Bridegroom Page #2

everywhere he was.

Tom would always be playing the

piano at home,

Singing, dancing around.

- # come on, baby

# you're driving me crazy

# goodness gracious

# great balls of fire!

- He was doing his tricks

on the trampoline,

And he was always performing.

For tom, there was never

any such thing as too much.

Tom's dad, he was a simple

blue-collar worker,

Came home late, got up really

early the next day,

And, you know, did it again.

Both of his parents sacrificed

a lot for tom's happiness.

His mom took a job as a janitor

so that tom could go to culver.

Not many parents

would do that...

Would start cleaning toilets

so their son could have

The best education.

Tom's dad was in vietnam,

and that's why

He went to vietnam

when he was in high school.

He definitely respected his dad

for fighting for his country.

I think, as tom got older,

as tom became his own person,

It just became difficult

for them to connect.

Tom was always very adamant

About saying

what he believed in,

And it didn't work with his dad.

- And it's sad,

but I really think that,

If more people would give me

a chance to be their friend,

I could show them that,

Just 'cause

I'm not exactly like them,

That I'm still

a good person.

Hi. How's it going?

what?

I'm just coming

to get the usual.

All right. Thank you.

It's kind of pathetic

If they know exactly what I get

every time.

In kalispell, seriously,

There's tons of people

at dairy queen.

It's the cool place to be.

yeah, let's see.

What?

She just closed the camera.

Oh, there's... there's...

Oh, geez.

They closed the windows.

I actually worked here,

But I didn't tell people

that I worked here.

I have to admit

That I want to be

one of those people

That people are like,

"ooh!

Whoa! He looks good. "

'cause I enjoy running,

But when I run, it's on

a treadmill in our house,

Because I do not want

people seeing me running.

I do not want people to see me,

really, at all.

The one thing that I wanted

Was just someone that I could

talk to and relate to,

That accepted me for being me.

I developed a crush

for a guy named matt parker.

And we would spend the night

at each other's houses

All the time.

We would play basketball

outside.

We were just best friends.

It was in high school

that I finally got the courage

To tell matt how I felt,

and I wrote him a love letter.

I was nervous.

I was so nervous

about giving him the letter.

But he had to tell me

that he's not gay.

And it broke my heart,

but at the same time,

I was still so happy that

he was willing to be my friend.

- There was a situation with

a couple friends in high school,

And they were questioning

his sexuality

And kind of were,

you know, mocking him,

Making fun of him,

And a couple of his friends

completely shunning him.

- I got a phone call from one

of his best friend's mother,

And she wanted me to come over.

She was very upset.

- Once my mom told me that she

was going over to matt's house,

I knew immediately

this was not gonna be good.

- It wasn't, you know,

really a love, love letter.

It was just,

you know, he admired matt,

He enjoyed his time,

And it was just, I thought,

like a good friendship letter.

- It was nothing distasteful.

It was nothing sexual.

It was just telling him

how he felt about him.

- I let her say

everything she wanted to say,

And after she was done,

I just told her,

I said, "you'll never have

to worry about this again,

Because shane will never

be around matt,

And I don't to ever hear

from you again. "

I don't want to say

what I really told her.

It wasn't polite,

and I just told her, basically,

Take the flying leap

and to leave my son alone.

- Matt's parents were

very prominent in the community.

His dad was a principal.

His mom was a teacher.

I was told by the principal

That I wasn't allowed

To go to any sporting events,

Because matt was on the teams.

- That was the big place to be.

That was where everyone

in town was,

And shane wasn't welcome.

- Matt was also in the same

church community,

And shane wasn't able

To go on a very important trip

with his youth group.

- Matt's parents made it

so he couldn't go,

And he had raised all this money

to go on this trip,

And he was devastated.

He acted

like it was no big deal,

But you could tell he was hurt.

- Once this letter came out,

This boy and his parents went

and shouted it to the world.

Kids at school were constantly

picking on him.

- He wasn't accepted anymore.

They called him gay.

They called him fag.

The names that they called him

were just horrendous.

- There's a mentality

of the "cowboy way,"

Which does not include

people that are gay.

So it's a tough place.

- Before he was banned,

shane was at a football game,

And all these kids started

spitting in this cup.

And next thing I know,

the one kid

That used to be a real good

friend of shane's had this cup,

And he was just about ready

to tip it on shane's head.

And let me

tell you... if you want to talk

About a mother bear

protecting her cub,

This woman came unglued.

I said, "you put that damn cup

down, and leave him alone. "

It was just heartbreaking

to see that happen to my son.

- It was after all the drama

with matt and his family

That I just went

to a really dark place,

And I had a breakdown.

- I got a call from the school

informing me

My son hasn't been to school

for two weeks.

- Other kids made his life

literally a living hell,

And it never really got better,

And I don't think he ever saw

it would get better,

And that's why

he just stopped going.

- One evening,

all three daughters and I

Went to the furniture store,

And it was his birthday,

And he was by himself,

just hanging out with his mom.

He was very depressed.

He was not shane.

He was like a shell of himself.

- I was sick of the embarrassment

and the pain

That I was bringing

to my family.

I felt like the only way that

I can make their lives better

Is by taking my own.

I was at my dad's house,

I was home alone,

And I just walked

over to his gun case.

And I took one of the guns,

And I just went

back in the living room,

And I just sat there,

and I held it.

I mean,

there was so many thoughts,

Like, going through my head

at that moment.

It was like for over an hour,

just really contemplating,

Like, what my next step

should be.

Fortunately,

I also thought through

In that it wouldn't be fair

to my family.

It wouldn't be fair to my mom.

And I just had to visualize

What the experience

would be like for them

If I did take my life.

And it wouldn't be worth it.

Also, on some level,

I must have believed

That, somehow, someday,

There's gonna be someone

out there

Who's gonna love me for me.

- Tom just had this presence.

He had this energy.

He was always singing

and laughing

And enjoying life so much.

- # there was a decorated general

with a heart of gold #

- He was at the top of his class.

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