Big Business Page #2

Well, take a purge.

I'm just gonna throw myself

into your work. Who was that?

A heavy breather

with intestinal woe.

- Oh, dear. Paw prints.

- Look, I'm fed up with you.

You're a senior vice president...

and the window washer knows more

about this company than you do.

You're so wispy, wispy, wispy.

Why can't you focus?

- I'm going to.

- And these weird attacks

of domesticity.

- Where do they come from?

- I don't know.

You're going to have to see

Dr Sullivan, I insist.

As soon as possible.

- He didn't stop you

from getting married.

- That was a brief girlish fiasco.

Well, uh, this, uh, fiasco would

like to have a few words with you.

- I tried to tell him.

- Hi, Michael.

What are you doing here?

I'm going into a board meeting.

Well, that's certainly

more important than your son.

Yo, Ma. It's me, Sly.

It's your day with him.

You're not dumping him on me

five minutes before a board meeting.

I am not dumping him on you.

I just want to know

the meaning of this.

- He said you gave it to him.

- I did.

- Do you mind telling me why?

- He earned it.

How?

A hundred dollars for every C,

two hundred dollars for every B...

You pay our child to learn?

Why not?

Let's just call it a, a perk.

You're out of your mind! You're

raising a child, not a, not a CEO.

Well, perhaps I'll raise both.

I got you. I got you.

Oh, all right. All right.

I'll take the money back

if you'll just get him out of here.

Hey, that's my money!

Mine!

Spoken like a true Shelton.

Jason!

Come along, Rose.

L-I don't even know

what's on the agenda.

There's a ridiculous little

company we've had forever.

- I'm going to ask the board

to offload it.

- What's it called?

Hollowmade.

Let's hear it for

the Hollowmade shop class

and marching band!

Playing, well, frankly,

I didn't recognize the tune, but, uh...

Now, to head up this fight...

we think we got somebody who's

more than a match for Moramax.

Hollowmade's own factory foreman,

Miss Guts and Gumption...

Miss No-Nonsense herself,

Rose Ratliff!

- Come on up here, girl!

- Yee-haw!

Bless your heart.

- Go get 'em, Rose!

- Think big, Rosie!

Thank you. Whoo!

I appreciate that, Mayor.

I really do.

I don't know about you all,

but I'm mad as a wet wasp.

I've been doing some checking up

on these Moramax folks.

Last year, they put

300 Santa Clauses out of work,

and right before Christmas too.

And now, it's Hollowmade

they want.

No tellin' what they got

up their designer sleeves.

Could be condos,

a ski resort.

Strip-mining's one

sure thing comes to mind.

Are we gonna let 'em swoop down

on us like a bunch of turkey

buzzards in business suits?

- No!

- Pick our bones clean?

- Take our factory,

our jobs, our way of life?

- No!

Can we outsnake 'em?

Hell, yeah!

Now, go on and get out there

and buy those canned peaches

and ceramic items.

Mayor Finkar brought his

two-headed calf all the way

up from Jane Lew.

And it's a beauty. Whoo!

Twenty-five cents a look.

Come on, we got to raise some money

so I can go up north...

and raise some hell and kick

some snooty New York ass.

- Whoo! Are you with me?

- Yeah!

'Cause right here, right now,

we've got the Swamp Mud Boys...

featurin' my sweet sister,

Miss Sadie Ratliff.

Hit it!

Well, hello, Jupiter Hollow

I know you're doin'fine

Every day you work the factory

Every night, a jug of wine

But now them bums at Moramax

They're tryin'to milk us dry

But you all knows my sister Rose

will sound the battle cry

Yee-haw!

Sister Rose is gonna kick 'em

in their little-lo-lay-hee-hoo

Their little-lo-lay-hee-hoo

Their little-lo-lay-hee-hoo

Every cent's gonna help us kick

their little-lo-lay-hee-hoo

The most fiscally prudent action at this

point is to take an aggressive posture

and divest ourselves of Hollowmade.

It's a little backwoods

furniture factory.

They actually still make

porch rockers.

Now, the opportunities

for expansion are virtually nil...

and the buyer has offered us

a most attractive price.

So you can see, gentlemen, that

were we to liquidate Hollowmade...

the return on our investment

would in fact be quadrupled.

Oh, but liquidate... I mean,

aren't there other considerations?

Uh, may I make a-a point? L...

I'm sitting listening here,

and l... what l...

I'm feeling, uh, deeply inside, l...

I mean, what it is, is... I mean, things

are just not computing exactly right.

I mean... Sorry.

Gentlemen,

help yourself to Danish.

Oh, God.

How many times have I told you

you're not to talk about things

you don't understand?

- I know, but...

- Where do you get

this bleeding heart from?

I can't help it.

I think the way Daddy bought

the company is so sweet.

If Daddy were alive, he'd be

the first to agree with me.

Sweetness wouldn't stop him...

from taking a huge profit

out of some toothpick mill

in-in Hickville, West Virginia.

Now, eat the goddam muffin.

And for God's sake,

try to show some poise.

- Poise.

- Miss Shelton?

- Yes?

- We're for it.

But we don't want

any publicity about it... uh...

people losing

their jobs and all that... uh...

From a PR standpoint...

we might look rather heartless

if we shut down the mill.

Last year's hostile takeover

of the Santa City chain

hurt us immeasurably.

Everyone's forgotten all about that.

I know I have.

Three hundred angry Santas picketing

our world headquarters tend to be

remembered rather vividly, Ms Shelton.

Yes, indeed they do.

Gentlemen, gentlemen.

And Rose.

You have my full and complete

assurance that the buyer...

Mr Fabio Alberici, will

continue running this factory...

in concert

with current management.

Therefore, I urge you

to give your most serious

consideration to a "yes" vote...

to the Hollowmade sale initiative at

next Wednesday's stockholders' meeting.

S-So the people of Jupiter Hollow

are in support?

Oh, they are!

I assure you.

Oh, that was...

Did you see that?

Oh, Sadie, you were so good.

You got 'em singin' and dancin'.

- That's gonna add plenty to the fund.

- Oh, the fund, the fund.

- You sung so good, Sadie.

Didn't she, Rose?

- Oh, she did.

What's wrong with you? Don't you

want to save Jupiter Hollow?

I know it's small of me, Rose,

but this doesn't strike me as a way

of life much worth preserving.

Hey, Sadie!

I got this thing all wrapped up.

I'm gonna get that little squealer

right there just for you.

- Oh, great, Petey!

- Yeah? Wanna go get a grape soda?

Not with a man covered

with pig poop. No, sir, I don't.

What, I'm not good enough for you?

You're gettin' a little above

your raisin', if you ask me, Sadie.

She's just kiddin', Petey.

That's sure the truth.

- You been above your raisin'

all your life.

- Mighty nice job, ladies.

We're gonna win. How can you say

that this is a way of life

not much worth preservin'?

Just look at this. How can you

not just love this place?

Oh, God, Rose,

I wish I knew.

I, I feel like the real me is

all cooped up inside, you know?

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