Bride & Prejudice Page #7

for all her 51 wedding suits.

51 .

And that's gonna be the gym.

And that's my crib.

Very nice, Kholi saab.

CHANDRA:
l know what you're thinking.

But he's a good man.

l'm not romantic like you, Lalita.

l didn't want to take the chance

in case my prince never came.

l know he's not for you, but...

but he's kind and...

and adores me.

And l love it here.

Chandra, l'm truly happy for you.

l... l think l was a bit too quick to judge him.

l'm sorry.

lt's fine.

- Beautiful, isn't it?

- Yes, Kholi saab, it's lovely.

The ceiling is so ornate.

To think my wedding's going to be here!

Just put those figures on my desk.

Oh, here we go.

Hi.

Hey.

- Mr Darcy.

- Hello, everyone.

Good afternoon, sir.

lsn't it great we're all together again?

Er, only this time we have

home-court advantage, no, sir?

OK, come on, l'll show you around.

- Please.

- Mama.

Come, come. Come, Beta.

Mmm, that's very good, Paul.

Excellent. l'll put the order in today.

Mmm.

Mmm, Will!

Mother.

l'd like you to meet the Bakshi family.

So these are Kholi's relatives?

Such a pleasure to meet you, madam.

And your lovely hotel.

lt's, er, first class.

So tell me everything about lndia.

l've always been fascinated by it.

lndia is such a huge country,

l wouldn't know where to begin.

lt's always been a dream of mine,

since l was a little girl, to go there.

l was devastated

when Will said that l shouldn't go.

Oh, that's not what l said, Mother.

l said that it might be hard for you to travel there.

But you're the one

that didn't want to buy the hotel there.

The Board wanted to.

Oh, everybody has their hand on lndia

these days.

But Will refused.

Well, that was for lots of reasons.

ln fact, it was Lalita who helped me

make that decision.

A decision that lost us a fortune.

Well, there's so much to see in lndia, Mrs Darcy.

You must come some time.

Well, if l had a hotel, l might have.

But, well, with yoga, and spices,

and Deepak Chopra,

and wonderful Eastern things here,

there's no point in travelling there any more.

Well, l don't know about that.

People haven't stopped going to ltaly

because Pizza Hut's around their corner.

Yes, right.

Yes.

Ah, Georgina.

Oh, hey, Georgie.

Hey.

Hey, come here.

Everyone, l'd like you to meet

my little sister, Georgie.

- Hi.

- Hi.

So this is Lalita?

Yeah.

Oh, Will told me all about your fab time

together in lndia.

Food poisoning, being ravaged by mosquitoes.

Not your brother's idea of a perfect holiday.

There were lots of things l liked.

Well, l hope l get to hear you play guitar.

- What?

- Yeah, Will said you played beautifully.

No.

He'sjust exaggerating.

No, my brother never lies.

Lunch.

He's one of the most eligible bachelors

in this town.

You should be stirring

your husband's dinner, not trouble.

- Darcy was just being friendly.

- Very friendly.

After meeting his mother,

l even felt a little sorry for him.

l think what changed your mind

was seeing the size of his hotel.

(Phone rings)

KHOLl:
Oh, hello?

Ah, hello, Mr Darcy.

What can l do for you?

Oh, Lalita. Yeah.

Well, yes, she's just here.

Huh?

(Falsetto cry)

(Cheering and whooping)

(Singing in Spanish)

Here's to the only person

l've ever seen stand up to my mother.

l hope l wasn't too rude.

Mmm. Trust me, it's good for her.

lt reminded me of when l first arrived in lndia.

l'm trying to deal with everything and then,

boom, you jump straight down my throat.

l didn't know what had hit me.

You deserved it.

Oh, come on.

(Song finishes)

l really like this place.

lt's not at all where l expected you'd take me.

Ah-ha, you see. l told you you misjudged me.

The band is great.

Why don't you show them how it's done?

No, no, no, no, no way.

No, l guess your guitar playing can't compare

to your sister's snake dance.

(Romantic music)

# Show me the way

# Take me to love

# Things only heard now l want to feel

# My soul caressed by silken breeze

# Whisper secrets to listening trees

# Show me that world

# Take me to love

# Show me the way

# Take me to love

# Come out, blue moon

# l need a friend soon

# To share what l feel, it's so rare

# Shine down on me so l can see

# The silver street that leads me

to the place l want to be

# Show me the way

# Take me to love

# Show them the way

# Take them to love

# Things only heard now they want to be

# Two beings with one beating heart

# For their whole lives not to part

# Show them that world

# Take them to love

# La-la la-la la la-la-la

# Show them the way

# La-la la-la

# La-la la-la-la

# Take them to love

# La-la la la-la-la

# La-la la-la

# La la-la-la

# La-la la-la la la-la-la

# Yeah-yeah yeah-yeah...

- Hey, how you doing?

- Great.

- This is my wife.

- Nameste.

- My mother-in-law.

- Hello.

Jaya, smile, please.

Your face looks like

a baby's smacked bottom.

Kholi wants you to meet

a plastic surgeon from Orange County.

l can't just forget Balraj like that, Mama.

Please don't make it any worse.

l'm sorry, excuse me.

Er, can l talk to you for a second?

You look more comfortable this time.

- lt really suits you.

- There you are!

- Hi, Lalita.

- Hello, Mrs Darcy.

Er, l'd like you to meet Will's girlfriend, Anne.

Lolita.

That's such a cute name.

Like the movie, right?

Er, it's, um, Lalita.

Nice to meet you...

Anne.

- Anne.

- This is so much fun.

Look at all the colours.

Just imagine, she would have missed all of this,

so l insisted that she come

on the plane from New York with me.

Lalita, doesn't Anne look wonderful

in lndian clothes?

Oh, stop that, Catherine.

She's too kind.

You look lovely.

Shall we go? The ceremony is starting.

..keep her, in sickness and in health,

as long as you both shall live?

Yes, l do.

Chandra, do you take this man as your

lawfully wedded husband, to love,

honour and comfort him, and to keep him,

in sickness and in health,

as long as you both shall live?

Yes, l do.

By the power vested in me

by the state of California,

l hereby pronounce you man and wife.

You may kiss.

- Hi.

- Hey.

- You OK?

- Yeah.

- Thanks.

- Sure.

- That ceremony was so beautiful.

- Yeah.

- They both look really happy.

- Mm-hm.

So l guess the next lndian wedding

l'll get to go to is Balraj's.

Well, that's if he and my brother make up.

What do you mean?

Well, he and my brother

aren't really talking much right now.

Yeah? Why?

Um, he didn't tell me everything,

but l guess Balraj met someone in lndia

and Will didn't think she was right

and ended up having to talk him

out of marrying her.

Your brother talked him out of it?

Oh, no, he wasjust looking out for him.

The girl's mom was a total nightmare.

She was a gold-digger

out to nail a rich hubby for her daughter.

Scary or what?

Oh, there's Will.

Oh, l'm... l'm sorry, l gotta go.

Lalita, wait.

Please, give me a minute to explain.

l'm sorry about Anne coming. l didn't know.

l don't give a damn about her.

l hope you two are very happy.

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