Bruce Almighty Page #11

48.

EXT. ALLEY

Bruce approaches the gang.

BRUCE:

Hey guys, remember me?

The gang members turn to Bruce.

HOOD #1

Oh look, it's the hero.

HOOD #2

Hungry for another can of whoop-

ass?

HOOD #3

Your stereo sounds great in my car,

man.

He and a couple other gang members laugh and high-five.

BRUCE:

Look, I don't want to fight you

guys. So as soon as you apologize,

I'll be on my way.

A beat, then the Hoods BURST OUT LAUGHING. A few circle

behind, surrounding Bruce.

HOOD #1

Oh, yeah. I'll apologize... The

day a monkey climbs out of my butt.

BRUCE:

What a coincidence. That's today.

The Hood gets a PAINED LOOK, starts gyrating around, then a

MONKEY comes climbing out the back of his baggy pants.

The Big Guy looks at Hood #1.

BIG GUY:

Did that come out of your butt,

man?

Hood #1 faints from shock.

BRUCE:

Now I'm going to have to teach the

rest of you guys a lesson.

49.

HOOD #2

Yeah, you and whose army?

BRUCE:

Just me... and me...

ANOTHER BRUCE steps out from behind a stack of crates.

BRUCE:

And me, and me, and me, me, me, me,

me and me and me.

As Bruce talks, DUPLICATE BRUCE'S begin popping out from

various spots, a doorway, hanging down from a fire escape, a

dumpster pops open, six Bruce's jump out.

BRUCE:

PILE ON THE RABBIT1

T HE B RUGES CONV ERGE ON TH E GA NG --

Hood #2 is instantly tackled by THREE BRUGES --

ONE BRUCE kneels down behind a hood, ANOTHER BRUCE pushes him

down over his back. The two Bruce's high-five --

A Hood climbs a fire escape. ONE BRUCE gives a hand up to

ANOTHER BRUCE, who takes pursuit. ANOTHER BRUCE leans out of

a window SMASHES a potted plant over his head --

ON THE MONKEY - SCREECHING, ENJOYING THE EXCITEMENT

Our Bruce stands in the middle of the action, happily

watching the mayhem.

HOOD #2

Let's get out of here, manl

Hood #2 takes off running, the gang members follow.

BRUCE:

Okay guys, Kum Ba Yal

The Bruce's jog over, leaping and diving into Bruce's body.

BRUCE:

I'll take it from here.

Bruce takes a deep breath, OPENS HIS MOUTH WIDE, RELEASING A

SWARM OF LOCUSTS --

50.

EXT. ALLEY - CONTINUOUS

The gang streams out of the alley screaming, COVERED IN

LOCUSTS.

Bruce exits the alley, the monkey at his side. He looks down

to the monkey.

BRUCE:

Back home for you, little one.

The monkey takes off back into the alley, as we see HOOD #1

stumbling to his feet.

HOOD #1

NoI NOOOOO1

He takes off running, the monkey in hot pursuit.

ON BRUCE:

He belches and one last locust flies out. He reacts to the

unpleasant aftertaste and walks off.

CUT TO:

CLOSE ON - BRUCE

We widen to an UP ANGLE of him standing on the top of

Buffalo's tallest SKYSCRAPER. Clouds swirl behind him. He

looks out over the vast city lights, opens his arms and

proclaims to the world.

BRUCE:

I AM THE LORD THY BRUCE ALMIGHTY.

MY WILL BE DONE I

Bruce poses in dramatic god-like form, lightning crashes

behind him. He is an awesome god.

INT. BRUCE AND GRACE'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

Grace sits on the floor next to the coffee table with a box

of photos working on the album. She takes a sip of wine,

sets down the glass. Sam walks over and laps up the wine.

GRACE:

(to Sam)

Well, at least I have someone to

drink with.

Grace hears Bruce coming up the stairs, singing.

51.

BRUCE:

What if God was one of us. . .

Just a slob like one of us...

Just a stranger on a bus...

Trying to make his way. . .

Grace reacts a bit surprised by Bruce's happy tone, she gets

up, opens the door and there stands BRUCE, beaming smile,

holding a very unique BOUQUET OF FLOWERS.

BRUCE:

(finishing song)

...home.

GRACE:

(re:
the flowers)

Oh, my God.

BRUCE:

You can call me Bruce.

GRACE:

Where have you been? You're

so...happy.

BRUCE:

Who wouldn't be on a night like

this?

(holding out the flowers)

For you.

Grace takes the flowers, gives Bruce a kiss, still sizing up

his mood.

GRACE:

These are amazing. What are they?

BRUCE:

It's a totally new breed. A cross

pollination between tulips and

Daisies. I call them Todayzees.

GRACE:

Todayzees? Okay...

Grace goes to put them in water.

INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS

GRACE:

Bruce, is there something you're

not telling me?

52.

BRUCE:

Nothing of this world. Why?

GRACE:

What do you mean, why? Last night

you weren't exactly happy with

life.

BRUCE:

Last night, I was only human.

Bruce backs out of the kitchen seductively.

INT. LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Bruce breezes through, casually instructs the stereo as he

passes.

BRUCE:

CD 4, Track 7.

The Stereo illuminates and Barry White music plays.

EXT. BALCONY - CONTINUOUS

Bruce opens the doors, steps onto the balcony. He surveys

the cloudy sky, reaches up with his hand and ERASES THE

CLOUDS, LIKE ON A CHALKBOARD.

Still not completely satisfied he reaches up toward the moon

and makes a LASSOING MOTION, THEN BEGINS TO PULL.

CUT TO:

OUTER SPACE - BEHIND THE MOON

Earth far off in the distance - And with a THUNDEROUS RUMBLE

the MOON starts MOVING CLOSER TO EARTH.

BACK TO SCENE:

Bruce adds a finishing touch by adding several stars with

points of his finger.

Grace joins Bruce on the balcony and is taken aback by the

perfectly orchestrated sky.

GRACE:

Wow, it really cleared up. I've

never seen the moon that big.

Bruce puts his arms around Grace from behind.

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