a convict going to execution.

CATHY hurtles out of her room and throws herself on CHARLES.

CATHY:

Daddy! Daddy! They're

cutting down the orchard.

CHARLES:

Not now, Cathy.

CATHY:

It has to be now. They're --

CHARLES:

NOT NOW!

He and BEETLE JUICE / IRS move on. At the door of the study

BEETLE JUICE / IRS turns and smiles at CATHY.

INT:
ATTIC -- DAY

ADAM is lying on the floor, looking out a window. He is weeping

at the loss of his orchard.

He gets up, looks at BARBARA.

ADAM:

I don't care what he

does to those people

tonight.

INT:
LIVING ROOM -- DAY

CATHY and DELIA are in the middle of a heated argument.

DELIA:

Cathy, we've got a

hundred and thirty-five

people coming to this

house in a matter of

hours. Don't come at

me with this bullshit

about trees.

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