Boy Culture Page #5

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recreational drugs, particularly marijuana.

Especially marijuana.

Legalization and education, so like with alcohol,

we don't have to rely on urban legend for responsible usage.

What the f*** do you mean, fell out?

We should call someone.

They could put him in jail G's a tranquilizer.

If you do too much, it will make you fall asleep .

He's okay, he's just sleeping .

Who'd you learn this from, your drug dealer?

Trust me, he'll be fine.

Look

I don't care how many drugs or orgies you have,

that's your trip .

But if you hurt Joey

To be fair, they were partying when I got here.

I partook in the sex, not the drugs .

Oh, what a relief.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

I mean about everything .

No

I'm sorry.

No one deserves to hear the things I said to you .

You were right.

I was wrong .

You're not my father!

Yeah, I actually give a sh*t about you .

You can't ground me!

No one's grounding you .

You can do as you please.

We just really think Andrew or I should go with you

while you go clubbing for a while That's all

It's no big deal, people black out every day.

People overdose and die every day.

Do I look like Cyndi Lauper?

She's not dead .

Whoever.

I've been taking care of myself for a long time.

That's the problem .

Look hon, we just think one of us should

be around for you is all .

Why, so you can f*** me again?

How about, if I'm good for three months

X has to f*** me.

So uneed fair to me.

Hell no !

I'll save up my allowance.

Go to your room !

F*** you !

Sounds like a good idea.

Since it was our first date, I figured I'd take Andrew

to Portland in style.

God damn!

You rented that for a road trip?

You don't want'em to think you're a fag

and dating a loser.

I'm so used to being treated by sugar daddies that

the whole role reversal was refreshing.

Joey'll be alright. Right?

He'll be fine, it's us I'm worried about.

Ever been on a road trip?

Eight years ago .

God, I keep forgetting how old you are.

I'm like a year older than you .

And I haven't been gay for a whole decade.

Where'd you go?

Seattle.

Good-bye small town .

Hello small city.

I'm glad you made the trip .

Both of them .

So why are your parents going to your ex-fiancee's wedding?

I think there's some hope of a dramatic objection

at the last second when I stop the wedding and

confess my love for Jill .

This should be fun .

How long were you with Jill?

Engaged for a year, dated for three.

She doesn't know I'm gay.

All because you wanted to do her brother?

Don't tell me you have a kid somewhere.

No .

Maybe someday though .

How about you?

Joey's plenty.

You're really good with him .

You too, apparently.

Seriously, you'd make a good father.

The only good fatherly quality about me

is that I know I shouldn't have kids .

Make any money?

Nah, but I shoved my business cards in the glory holes .

So am I pretending to be your boyfriend?

Roommate?

Fuckbuddy?

Let's just play it by ear.

Anything else should I know about your family?

They're black.

Oh, let's go back to Seattle.

I've heard about those people.

You'll probably be the only white guy at this thing .

I've never been one to fit in .

Have you been anywhere where you were the only white person?

At least I won't be the only fag .

I love club music.

Everything is so cut and dried.

You love someone, set them free.

Love me or let me go.

Prove your love.

My love is your love.

It's love or it's not love.

Love is sex.

Sex is love.

I defy you to find a club an them that says I love you

but I'm not really sure what love is all about

and I still want to have sex with blah-blah-blah

Those things are harder to rhyme.

Take your time.

Please.

So what are your folks' names?

That might be helpful .

Oren and Zelma.

And there's Cheyenne.

Who?

My sister.

She's twelve.

Imagine me with corn rows, A-cups

and a mouth the size of Lake Union .

I usually do .

Hello baby!

This is my roommate.

I told your ass he was gay!

And I told you Andrew will talk about it

when he is ready to .

He looks ready to me.

Don't mind Cheyenne.

She's been watching to o much Showtime.

How long you been dating my brother?

Cheyenne!

So how long you boys been roommates?

Just over a year, sir.

A year?

That's a long time.

I'm happy to see you're not alone.

How long have you known?

Since you were eight.

But I wasn't sure until you broke up with Jill

And what line of business you in son?

I collect etchings .

You mean like, art?

Like presidents .

On dollar bills .

Better not be no drug dealer.

Cheyenne!

Oh, nothing as glamorous as that.

I play the stock market.

With enough real estate and bonds in my back pocket

for when things go sour.

A man after my own heart.

Did we do something that made you think

you couldn't tell us?

No, Ma.

You did everything right.

I'm glad you have someone.

And damn, he is fine.

Damn I forgot to make up the guestroom !

You don't have a problem sharing Andrew's bed do you?

Not at all Mrs.Thompson

Call me Zelma.

Well that wasn't so hard

It's like they would've been upset if I wasn't gay.

What's up with that?

I didn't give them credit

I'm glad I could provide you with immoral support.

This is my ultimate fantasy.

In your childhood bed?

Hell yeah .

With your folks in the house?

Even hotter.

It feels weird .

I mean there's like booties and sh*t hanging on the wall .

Damn !

It feels like you feel just fine.

Andrew.

Do you love me?

I don't know.

Never mind .

Forgive me if I don't know if I'm in love with you yet.

Let's just stop talking about it.

Before I say something funny.

I mean, don't get offended X, but can you have sex

without getting paid for it?

What do you want from me, Andrew?

You can't change me.

I don't care you're a hooker.

It's not even about that.

What is it about?

It's about

It's about taking a chance.

I don't know if we'll fall in love.

Love isn't a transaction .

You don't just get what you putin .

You have no idea what you're talking about.

Let's just call it a night.

If you keep pushing me away sooner or later

I'm going to give up .

That's why I like hustling.

I can predict those relationships.

Clients fulfill my need for human contact

and every date has money back guarantee.

Forgive me Father I was too proud to admit he was right.

Who's Gregory?

What?

You talk in your sleep .

Liar.

If you'd slept with someone they would've told you .

You said,Gregory, I'm ready

He's one of my clients

That's disgusting .

This whole thing was a mistake.

You're telling me.

At least you're out to the family now.

Please tell me you put these here.

God, Mom must've done it.

That's so embarrassing .

Hate to disappoint her.

But no problem disappointing me.

So, let's speed this up .

Tell me you want me to give up .

Boys ?!

Breakfast!

Okay.

Andrew? !

Candace!

How ya been?

Really great!

It's awesome to see you !

Where is everybody?

JJ ?

And Sheila?

Jill said she couldn't trust nobody after you dogged her.

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