Best in Sex: 2017 AVN Awards Page #3
- Year:
- 2017
- 710 Views
an Asian girl come?
Sometimes she sounds like
a f***ing baby baboon, like,
"Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh."
She's not Asian?
She's Chinese?
- Indian?
- Latina.
I don't give a sh*t
about you, shut up.
You know what I'm talking about?
I'm kidding. What is she?
What are you, beautiful?
I'm Latina!
You're Latina?
Oh, you, oh!
You got that hair from your
p*ssy to your belly button?
You know what I'm talking about?
Hola, Papi. Hola, Papi.
I had my first threesome with
a Hispanic girl, I really did.
I did.
It was kind of like a threesome.
Her little kid was in the room.
But listen...
F*** you, AVN.
I just started. F*** you.
We're having fun tonight.
You're beautiful, by the way.
You're absolutely beautiful.
I wish you the best.
- Thank you.
- Seriously, I wish you the best.
I'm sexy.
Thank you so much, beautiful.
I appreciate it.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Thank you so much.
I gotta say this right here, and
then I'm gonna get things going.
I gotta say this.
You guys, you get a lot of sh*t
sometimes for what you do.
And I gotta say this, honestly,
you guys do exactly
what you wanna do
with your life,
and that's f***ing respect,
and I wanna say that
before I get it going.
100%.
And I mean that. You really do.
So I wanna get things going.
You guys ready for the best
awards yet, or what?
I want some more energy.
Are you guys ready
for the best awards?
Come on!
That's what I'm talking about.
We got a great night tonight.
We really do, so let's
get this started.
Behind every great man,
they say there's a great woman,
but tonight we got two
f***ing amazing women behind me.
Put your hands together,
everybody, and please welcome
Riley Reid and Aspen Rae.
Come on, let them hear it!
Let them hear it!
- Hello, beautiful people.
- Hey, everyone.
cohosting this year's awards.
We're happy to say that
for the fourth year in a row,
our aerial coverage
is being provided
by the Fleshlight blimp cam.
Wave, everybody!
Hi!
So when I was asked to be
a part of this year's show,
- I had one big condition.
- Ooh, can I guess it?
- Sure.
- All right, mm,
- a huge bubble bath?
- No.
Let's see,
a fivehour massage?
- No.
- Fine, getting DP'd
by midgets
while watching cartoons
and eating out of
a chocolate fountain.
- You know me so well.
- Yeah, I follow your Twitter.
Oh, sweet.
Now here's two people
definitely worth following.
Presenting Best Actor,
please give a loud round
of applause for...
Kat Dior and Ariana Marie.
When writing the recipe
for how you make a Best Actor,
you need the following.
Start with a great cock.
Then sprinkle in some charisma.
Drop in a big helping
of talent,
and whisk in some passion.
Lastly, add a ton of patience
to put up with
all of us crazy actresses.
Then put him on the screen,
and serve him up.
Here are the nominees
for Best Actor.
Can you play with these
nipples a little bit?
But it's much, much bigger
than yours.
Miss Hudson, right?
What amazing little bangers.
Mama!
Preacher's pretty
pissed off, huh?
What do you think about that?
I'm the one doing
the motherfucking talking here,
you see?
You hear me?
There we go.
It's not other women, baby.
Another woman with us.
Let's do it.
Let's get away for the weekend
and focus on us.
Will you go?
Oh, hello, room service.
Please send up a gallon
of your best poison lipstick.
Shiny and pristine,
until you make that first stab.
Stab, stab, stab, stab, stab!
Woke up at 5:
00 in the morning.From 5:
00 to 9:00,I read the Constitution
of the United States of America.
I didn't want to say
what she said,
but what she said was,
"Senator, you're a p*ssy."
And the winner
for Best Actor is...
Xander Corvus!
"The Preacher's Daughter,"
Wicked Pictures.
Whoo!
Congratulations.
Oh, wow. Thanks.
Thank you. Oh, wow.
Wow, all right.
Thank you, everybody.
Uh, wow.
Once again, um, I wanna thank
everybody from Wicked
that put this movie together.
Brad, thanks
for casting me, man.
Thanks for writing
an amazing movie as well.
Yeah!
and everything.
Thank you, guys.
OC Modeling, hell yeah.
My beautiful girlfriend,
Lily Lane.
Thank you guys so much.
Thank you, AVN!
All right, guys.
Thank you so much.
Y'all are so awesome.
I'll see you next time.
Bye.
And cut.
That was perfect, Bailey.
- It was super authentic.
- Carrots?
Get the f*** out of here
with the f***ing carrots.
Let's start from the top.
My name is Linda Wilson.
I'm a cam show director.
I've been in the industry
about 17 months strong now.
I'm what they call a veteran.
If you want something done
right, go to Linda Wilson.
I'm ready.
Let's roll.
- Cookies?
- Patrick!
A lot of people say,
"How is this a thing?"
Or, "Cam shows
don't need directors,"
or "Linda, pay me back
the money you owe me."
You go ahead and you ask Bailey.
She'll tell you.
I mean, you could take
the lampshade off.
You get better punctuation
with the light.
You need good light penetration,
you know what I mean?
I mean, you can get one girl
that she's got maybe one,
maybe two lamps.
That looks really good.
Lighting, it's all about
the lighting.
Oh, that's it, yeah.
I see some of these shows,
and I'm like, "Hey,
the only thing getting
blown out is your face."
'Cause the lighting's so bad.
That's it.
I don't know much
about lighting, but I know
I made 10,000 bucks last week
showing my tits.
Food is the most important
thing you can have on set.
And despite what my...
b*tch of a sister Linda thinks,
people like having food on set.
Patrick, shut the f*** up!
Yeah, sometimes
I get yelled at,
but I wanna make sure
the hummus and the veggies
are ready to be eaten.
Veggie medley?
Nice tits.
I don't know what any of these
people are doing in my bedroom.
Patrick, are you
still f***ing here?
I am crucial
to this production!
AVN salutes the heroes
of the adult film world.
Girls, it's been great
working with you both,
but I have a few questions.
Okay, what's up?
Do we really get paid
in AVN gift cards?
Wait, we're getting paid?
Yeah, I thought this was
community service.
Okay, I guess
my other question is,
are we really sharing
a room tonight?
- Wait, what?
- Yes, that's true.
Uh, and I call the middle!
Great, I'll bring
my gift cards.
Perfect.
For the category
of Best Supporting Actress
and Best Oral Sex Scene,
the presenters are...
2016 Penthouse
Pet of the Year, Kenna James,
along with Gia Paige
and comedian Doug Benson!
Love you, Doug!
Hey, everybody.
As everyone knows,
I'm a huge fan of movies.
It's great to have you here.
I didn't know you loved
our movies too.
Well, with your movies,
a few minutes here,
a few minutes there,
and I'm good.
- That's all I need.
- Just like our
supporting actresses, they may
not be in the whole movie,
but they'll definitely
give you the few minutes
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"Best in Sex: 2017 AVN Awards" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2025. Web. 18 Jan. 2025. <https://www.scripts.com/script/best_in_sex:_2017_avn_awards_3935>.
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