Beetlejuice Page #28

CHARLES is speechless with horror.

BEETLE JUICE / IRS

And Mr. Deetz, this is what I

think of your Schedule W.

He sends a PILE-DRIVING FIST into CHARLES's stomach, doubling him

over, then slams the door in CHARLES's face.

CHARLES:

Oh God...

Still doubled over, with the Long Island teas churning ominously

in his bellow, CHARLES lurches down the hallway.

At that moment, EVELYN comes up the stairs, with a very

distinguished looking elderly gentleman.

EVELYN:

Oh here you are, Charles.

I'd like you to meet the

editor-in-chief of Ballantine

Books. He's very interested

in your ghosts.

CHARLES makes a feeble attempt to straighten up. It is too much

for his stomach.

By the WRETCHING SOUNDS and shocked expression on the publisher's

face, it is obvious that CHARLES has just thrown up on the

publisher.

INT:
BATHROOM -- NIGHT

LYDIA is just about finished with her make-up when CHARLES

staggers in, looking like a man who's just lost both his lunch

and his meal-ticket. From the way LYDIA's nose crinkles, it's

obvious he smells like five pitchers of half-digested Long Island

iced teas.

LYDIA:

Eeeeoooouuu. Gross.

She gets up and goes out.

INT:
HALLWAY -- NIGHT

LYDIA exits the bathroom just as BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH pulls

the door of CHARLES's study shut behind him.

BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH

I've been looking for you.

LYDIA:

You have to meet my family.

I've told them all about you.

BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH

There's plenty of time for that

later.

He pulls LYDIA into her own bedroom and slams the door.

INT:
SCULPTURE BARN -- NIGHT

DELIA and EVELYN are having words.

EVELYN:

I don't know if I can pull

this one out of the fire.

Why did you let Charles

start drinking like that?

DELIA:

The reason he started

drinking today is that he

was worried about the IRS

man upstairs. And the

reason he's worried about

him is because of those

tax scams you're always

talking him into.

EVELYN:

Those tax shelters

allowed him to afford this

white elephant of a house

you talked him into buying.

DELIA:

It was our idea to move

to Connecticut. And we love

living here, and we love

this house. And we both

love being a hundred miles

away from you.

We pull back to see a group of about twenty guests, with glasses

and plates of food, standing in a circle around the two women,

not at all trying to disguise their interest and enjoyment in the

fight.

OTHO breaks through the circle of spectators, and speaks to

DELIA.

OTHO:

Everyone is enjoying this

immeasurably, Delia, but

you've only got half an hour

to get ready for your ghosts.

I think you'd better make an

announcement.

EVELYN:

Your friends in the attic

better make this good, or

no one will ever accept one

of your invitations again.

DELIA:

Eat my shorts, Evelyn.

OTHO and DELIA go off in close conference.

INT:
LYDIA'S ROOM -- NIGHT

LYDIA is showing BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH the photographs on

her wall. They include the photographs of the ghosts, and also

other macabre subjects. As they move around the room, BEETLE

JUICE / DANNY DEATH keeps touching LYDIA knowingly, and despite

the sophistication of LYDIA's photographs, she is a very nervous

sixteen-year-old girl.

LYDIA points out a photograph of a mummified corpse.

LYDIA:

I took this series in the

catacombs in Guanajuanto.

Delia wouldn't even go

inside, but I'm not afraid

of stuff like that.

BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH leans over and gives her a kiss on her

neck. At the same time, he's pushing her down against her desk.

BEETLE JUICE / DANNY DEATH

What are you afraid of?

Just as she's about to be pushed all the way back, LYDIA suddenly

wriggles out of his grasp, and grabs a large photograph album.

LYDIA:

And these are great, too.

INT:
THE ATTIC -- NIGHT

ADAM, CATHY, and BARBARA have been playing cards. ADAM is now

putting up the decks.

CATHY:

I really do have to go

downstairs now.

BARBARA:

Stay just a little

longer.

CATHY:

I can't. Anyway, you

have to get ready to get

down, too. What are you

going to do for the guests?

ADAM:

(Vaguely) Ah, we thought

we'd move some furniture.

Knock off people's hats.

You know, that kind of thing.

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