Business Is Business

Genre: Comedy, Short
Director(s): Erle C. Kenton
Year:
1921
43 Views


Hurry up.

Hurry up.

- Is this the right place?

- Depends on what you want.

It's the right place.

- We haven't agreed on a price yet.

- One hundred?

You're really something.

A woman. A real woman.

You can take your coat off.

You're really horny.

- You're the first in three years...

- Want this off?

- That'll be 25 extra.

- Fine. Take if off.

- Is that it?

- 25 doesn't get you the full package.

Take this off too.

Another 25.

Mighty beast.

I want it all off, everything.

You're turning me on.

For another 100

I'll take everything off.

- Where have you been?

- Africa.

- With Development Aid.

- No girls around?

- One, a Dutch one.

- And...?

She was a nun.

It's too soon.

I came too fast.

What a pity.

That'll be 285 guilders,

including tax.

- Ma'am?

- I'd like some pumps.

- What size?

- Twelve.

They're for my sister.

She's embarrassed

about her big feet.

The largest size we have

is nine, ma'am.

- I'll take them.

- But that's three sizes too small.

- They'll pinch.

- Perfect.

- May I help you?

- I'm looking for a mask.

- For a children's party.

- Something cheerful then.

This one?

Or this one?

No, not that kind.

That one.

That's exactly what I want.

For a children's party?

May I come in?

Take off your clothes.

Everything?

Everything.

- You won't scare me, will you?

- Who knows?

And don't count on your chauffeur.

Hurry up.

It wasn't a hundred, Sjaak.

I swear.

Get in bed.

I'm coming to get you.

I'm coming.

You're going to get it.

It's me.

The screams were a great touch.

- Something extra.

- That's generous.

My treasures.

No, don't!

Watch out!

Jerk, this belonged to my mother.

This too?

And this too?

What's done is done.

- Hey you two. Cut it out.

- You nasty b*tch.

That was close.

It's every day now, huh?

He thought I held some money back.

He's so tight.

I don't see how

you put up with him.

He had such

a rotten day fishing today.

Look at this...

- Cassius Clay in action.

- Get lost.

You should be ashamed.

She gives you whatever you want.

A sexy car, suits. And enough

rods to start up a fishing club.

I don't have a decent reel.

Here, take it.

Her screams earned it.

Go buy a reel.

Fighting one minute,

making up the next.

Here, I'm off to Leo's.

I'm not in a hurry. You?

You can't keep Greet waiting.

Legs.

Arms.

Feet.

Finally...

Fine, stomach in.

You look great. Bye, love.

I'll straighten up.

You go off to work.

Bye, sweetie.

- How about for ten bucks?

- Ten bucks?

No, you'd better try Jopie.

Good to see you.

You look great.

You wish.

It usually works.

As long as he works.

That's funny.

Don't worry,

I've never had any complaints.

Can I use your phone?

- What are you up to?

- Have to make a call.

- Need the phone book?

- No, I know the number.

Third time in they notice us.

- Found one?

- Hello, dear. That you?

Yes, I'm working late again.

Of course I could've phoned earlier.

I need to balance the books.

No, it'll be late.

- Endives?

- Sounds great.

No, I'll grab a sandwich.

Bye. Give the kids a hug.

Daddy's got the night off.

- This is my girlfriend.

- Hello.

- What are you drinking?

- Two beers.

Can't you see she's with me?

We're going to have

a great time.

- You're lit.

- No, I'm not.

You're trembling all over.

Hold out your hands.

Don't get your suit wet.

Take the glasses.

She's not the only one.

Forget it. I'd rather

go home for some endives.

- I helped you out there.

- And cost me a pretty penny too.

I've no money,

but I've got a big heart.

- So...

- I'm a contractor. I earn enough.

- You know what I would like?

- Let me guess.

Here? It's a strip joint.

Come on,

the champagne's good.

Now, one of our

most talented artists.

From distant Nichninokawat,

now in Holland:
Madrouschka.

Champagne.

Naked in front of everyone.

- You do it.

- Not like that.

- No?

- No.

Oh dear, she's got goose bumps.

You filthy b*tch.

- Here.

- What's that for?

Let's go.

And now, folks...

Sandra with her tame goldfish.

I don't have to teach you a thing.

- Will you stay a bit?

- How long do the others stay?

Jerk.

- How long? Half an hour?

- Ten minutes.

And you've had your ten.

Out of my bed.

- Stay, it's very late.

- Perhaps another time.

Your wife's waiting?

- I'll drop by.

- I've heard that before.

You never see them again

if they say that.

How much?

You don't have to pay.

Come on, you worked for it.

I had a nice evening.

- I did too.

- I'll show you out.

Bye.

By the way, what's your name?

- Piet.

- Bye, Piet.

His name is Piet.

I bet you didn't score tonight.

Wait until Sjaak hears.

Okay children, Minnie, Lisa, Hans,

Time to come in.

Jantje, you too.

Take your seat.

Children, today we have...

Dick...tension.

Write:

The butterflies...

No, no. Stop that!

What's all the noise?

What's this mess?

Headmistress,

you'll never guess what happened.

What happened?

Tell me, Miss Montessori.

I can't.

It's much too embarrassing.

Jantje...

Jantje...

...put his hand up my skirt.

Jantje, stand up.

Drop your trousers.

Bend over.

This will teach you,

you filthy boy.

It won't happen again.

It won't happen again.

There, I think that'll do.

Later...

Here. Clean up.

All right.

Thank you,

and until my next visit.

Jantje...

- Write more clearly in future.

- Yes.

Doctors...

- Want a bite?

- I've come for my money.

- Where's Sjaak?

- How should I know?

Got it?

Give it here.

Cow, the money is yours.

It's my money.

I'm keeping it.

- Hand it over.

- No.

Don't try that again.

You should take up Judo.

Mind your own business,

he's not your guy.

Dumb jerks.

Not so many at once, ma'am.

Think I'm a thief?

Take them.

- Ma'am...

- What are you looking at?

Creepy dike.

I put them in water.

I'm a domestic guy.

All those roses. You must be mad.

They must've cost a fortune.

- What are you doing tonight?

- Working...

Not tonight.

You're going out with me.

I have a business to run.

Close up shop.

We're going out.

What's up with her and grandpa?

She'll have an easy time.

It's getting serious

with you guys, isn't it?

Are you coming?

It's late.

- What's up with him?

- Nothing.

He's just another customer.

Who are you kidding?

You're in love.

In love?

Don't make me laugh.

I bet you leave the trade.

And I'll be on my own

with that prick, Sjaak.

- Why not leave him?

- And go where?

-You can get another.

-Like the guy upstairs?

I've had enough of that.

I need some peace.

MARRlAGE AGENCY

'THE LlNK'

Gentleman, 48 years old...

Committed elsewhere

two more years.

Elsewhere...

Unpretentious, honest.

Respectable man. Sturdy build.

With serious plans.

We'll take him.

He won't want me

when he knows what I do.

That's none of his business.

Write...

Dear Sir...

Comma.

I'm taking up my pen

to write to you.

I am a very young woman

who has been disappointed in love.

Yes.

Where you going?

- The letter?

- For the blood bank.

We're going to donate.

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Albert Mol

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Business Is Business" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 21 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/business_is_business_23107>.

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