Bon Cop, Bad Cop Page #2

Okay, boys. We're out of here.

- May I remind you

that in the 100-yard-dash,

it's the head and chest

that break the tape.

In horse racing, it's by a nose.

As you can see,

the subject was a true Quebecer.

- Do I need a passport?

- His heart is in Quebec.

And he's got Ontario

up his ass.

- Excuse me?

- I just said

his ass belongs to you.

- Okay.

We'll take it from here.

Get me a ladder.

- A ladder!

- Whoa!

Don't move him.

- How can I?

He's indented in the sign.

- Never mind.

Let's just get this over with.

- What's this?

- Be careful not to move anything.

Ah!

- Ah!

- Careful!

- Ah, sh*t.

- Ah!

Idiot!

(creaking)

Ahhhh!

Argh...

(groaning)

Good morning.

- Hey, nice turtleneck.

It's really you.

What the f***

is squarehead doing here?

- David, you know Martin,

of course,

and this is his boss,

Brian MacDuff from the OPP.

- Pleasure to meet you.

- Yeah, I'm sure. You wanna tell me

why the hell I'm here this early?

- You wanna talk, Brian?

- No, no. It's yourjurisdiction.

- No, no, no, I insist.

- Okay.

We know that the victim

is from Montreal.

- We know...

the victim...

is from Montreal.

- We don't know for sure yet

if it's a murder and if it is,

where the murder victim

comes from.

- But we don't know for sure yet

if it's a murder,

or, if it is,

where the murderer comes from.

- So Captain LeBoeuf and I thought

this would be a great opportunity...

- So we thought,

Captain Leboeuf and I,

this would be a great...

opportunity...

- It's okay, Chief.

I understand English.

- Oh, sh*t... Okay.

It's okay.

David... can English.

He can English.

He can...

- Oh!

- Yes!

- Okay, well, go ahead, then.

- Okay, I go, I go.

So we thought

it was a good hoppor...

- Opportunity.

- It was a good...

- Opportunity.

- Hopportunity to be...

- You may speak French, Captain.

- Ah, for f***'s sake...

- You speak French?

- No, not really.

I had a small gadget

installed in my brain

under people when they speak.

Yes, I speak French.

I was in enriched French

at Upper Canada College.

- Upper what?

- I also lived in Paris for a year.

- Ah, that's why

you're such a snobby pain in the ass.

- Hey...

- Right.

Thing is,

we want to show the RCMP

that they can't have the whole pie.

- No, no. Okay...

- And that if we can cooperate,

it would be very good

for our image

and next year's budgets.

- Yes!

So until further notice,

you're...

...partner.

- You've got to be kidding.

- This is a joke.

- Listen to me, you!

Based on what Sylvain

told me yesterday,

I'd worry more about getting suspended

than who's my new partner.

So if I were you

I'd just shut my hole

and solve this case

as fast as possible.

- I just went through a rough one.

I can't work with this clown!

- Just do it, Martin.

You want that desk job,

don't you?

(phone ringing)

- Grossbut.

- Benoit Brisset is dead.

- Excuse me?

- His body was found

at the Ontario border.

- When?

- We don't have much information yet.

- That's not possible.

Everyone liked Brisset.

- Did he have any problems

with his clients?

- No, I don't think so,

but I'm not familiar with all his cases.

If he had a problem with a client,

I'm sure he'd have told me.

- No doubt, you've known

each other a long time.

- Long enough. We started working

together on the Fleur de Lys.

- That's true.

- And we've been together

ever since.

Has the family been notified?

- I have no idea...

- If I can do anything...

- I'll get back to you

if I hear anything.

- Thank you.

- Hi, Michel.

I've been waiting for you.

- Ah!

- That had to hurt.

- Benoit Brisset, 46.

Recently made partner

at Grossbut, Canuelsberg,

Tiernyskovitch & Brisset.

Divorced, no kids.

Three condos.

One's in Boca, one in Nice.

Works 75 hours a week,

which I gather for Montreal is a lot.

No known mob links.

Member of Le Mirage Golf Club.

Drives a Cherokee.

Anything else you want to know?

- Is he circumcised?

- Yes.

- Jeff, meet my counterpart

from the OPP, Martin Ward.

- Nice to meet you.

- Salut.

- I know at first glance

he looks like a gay accountant.

But believe it or not,

he's not an accountant.

- Gotcha.

- Are you able to determine...

- The height he fell from?

Depends on the speed

of the helicopter.

- Who said anything

about a helicopter?

- Me, I could've sworn

I just said helicopter.

You see,

an airplane goes too fast.

He'd be cut in two,

without your help.

A failed parachute

would still be attached.

Hanglider straps

are too complicated.

You really have to want

to kill yourself.

The air-balloon festival

hasn't started yet.

If it was a stork,

he would've been caught

in a 46-year traffic jam.

So, helicopter.

But to reply to your question,

80 metres max.

Or 236 feet,

4 and 7/8s inches for you.

An inert body in free fall

goes at 30 metres a second.

Looking at this mess, I'd say

a minimum of 25 and a max of 80.

My feeling is that it's not 60.

At 30 meters a second,

the fall would take

exactly 2 seconds.

And that's too round a figure.

I just don't feel it.

Nothing in life

should be so precise.

Maximum 80 metres.

- What about this?

- What's tattoo in English?

- Tattoo.

- Tattoo? A tattoo? That's random.

2 T's and 2 O's,

yet it's the long A

that you pronounce.

- Why is there blood?

- How would you feel

after a 200 feet fall?

And a tattoo can take

up to 10 days to heal.

- I'd say this tattoo

was fresher than that.

A few hours at the most,

it had hardly started to heal.

"Pantutti" for you.

- Then why...

- Why didn't this part bleed?

He started it 2 months ago

and he just finished it yesterday?

Bad answer. Ontario's turn to reply.

Too long!

It's the opposite.

The part that bled was done

while he was still alive.

The other part was done

after he was killed,

you can tell

by the pigmentation.

He was dead before the fall,

because there's also this.

The coagulation of this wound

corresponds to that

of the tattoo.

The wounds from the fall

are more recent,

the patterns are different.

- So he was dead before he fell.

But why a tattoo?

A signature?

- Makes sense.

A tattoo doesn't fit his character.

You don't wear $5,000 Armani suits,

get made a law partner,

go get a tattoo.

- Why not?

- Not very classy.

- Angelina Jolie has tattoos.

- My point exactly. The real question is

why a fleur de lys with a scale?

- Mm-hmm.

- I could give you a thousand reasons.

- One would do.

- Hmm.

- Maybe we should go ask

his partners. Thanks, Jeff.

- If I come up with anything,

I'll call you.

- Sorry, but I didn't get half

of what he said.

- Me neither! As long as we each got

a different half, we'll be okay.

- Uh-huh. Okay. Great.

Thanks, Stefane! We're on our way!

Change of plan.

We can pay Grossbut a visit later.

As we thought,

there were no registered

helicopter flights in that area.

But a farmer saw a chopper

flying low over his field

and he identified it

as being from Helicoptere Libellule,

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