Bride Wars Page #4

We could sue. We could sue.

You're a lawyer. We could sue 'em all.

We could sue the Plaza. We could sue Marion.

We could sue Angela-

What's the point?

None of them are gonna make it right.

No. It's up to us.

I want you at my wedding.

And whichever way this works out...

one of us will just have

to be married on a different day.

Absolutely. I mean, you know,

I want you at my wedding.

Obviously. If we can't

think of any other way out of this...

one of us will simply

have to be flexible.

Yeah. One of us will just

have to change venues.

Right. One of us could.

Rrobably, um, not:::

the one of us who's been

saving up for a decade...

because she makes a pittance

compared to the other one of us, but-

True. I mean, or it would be...

if the other one of us wasn't

so desperate to get married at the Plaza...

because the Plaza, practically, is the only

happy memory she has of her childhood.

- So, oops. That's-

- Right.

- One of us will have to move her date.

- Yep.

One of us will.

And until one of us decides, we shouldn't

make any concrete plans.

Agreed. There's some time

before we lock things in.

- Let's just not do anything-

- Right.

- until one of us moves her date.

- Okay.

So, um-

Talk to you soon.

One of us should-

Call the other one.

One of us hasn't called me yet,

but you know what?

She's gonna move her date. She always was

the bendy one, even as a kid, remember?

Yeah, she didn't sound

too bendy to me.

[ TV:
Explosions, Beeps ]

[ Beeps ]

I called Fletch, and she picked up.

He's doin'my taxes tomorrow night:

You can't get all buddy-buddy

with him. Not now.

Anyway, Daniel can do your taxes.

He's ""financey.''

It's a hedge fund, babe.

We don't do a lot of tax prep.

- Whatever. You do our taxes.

- Fletch has been my accountant

for six years. I'm going.

You're being ridiculous:

just have a double wedding:

What are we, 41 -year-old twin sisters?

Babe! Double wedding.

[ Fletcher]

A double wedding: I think that's a great idea:

- It would be a hell of a party.

- You know, uh, no.

[ Chuckles ]

I've shared everything my whole life with Liv.

- I'd kinda like my own day just-just once.

- [ Calculator Clicking ]

I know, bug. Is this everything?

This is all your gas receipts-

Threw it all in the shoe box.

I don't know.

- It's my dream too-To get married at the Plaza.

- [ Clicking ]

I have been saving since I was 1 6.

I just need a few more days

to:
:: let it go:

I'll find a new dream.

Liv's reasons are better than mine.

It's like American Idol, all right?

Liv is the Simon. Ugh. God.

I mean, no offense.

But you're the Paula.

Even when they can't sing,

you compliment their outfit:

- It's nice:

- Well, but everyone listens to Simon.

I wouldn't marry Simon.

I'd marry me some Paula.

Mmm.

- That's nice.

-just pick one. I'm fine with any of'em.

See? That's why I need a maid of honor.

You don't care.

I- Hey, you wanna have her

back in the game?

You know what you're gonna have to do,

and the sooner the better.

- We need to give our guests some notice.

- Exactly.

- Which is why save-the-dates

are so key, but you don't care.

- [ Rhone Rings ]

- It's not that I don't care.

- Well, get your phone then.

- Hello?

- Men.

Yo, Fletch. No, nothin' much.

Just lookin' at save-the-dates or invites.

- Are we still on for tomorrow?

- Yeah, totally.

Any sign of progress on your end?

Is Liv softening at all?

No way. And there's no way

she's gonna blink first.

They haven't spoken for a week:

That's a century in girl years.

What is it about weddings

that makes 'em so worked up?

I know. I have no idea.

It's, like, the wrong time to let

the guy know that you're crazy.

- You know what I mean? It's not how I'd play it.

- Yeah.

- [ Door Opens ]

- Oh, you know what? She's here now.

- I'll see you tomorrow?

- All right.

[ Emma ]

Hey:

- Hi, sweetie.

- Hi.

- How was pep squad?

- I hate pep squad.

I particularly hate

peppy teenage girls...

who insist everyone be aggressive-

B.E. aggressive.

It's, like, there are other pathways in life

besides aggression, you know?

I'm gonna call Liv.

- Really?

- Yeah.

Amie and Marissa are

throwing us that joint shower...

and it'd be good to have all this

behind us by then. Right?

- You sure?

- Yeah.

Yeah:
I agree: I was just talkin'

to Daniel:
She's on her cell:

You should call her. They're out

doin' their save-the-dates or whatever.

- What?

- You should hit her up.

You have to know your ""date'' date...

to send out your save-the-dates.

Oh.

We were both gonna wait, and she- she-

I ca- I can't believe it.

You can't believe this?

Really? It's Liv.

- She's always thinking about number one.

- No:

Not this time. No.

No, no, no, no, no.

I am a bride too. Okay?

I'm number one too:

I-You are my number one.

I know. That's how I feel.

Bug, what are you doing?

- [ Sighs ]

- [ Beeping ]

- Subject-

- Listen. Listen. No, no, no, no, no.

Emergency. This is not spam.

- I'm getting married,june 6-

- You don't have to slam on the keys.

The Plaza Hotel. Be there.

X-O-X-O-X-O-X-O. Emma.

Address book. B.C.C. everyone.

Oops:
Not you, Liv:

- And send:

- [ Beeps ]

[ Beeping, Buzzing ]

""Emergen-C-C-C.

"Thys' is "nit' spam.

- I'm get married.june 6th.''

- [ Sizzling ]

- [ Beeping ]

- ""K.j.A.''? ""Kuh-jaw''?

- [ Beeps ]

- ""Emma.''

What is ""kuh-jaw,'' Emma?

[ Beeps ]

Great. Emma's wedding's

gonna be better than ours was.

- Glen.

- [ Beeps ]

Maybe her marriage

will be better too.

- Not filled with loneliness and sadness.

- [ Toilet Flushes ]

I hope you can appreciate

the positions Amie and I are in.

- We're not taking sides.

- Relax.

- We're not making any plans

until we figure this out.

- Wow.

- You're so cool about it.

- Yeah.

- How else am I gonna be?

- I mean-Without taking sides

though, I have to say...

Emma's save-the-date e-mail

was a smidge tacky.

I mean, ""june 6 at the Plaza,'' smiley face?

What's next, hearts over her i's?

- Come on, really- What was she thinking?

- Oh, hey.

- I know, right?

- That was so tacky.

- It's shocking.

- [ Emma ] Hi:
Hi, Heidi:

[ Indistinct ]

- Oh, Elizabeth, I love my ring.

- [ Woman ] Oh, my gosh:

[ Liv ]

Emma?

You sent out your save-the-dates?

Yeah, I did, actually.

- [ Woman Clears Throat ]

- Uh-

Surprised?

So one of us...

is not moving her date?

[ Both Slurping ]

Well, you amaze me, Liv. You really do.

You-You never ask me what I want.

You just figure you know best, end of story.

""Emma, wear this.

Emma, say that.''

Well, Emma's pretty

frickin' tired of it.

- Oh, whoa.

- Don't think I didn't notice

how totally freaked out...

-you were because I had the nerve

to get engaged before you did.

- Okay, wait:

First of all, Daniel

bought that ring in December.

Okay? So officially, I was first.

- Oh, pathetic. Pathetic!

- Second, people always make you

do things you don't wanna do:

Emma, it's like you don't have a spine.

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