Buster Page #5

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is so strong... #

That's them. It's gotta be.

You're right.

Cor blimey!

This is better

than a wet Wednesday

in Billingsgate Market, ain't it?

I ain't never seen

nothing as beautiful!

Where are they?

Yeah, it is.

Hey, Brucey!

How are you, eh?

It's good to see you!

Hello. Franny.

How are you doing, darlin'?

Welcome to Acapulco.

Come on. Let's go.

# ..Yes, you'll be going loco

down in Acapulco

# The magic down there is so strong

# Feel the pressure,

your back against the wall

# You're just about to fall

# If you're afraid to love,

afraid to take a chance

# You'd better hide your feelings,

get out while you can

# Cos you'll be going loco

down in Acapulco

# If you stay too long

# Yes, you'll be going loco

down in Acapulco

# The magic down there is so strong

# You can hear voices pleading

through those warm Latin nights

# Memories of lost and found,

leaving broken hearts

# All over town

# Cos you'll be going loco

down in Acapulco

# If you stay too long

# Yes, you'll be going loco

down in Acapulco

# The magic down there

is so strong. #

You can't get out now, Dad! I've

got lots and lots of sand on you.

I've buried you!

You reckon I can't get out, eh?

Yeah!

Not too rough!

Thanks a lot!

Hmm! Bruce!

It's too hot for all that.

Fancy a bit of suntan lotion,

Buster?

Nah, I don't want

none of that poofy stuff.

Besides you don't get

much the first day.

How about you, June?

Me and Buster, we've got good skin.

You won't keep it if you don't oil

it. It's not Clacton, you know.

Too bleeding right! You don't get

flies like this in Clacton!

If it was Clacton we could get

TCP from the chemist.

But it's not Clacton, is it?

Paradise in the sun -

that's what this is.

SPEAKS IN SPANISH

How much is it?

It is two dollars.

OK. Give me one dollar fifty.

How much you want to spend?

I don't really want it.

No, it's all right. No thanks.

What do you think

of it so far, June?

Fine.

It's not quite what I thought

it would be.

How did you think it was gonna be?

You know those hotels

on the front in Brighton -

The Metropole and The Grand?

Well, a bit like that really.

What? In Acapulco?

That's better.

All right, my love?

Mind if I loosen my tie?

Oi! What's all this? We didn't

order any of this clobber!

You've got to watch these wankers!

They bring you the cocktails free.

It's all part of the meal.

Why didn't they say so, then?

Cheers!

Ow! Ow!

They've put salt in the bastard!

They're supposed to put salt

in the bastard.

The idea is you sip it slowly

over the salt rim.

The Pauillac '53, Miguel.

From the Mouton-Rothschild Chateau.

A lovely bouquet!

You all right now, Buster?

Yeah, course I am - yeah.

Bleeding waiters - make me puke!

Good job they don't

speak no English, eh?

Would the senor care

for some McEwan's Export?

It isn't chilled, but the cellar

temperature is quite cool.

Very good, Miguel.

What are we going

to have to eat, Buster?

I dunno - you choose something.

The tortillas are fab.

They may be a bit spicy for you, but

me and Bruce think they're great.

We certainly do.

I can really recommend

the chilli con carne,

but it might be a bit spicy for you.

Ain't there no meat on the menu?

It is meat.

It's just sort of spiced up a bit.

I just want some steak and chips.

You don't have steak and chips

in Acapulco, June.

Yeah, well, I like steak

and chips. It's all I want.

It's not often

we've been able to afford it.

I've got some steak in the fridge.

If you want to share it

you can come with me.

June... June!

June darlin'!

Blimey! Are you sure these are all

your brothers and sisters, Maria?

Si, senor. Except for Pedro...

and Teresa.

All right. All right.

June, stop it! You're tickling!

Not till you tell me.

Stop it!

Tell me then.

Tell you what?

Where we're going.

When?

This afternoon.

I'm going to see Bruce.

I thought we was going out together.

You said we was.

That's why I let Maria bring

all them kids round here.

When did I say that?

Yesterday.

I don't remember.

Look, go buy yourself something.

I don't want any money.

I've got plenty of money.

Right. Let's hope it stays that way.

What do you mean? Has that ten

grand come from Switzerland yet?

No, it got lost.

Lost?!

Yes, lost. We got stuffed,

all right?

But who'd do that?

I dunno, June - someone somewhere.

It'll be all right.

Trust me. I'll work it out.

Ten thousand pounds - you lost

ten thousand pounds?!

Don't worry about the money.

Just keep enjoying yourself,

all right?

Don't wait up,

me and Bruce have got business.

Me and June are going through

250 a week out here.

Have you tried economising?

Christ! Look at that pair there!

You sound just like June's mother.

Really? I didn't know

she was fond of big tits!

Go on, look at the one in yellow.

Jesus Christ!

This is as good as St Tropez here.

God! They're enormous!

It must be all that fruit they eat.

Sex. I love it. I just love it!

You don't find tits

like that at Margate, my son!

You're not listening, Bruce.

How is it that a pair of knockers

are a lot more

interesting than Franny's...

that are lying on the bed at home

and much more available?

It's one of the wonders

of the world, that is.

Bruce...!

Cox's Pippins.

Tan-ger-ines!

Why doesn't Maria do the shopping?

I like it. I was good at it at home.

You're crackers, June.

I'm getting back in the taxi.

And for God's sake hurry up!

I want my margarita!

HE SPEAKS SPANISH

# Rolling, rolling, rolling... #

Bloody hell! Bruce!

Charlton Athletic won at Manchester

City. Eddie Firmani scored twice!

Bleeding fantastic!

THEY SING 'RAWHIDE' THEME SONG

SINGING DRUNKENLY

Good Lord, you're home!

That's it - yeah.

What are you gonna tell June?

Don't worry about my Juney.

I can handle her all right.

DOORBELL:

Hello, Juney. Me and Bruce have

been having business meetings.

That's right - yes.

Course you wouldn't understand it.

It's too hard for women, innit?

That's right, yes.

It's all right, June.

He's just overworked.

It don't taste the same

without brandy sauce.

Couldn't get it. We tried.

What's the point of Christmas

without pudding and brandy sauce?

Proper turkey,

like you get in MacFisheries.

The Queen, eh?

ALL:
Merry Christmas!

Only one thing wrong

with Her Majesty, though.

Her bleeding prisons!

June, where could you find better

to spend Christmas than this?

The sun, the sea, blue sky...!

I'll tell you, Bruce - London.

The snow and ice and fog

and the boozer.

And decent snout. No beggars

on the streets and bleeding flies!

People who speak the Queen's English

RETCHING:

Nicky...!

She's really hot.

Bloody hell! She's burning up!

We want to see the head honcho.

I've got a sick child here.

Are you listening?

Buster, don't. He's busy.

Leave off, June.

Look, stupido,

this little girl is ill!

Senor, all these people

are also ill. You must wait.

How can we wait?

She could be dead

before you get to her!

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