Boobs in the Wood Page #2

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- I'll do it.

I know, but I'm asking Mike.

I know you want to do it.

I will give you one dollar.

No, not you.

- You touch her booty, you get a buck.

- But you've got to do it right now.

Okay, it's a bet.

Do it before lunch is over,

or the bet's off.

Okay, man.

I was ready and determined.

For a dollar, it was worth the risk.

And the booty was looking good.

Sh*t!

Did you see him get hit in his face?

- Damn, she clocked your ass.

- Give me my dollar.

You do not know me. Don't ever

put your stinking hands on me again.

And I will tell my brother.

I so wanted to fit in, I never wondered

why they didn't want to grab her butt.

- Her brother?

- Remember the Bloods and the Crips?

- Yeah.

- Well, that n*gger's a Blood.

When he picks me up, he'll kick

your ass. Bet on that, punk.

- Why didn't you tell me?

- I didn't think she'd get that mad.

- I guess she just tripped.

- You're all in this with me.

You're tripping. You better run

out of here when school is over.

Any other day,

time drags during the last period.

But time was on crack today.

Maybe she'd forget about it.

So much for that.

Mike.

- That girl's got you bugging.

- You're sweating.

- You look like you're fast. Just run.

- What about tomorrow?

You live to run again, fool.

Let's go. We better go this way.

- Am I glad to get out of there!

- Do you wanna shoot some hoops?

What's wrong with you?

Funny how any hint of a fight

always gets around the whole school.

- My sister tells me you grabbed her!

- I didn't mean it!

- You think my sister's a ho?

- No, I think she's pretty.

- Leave him alone.

- F*** you. You want some of me?

- Yeah... I guess so.

- No, this is my fight.

What, n*gger?

I could've sworn I saw the light.

A hand reaching out to me from above.

- My mistake. It was his fist.

- I told you to scare him. Stop!

- Come on, man.

- Stacey, I said stop it.

- Let's go, Alicia.

- Are you all right?

- I'm okay.

- Let's go!

I'm sorry about...

- Are you all right? Damn!

- Come on!

I thought he was gonna kill you.

You got a hit on Stacey, though.

Ain't nobody ever done that.

- Thanks for having my back.

- We always got your back, man.

- We got you into this.

- We can't have you killed the first day.

Let's go. But was it worth it?

Was it worth getting beat down?

Yeah.

- In, baby, in.

- Let's go.

- Where's the aspirin at?

- In the third aisle.

- Where...?

- In the third aisle. Please!

I'm getting you some Tic Tacs.

You've got dragon breath.

What are you smiling about?

It's not funny.

We used to come up here and grab

a bunch of mints for the school dances.

- Grits?

- I used to have all the girls on my tail.

No.

Hold it.

Put another one...

Your no-dancing ass...

- Mike. No dancing.

- How did it go?

- Do it again.

- You're just jealous.

- Man, the dances!

- They was the bomb.

Put this on that n*gger's tab.

If the aisles could talk,

the things they would say!

- Nobody's cooking those grits for you!

- If the aisles could talk, boy.

After a couple of months,

I was getting adjusted to Inglewood.

- Hi, baby.

- I ain't your baby.

- Are you going to the dance?

- Yeah, save a dance for me.

What about you, Mike?

- Yeah, I'm going.

- I can't wait. It's gonna be fresh.

First dance of the year, too.

Leave Tracy at home.

I can't stand that girl.

- What's up?

- What's up, Ro?

You just missed it. Alicia just came

and asked if I was going to the dance.

- So?

- She likes me.

- Why else did she come up to me?

- To see if you were going to the dance.

- She asked me this morning.

- So?

She asked me early in the morning, so

it's probably been on her mind all night.

The dance is gonna be slamming.

You'll get to show what you've got.

- You can dance, right?

- Yeah, I'm like "Dance Fever".

- We're gonna see on Friday.

- You can stay at my crib that night.

- That's cool. I'll ask my mom.

- Yeah, me too.

I had never danced a day in my life.

Not with a girl.

With Alicia being there,

I couldn't look like a fool.

So I figured I'd learn how to dance.

Check this out. 1580 AM, KDAY.

Oh, girl. You think I look good?

I think I look good.

Let me show you something.

Do you like that, girl?

That's cool. Watch this!

Girl, that wasn't it.

That wasn't nothing, girl.

Let me show you something cool.

You like that? You like me?

You sexy girl. Come here,

let me show you something.

You smell good, girl.

What is going on? Michael!

Mom.

I was just dancing.

There's a dance on Friday.

- So you did the freak with a rabbit?

- I've never danced before.

What about Deborah's wedding?

You were so cute.

- I was four. It's different now.

- Look at my little boy growing up.

That's the latest step.

It's called "the hip".

- So how's the job going?

- It's going well. The people seem nice.

Good.

- So who is she?

- What?

Only a woman can make a man

do the crazy stuff you were just doing.

- Come on. It ain't nobody.

- Whatever, boy.

I'm glad to see you like it here.

We're gonna stay here for a while.

Anyway, I think you need

a little more practice.

- Just keep it down.

- Okay, Ma.

This is it!

- Where'd you get that sweet hat?

- Carolina Blue in North Carolina.

Why are you wearing it like

a poindexter? Let me help you out.

- That's how the ballers wear it.

- Everybody got their pen and paper?

- A pen?

- To get girls' numbers.

Whoever gets the most numbers

gets a dollar.

- I don't have a pen.

- Here, I always carry a spare.

- But I'm gonna get the most anyway.

- You're crazy.

It was all new to me. I'd never danced

with a girl, let alone got her number.

Hold on. We didn't do the breath test.

- Sh*t!

- I'm cool.

But for how long? Have you got

some gum, candy, Binaca?

I need something.

My breath is kicking like Bruce Lee.

- Let's go to the mini-market.

- Hell, no. That's like Blood central.

I am not walking in there

with my breath smelling all tart.

Let's just go.

All right, man.

- Take that hat off. It's got blue in it.

- It's light blue.

- Take it off.

- What up, blood?

- My fault.

- Damn, that was too close.

I keep forgetting you're the rookie.

- Here are the refreshments.

- Tic Tacs.

- Good idea, but bad flavour.

- What's wrong with orange?

- School him.

- Tic Tacs are small, but powerful.

Always go small. You might be talking

to some girl, and the candy falls out.

- You'd look stupid.

- But Tic Tacs are hard to notice.

Especially in the dance, right?

And fruit flavours are always bad.

Like Harvard professors. They had

breath mints down to a science.

- That's important for slow dancing.

- What about gum?

I got this.

Always remember, when dealing

with females... Suck, never chew.

- I'll get the green.

- I'll get the white.

Let me get a soda.

- The party started an hour ago.

- We got time.

Give me the money.

Shut the f*** up and move!

- What the hell are you doing?

- Get down.

- What's going on?

- Check it out.

- Not this time. You check it out.

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