Born Yesterday Page #3

- You could promote what he's doing in DC.

- I could tell about Brock Village?

Absolutely.

OK.

Great!

- Yeah?

- Mr Devery, it's JJ.

Harry, it's for you.

- Brock.

- Hello, Uncle Harry?

It's JJ. Get a radio. Billie's on!

- She's on 89.3

- Why? What'd she do?

She's being interviewed.

Holy Christ!

Turn the radio on, 89.3.

Now, you are here as the companion

of multi- millionaire Harry Brock.

How did you two meet?

- In Las Vegas. I was in a show.

- So, you dance and sing?

Yeah, I wasn't only in the chorus,

I was a thespian.

I had lines. Five, to be exact.

Do you wanna hear them?

No!

- Abs... yes. Of course.

- OK, here goes.

Yes, I am.

He was here, but he's not here now.

Oh, just a friend.

I never drink with men I don't know.

Beat it, buster!

I coulda been a star

if I woulda stuck with it.

But Harry didn't like me being in shows.

He likes to go to bed early.

Does Mr Brock do a lot of business

in Las Vegas?

What business?

He came to gamble and meet girls!

He doesn't do that any more.

Now, he just works.

And works and works.

What is Mr Brock doing in Washington?

Is he a strong party man?

Is he! He can throw down a drink

faster than you can unzip your pants.

Boy, can he dance!

We won a limbo contest.

And we got a medal.

She remembered the medal!

You wanna see it?

Yes.

OK. See?

And... looks like first prize.

It has been said

that the love of wealth

is at the heart of all Americans.

Do you think that's true?

- I don't know. Who said it?

- Tocqueville.

He wrote Democracy In America,

possibly one of the most perceptive books

ever written about our system.

It's a book?

No wonder I never heard of it.

In future, I think it would be best to

limit Billie's exposure to the media,

given her limited understanding of...

well, everything.

Couldn't we do something?

Smarten her up a bit?

She didn't know how to play gin rummy

till I taught her.

Now she beats my brains out.

Isn't there some kinda school?

A long time would pass

before school had an impact on Billie.

I think we should send her back.

All she needs is someone to pound

some smarts into her, one on one.

I got an idea.

The four most terrifying words

in the English language.

- Ed tells me you teach at Georgetown.

- That's right.

How much you make?

- What am I, an accountant?

I love this guy!

Listen, Paulie, the reason I ask...

I got this friend.

Maybe you've seen her - Billie?

Billie. Right.

She's a nice kid,

but she's a little on the stupid side.

Not her fault. I found her in Vegas

and for Vegas, she's smart enough.

But Washington?

I'm just scared

she's going to be unhappy.

She's not used to these kind of people.

I figure maybe you could help her.

And me. You know what I mean?

No, I don't.

Show her the ropes, the low-down,

explain to her what goes on.

Really mean a lot to me.

I'd give you 200 bucks a day.

I'm sorry, Harry,

but that's not what I do.

No. You see, money isn't the issue.

- I told you, Harry.

- Shut up!

- OK, I'll do it.

- You see?

As soon as he said money wasn't

the issue, I had him. I love this guy!

You know, Billie, we're in the big time

now. This ain't Chicago.

You're telling me!

You gotta be very careful

of everything you do.

You understand my meaning?

Yeah.

Gin.

Twenty-eight.

Twenty-ei...?

Twenty-eight!

This old man, he played two

He played knick- knack on my shoe

With a knick- knack paddywhack

Give a dog a bone

This old man came rolling home

Do you mind?

No.

Gin.

See?

Thirty-four.

Thirty-four?

Thirty-four! Three, four!

So, anyway, I met a guy.

He's got a lotta time on his hands.

Since he knows this city pretty good,

it might be nice for you

to have someone to do things with.

- What's going on?

- Nothin'!

It's just... he's a smart guy.

It wouldn't hurt you

to learn... some things.

Since when have you been interested

in my brain?

Since you started exposing it

on the radio!

What did I do? I was trying to help you.

Honey, it's not your fault.

People don't know you like I do.

You just...

You could use a little education

yourself, if you ask me.

- Who asked ya?

- Nobody.

So shut up.

Hold on a second. That will be...

225 dollars and ten cents.

- I gotta get the door.

- You always make me pay.

Ten cents.

- Sore loser!

- I'll get it.

- Now, you be nice to him.

- That's him at the door?

I don't want some stuffy old tutor!

- Be nice to him or I'll crack you one.

- It's a free country.

That's what you think!

This is Paul Verrall.

Very pleased to have you here.

I got some business to take care of,

so why don't you two

go someplace nice and talk?

- You wouldn't mind, would you?

- No way, I would love to.

Thanks.

So, what are you?

Some kind of gigolo?

No, I just...

- Well, Harry wants me to...

- He wants you to smarten me up?

No, I'm sure you're...

I think he just wants me to...

Smarten me up.

Yeah.

So, what's he paying you?

Five hundred bucks a day.

Sucker.

You coulda gotten twice that.

He's got a lot of it, you know.

I'd have done it for nothing.

Even if I am stupid,

it hasn't hurt me none.

- What do you mean?

- I've got everything that I want.

I got lots of jewels, big like I like.

Mink coat.

A TV that fits in my purse.

I want something, I ask for it.

If he don't give me what I want,

I don't give him what he wants.

If you get my drift?

And you're happy with this setup?

So long as I know how to get what I want,

that's all I want to know.

Makes sense.

So long as you know

what it is you want.

Exactly.

What?

Well, I mean, if you don't know a lot,

how do you know that a mink coat

is the best thing to have?

Because I used to have

a rabbit coat.

I love this song.

Let's dance.

Oh, I don't... I can't dance.

I can.

Harry and me won a medal once.

Well, this isn't a dancing place.

It is if you're dancing. Come on.

We'll start with the ABC of it

Then we'll roll down

to the XYZ of it

Relax.

Help me solve the mystery of it...

OK, so, we should make a list

of things you would like to do and...

...and, er...

And if a shooting star rolls by

I'll use that star to write "I love you"

A thousand times, across the sky

One thing isn't very clear, my love

Should the teacher

stand so near, my love?

Graduation's almost here, my love

Oh, yeah, yeah, teach me tonight

Maybe I could teach you something.

... a blackboard high above you

And if an astronaut zooms by

I'll reach and grab him real fast

Then write "I love you"...

Well, OK...

Good night, Miss Dawn.

And... thanks! That was fun.

Aren't you gonna

escort me to my room?

- Yeah... Sure, of course.

- You can call me Billie.

Billie.

It's funny, you don't look like a Billie.

No?

Do I look like an Emma?

- Emma?

- Yeah. That's my real name.

I took Billie for Vegas.

No. You don't look like...

I mean, you don't look like an Emma either!

What do I look like?

To me?

Yeah, to you.

Like an angel.

Sweet talk, again!

Well...

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