Caddyshack II

Did you guys hear

what happened to Mary Ellen Tobin?

Total humiliation.

She found out that her boyfriend

is part Italian.

I bet I know which part, too.

I've always wondered.

What are you, Kate?

Me?

Erm, we're New Yorkers, originally.

Well, Miffy tells me that the two of you

room together at Radcliffe.

Five iron.

I was at Harvard Law.

I'm very surprised we never met.

Well, I just transferred last year

from Michigan.

I knew someone

who once went to Michigan.

I think it was our maid.

Kate, I am just kidding.

- Outstanding.

- Marvellous.

Marvellously outstanding.

Kate.

Caddy, could you please run

and get me a diet root beer?

Er... The nearest soda machine

is way back at the snack bar.

Er, yeah,

I know where the soda machine is.

Snotty little b*tch.

I may never come back.

I know you thlnk

I'm no match for you, baby

You Ilke makln'It rough on me

don't ya?

My, my

Back to the shack

Huh, huh, yeah

And nothlng sults me better than that

If tlme has taught me anythlng

Got to learn to be the ball

And I can't keep

from laughlng at It all

I'm gonna laugh

I'm golng all the way

Sooner or later gotta love somebody

Don't care how long It takes

You can turn up the heat

But I'm playlng It cool

I know It's hard to belleve

I aln't nobody's fool

- I'm golng all the way

- All the way

- Sooner or later gotta love somebody

- I don't care

Don't care how long It takes...

Ah, good morning, Mr and Mrs Mannings.

I've not gone to school

Baby, Ilke It or not

I aln't nobody's fool

Come on, baby. Come on, baby.

Come on, baby.

Yeah.

Excuse me. Pardon me.

Excuse me. Pardon me. No, no!

My halluclnatlon

May come as some surprlse

You may try to deny It

You're amazed when the clown

slaps you In the face

Leaves you dumbfounded there

In hls way, yeah

- I'm golng all the way

- Yeah

- Sooner or later gotta love somebody

- Love somebody

Don't care how long It takes

Llke a shock to the heart

I've got news for you

Maybe I'm not so smart

But I'm nobody's fool

- I'm golng all the way

- Oh, yeah

Hup. Excuse me.

- I'm golng all the way

- I'm nobody's fool, baby...

One diet root beer.

This... was really good.

Thank you.

I won't be a caddy all my life. I'm

going to car-wash school in the fall.

Back to work.

Ah-ha.

Why don't you girls run along

and I'll take care of the caddies?

- Thank you, Todd.

- Great round, Kate.

Thanks.

All right, hunchbacks, listen up.

The club recently purchased 50

Cushman electric Golf Master golf carts,

which means that once they're delivered

your services as caddies

will no longer be required.

Does this mean that we're fired?

That's very good.

Pass it on to your brethren, won't you?

Just so there are no hard feelings

I'll see what I can do

about letting you keep those coveralls.

Why don't you ask your father

to join Bushwood?

Imagine how much fun we could have.

All the tournaments we could win.

Oh, that would be great.

I would love that.

But I'm not sure

how my father would feel about it.

Oh. Well, maybe if he saw how dignified

and elegant everything is here...

Dignified and elegant.

Yeah. He'd fit right in.

Well, make up your mind.

You want to play or you want to fold?

Either you play or fold. If you're not

gonna play or fold, you're gonna sit.

Between me and you,

there's more comfortable places to sit.

Hello. Did you pass away?

Come on, hurry up. I'm talking to you.

Are you still living?

Blink twice if you can see me.

I should call you. Low-life phoneys

is what I should call you.

I'm out.

How do you like that?

Wiped out again.

What are you doing gambling on a

job site anyway? I should fire you all.

I'm gonna do something better.

Make you go back to work.

OK, sweetheart, blow the whistle.

For 20 years

he thinks I speak Spanish.

- You don't speak Spanish?

- No, but I listen fluently.

God bless him. He gives that

cockamamie Spanish hell, doesn't he?

- His cheques don't bounce.

- You got that right.

Jack, why do you let him win?

- How did you know?

- I saw your hand.

You had him beat. You had a full house.

I got a full house.

He had a real full house.

Every time I walk in there

I see 24 kids.

You're a soft touch.

Don't tell him that.

I don't want him to know.

If he thinks I'm a wonderful person

he'll try to become my partner.

- Hello. What are you doing here?

- Hey, Jack.

Take chances, I'm insured.

What the hell is happening down there?

You in that tractor!

Can you hear me?

Not those people again!

I told them, you want to save a crummy

house that's about to fall down,

come over to my place.

Sometimes I'm tempted to say "To hell

with it, it's not my field".

But this is your field.

You bought this field. And that field.

You must be worth about $50 million.

It's nobody's business.

I'm worth a lot more than that.

- See you downstairs.

- Wait for me.

Let me talk to 'em. I hate those people!

Then hurry up.

Hey, what the hell are you doing here?

This is private property.

Please let me handle this.

It requires a little diplomacy and tact.

Lady, please, get lost.

People are working. Can't you see that?

You look like you never had a job.

- Mr Hartounian, I presume?

- Yes.

We represent

the Historical Preservation Society.

I have a temporary injunction...

restraining you from demolishing any

structures on the Armstrong Estate...

until the City Planning Commission

rules on our appeal.

What are you talking about?

This is nothing but an old dump!

This building is over 70 years old.

It's part of our heritage.

What are you talking about?

This is a garage, can't you see that?

Do you come from

a long line of mechanics?

It was a carriage house.

It's one of the original buildings

on what was the Armstrong Estate,

the property line of which

ran down to this brook.

Does this look like a brook to you?

This is not a brook, lady,

this is a sewer.

Originally it was a brook.

Originally your family comes from

monkeys. What's that got to do with it?

This property has been laying here,

dead, for 25 years, do you know that?

All of a sudden, I buy it,

I try to put up some decent housing

that working people can afford,

and what do I get? A historical society.

Out the bullshit!

You can't stand working people

living in this neighbourhood.

I'm not going to argue with you. If you

want us to move you'll have to move us.

No problem. Rayette!

Let's go!

Come on! Come on!

Run!

I run and I run and I run and I run

I can't stay away, darlln'

I run and I run

and I run and I run...

Look, Pop, if someone asks you,

we winter in the Bahamas, somewhere in

the Hamptons and don't mention Jersey.

I'm only doing this because I love you.

That's the only reason.

If it was up to me,

I'd rather have a hernia operation.

Come on, Pop, joining Bushwood

is something you should want to do.

You worked hard for what you've got.

You deserve the best country club.

This is the best?

They're a bunch of snobs, that's all.

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