C.r.a.z.y. Page #2

It's the thought that counts.

I'll just return it, then.

Raymond, Antoine!

That's enough!

Christian! Supper's ready.

come on, boys. Let's eat.

- coming.

Gifted...

What do you think about that?

What did Mrs. What's-her-name

tell you?

I'm not allowed to say.

But she told Mom that if

the good Lord gave me a gift,

I had to use it.

That I could help a lot of people,

even save them.

Tell him to think of him.

Think of Uncle Lucien.

He cut himself eating steak.

They're not going to start calling

for every little booboo?

Turn that music down.

All I had to do

was silently recite the secret

little prayers imparted to me

by Mrs. What's-her-name,

which consisted not of asking,

but of commanding God to heal.

Remember, you can't use

your gift for personal gain.

Or to harm others.

What a shame.

What's he saying?

He's not allowed to say.

Stop it, will you?

From now on, it'll cost a dime

every time you pick your nose.

You'll be rich.

You must know

how ketchup's made by now,

you've been reading the damn label

for half an hour.

Another pest

who just cut himself shaving.

Okay, I'll tell him.

Uncle Lucien's bleeding

has stopped.

Yes?

Well, I'll be damned.

Great. He'll be thrilled.

Yes. Thank you.

What is it?

Your lucky brother

is going to summer camp.

- What?!

I wasn't allowed to go at his age!

You got yours.

Stop complaining.

We've never sent our children

to camp.

He'll sleep there?

Of course. He'll make friends,

have lots of fun...

It'll be a good experience

for him.

- He'll always remember it.

- I don't wanna go.

Oh, come on.

I don't wanna go.

I don't wanna go!!!

God, please don't let it happen.

Go to sleep.

God, please,

don't let it show.

I'll never miss mass again.

Midnight mass

was so short and sweet

now that I'd become an atheist.

I'd kept my promise, though.

I'd never missed mass...

midnight mass.

Once a year.

It made her happy.

It kept his mouth shut.

You dragging your trash around,

brother-in-law?

It's your present.

Well, if it isn't Zac!

What, no girlfriend yet?

Christmas 1975

Nice paper.

Every year, I told them:

No Christmas wrapping paper

for my birthday presents, okay?

That's not what matters.

After the drum set, accordion,

guitar and violin...

a banjo.

You said to surprise you.

It's so hard to know

what teenagers want nowadays.

You try to please them...

Some fantasies

are worth keeping.

Merry Christmas!

Happy New Year!

You know what time it is,

Raymond?

You're late.

I was starting to worry.

- Hi. I'm Doris.

- Good evening.

- Merry Christmas.

- Take off your boots.

- How are you?

- Hi, Dad.

- Merry Christmas.

- Pleased to meet you.

I'm Raymond's mother.

My family always

appreciated gourmet food.

Did you at least make a wish?

It won't come true,

he can't get it up yet.

My brothers

hadn't changed a bit.

Dad, Zac gave him the finger!

- Except my darling Yvan.

- Such brotherly love!

And how polite

they are in public.

Turn that music down.

Every Christmas,

the bastard barely stayed an hour.

Just long enough

to stuff himself...

and to piss me off.

Here, buy whatever you want.

Happy birthday.

Wait.

I loved daydreaming

about my mother.

Picturing myself wealthy,

so that, one day,

I could spoil her.

Merry Christmas!

It's beautiful. Thank you.

Oh, what a lovely dress.

My cousin Brigitte

had just dropped out of school

to devote herself

to social dancing full-time.

At the age of 15.

I can dance too, you know!

But it's not my specialty.

Back by popular request...

No getting around it.

It's your birthday!

- You've really changed.

- Yeah, you too.

This is my boyfriend, Paul.

My cousin, Zac.

He has his driver's license!

I'm stealing one.

- You don't smoke?

- Never touch the stuff.

Good thing. lf it was up to him,

he'd be smoking nonstop.

We go to the movies,

he wants to smoke;

we go skating,

he wants to smoke...

You skate? Roller-skate?

The guys' turn, full blast,

music blaring, really stoned -

you let yourself go...

you can hear everything,

and feel like everything around you

is moving in slow-motion,

like in a movie.

A stoner movie, yeah.

Try it.

Give me a shotgun.

No way.

Are you nuts?

I burned my tongue last time.

I thought of you

and it stopped burning.

He has a gift

for healing burns.

- What?

- And staunching blood.

It's true! Tell him!

My mother got that

into the whole family's head.

You stop your girlfriend's

monthly bleeding, too?

Idiot.

That's it, make a fool of me.

I don't believe in that anymore.

Sorry.

That doesn't mean

you've lost your blessing.

You blessed fool!

You want a shotgun?

Boy, have you changed!

Well, well...

if it isn't the lovely Michelle.

- Hi, Mr. Beaulieu.

- Hi.

I'll finish up later.

No problem.

- Is she really on the pill?

- Enough about my cousin.

I'm not the one

who wants to sleep with her.

That's the last time

I confide in you.

Why are the prettiest girls

always the dumbest?

You've never seen her.

I've seen her picture.

Enough said.

Don't be jealous.

You're dumb too.

I see her once a year. How am

I supposed to sleep with her?

Anyway, she's got a boyfriend.

Older. As dumb as she is.

Not as dumb as you?

Don't.

It'll ruin our friendship.

That's not what you said

last week.

Stop it.

See what happens?

Absolutely nothing!

Don't tell me he groped her.

You done imitating

that f***ing fag?

Huh?! You're making us

look like a bunch of idiots!

Get outta here!

It's my room too!

c'mon, Toto,

ask him for an autograph.

Got a problem?

No.

Having a crazy brother

also had its advantages.

- Always ready to help...

- Pay up, you little bastard.

... for the modest sum of $2.

We were here first.

Shut up, f*ggot.

What did you call him?

Apologize.

Apologize

and switch back to his show.

Apologize, I said!!!

It's okay, Dad.

Go on!!

Sorry.

What's for dinner?

What happened to you?

Just a hockey fight.

- Didn't you have practice today?

- Yeah, yeah.

You fought with a teammate?

It was just a scuffle.

Didn't even drop my gloves.

- Who with?

- Tremblay.

You got beaten up

by Tremblay's little fag?

What, you four-eyed fag?

What's with you always

calling each other fags?

You'd swear we're nothing

but a bunch of fairies!

Please...

anything but that.

Sorry about last night.

You know I don't like you talking

to your brother that way.

Yeah...

Okay, see you at work.

careful, now.

Please let me bump into them.

What're you doing here?

- Just in the neighborhood.

- God, you've changed.

What'd you do to your hair?

It's cool.

Thanks.

You alone?

- No, I'm with...

my new dance partner.

He's Italian.

Thank you.

This is my cousin, Zac.

Okay, well...

I'll be off.

change... change...

I would be cured of my asthma...

if I only managed to get through.

For the second time of my life...

I was declared clinically dead...

for three seconds.

Thank God you were dedicated

to Virgin Mary.

I can't believe it.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes