Carter & June Page #6

---

Besides I do not have time

for stupid stripper sh*t now.

Call Albert's cousins.

See if I can unload

this sh*t on him.

I need cash, fast.

Oh, also, the ice

machine is broken again.

You need to make three

more cases of Jack Daniels

fall off the back of a truck.

And the men's bathroom

has gone down.

(phone ringing)

That's Reed.

Of course it is.

Get out.

Hold please.

[Reed] How dare

you put me on hold,

you cock sucker!

Oh relax, your

money's on its way.

That's not what

I'm calling about

you bedazzled f***.

I just lost something

much more important.

Go on.

Who's the dude with a bike

who just looked like he

just f***ed a light socket?

Oh that, that's

Reverend Lucas Jenks.

He's our personal pastor.

He's starting a

church for sinners.

[June] He's come

to the right place.

[Lucas] Amen.

Ah, yes!

Woo!

Yes!

Check it out, good as cash.

Well congrats, man.

You're rich and you're not

gonna get raped to death

in Angola, so that's a win.

(laughing) Well this

money isn't for us.

It's for the Lord.

That's right.

Mhmm.

All right.

Some cocky piece of sh*t

goddamn redneck had the

gall to clean out my safe!

And you will be

calling me why?

You're going to find them

and you're going to

exact retribution

on my behalf.

Well if they're

local I can find them

but what's in it for me?

F*** you!

You get to stay in business,

that's what's in it for you.

Okay then, 10 percent

of whatever I recover

would be fine,

thank you so much.

You are such a giver.

Sucking dick make

you deaf, boy, huh?

I said f*** and you!

Really?

15 percent, why you

are so generous.

15 percent.

But listen here.

There are photos in

that envelope too.

Ooh, what kind of photos?

Let's just say if

those photos go wide,

we both go to jail.

Boy, you f*** me.

So help me god, I

will ram a SWAT team

so far up that hole of yours

you will spit cop!

You do have a way with words.

I'll call you when

I know something.

Dolores!

Okay, this is what we do.

I want guys on the

street asking questions.

And Gill?

Yeah.

I want you to follow

that cop Twitty everywhere.

[Gill] Consider it done.

Who's handling

the investigation?

I believe

Detective Johnson is.

Johnson, sh*t.

Motherf***er's been

dying to put me in jail.

Someone stole

the bonds from Reed

that I was gonna steal.

Turns out, Reed was

keeping something else

in that safety deposit box.

That little b*tch Caitlin

must have been planning

on double-crossing

me this whole time.

Still, it had to be

a two person job.

Dirty business, stealing.

Well,

can't convert the

bonds till tomorrow.

There's really nothing

left to do tonight.

What do you think?

Hootenanny?

Hootenanny.

(country music)

I wanna go where my

country girl goes

Like where my

green grasses grow

I feel at ease with

my country girl, yeah

She knows how to groove me

I'll take you back

bout a year before

She's on earth

(slow country music)

What if I told

you I was pregnant?

(laughing)

That's a little fast, you

know, biologically speaking.

Just testing you.

I was never very

good at tests.

But you're very clever.

(laughing)

You'd be a great father.

Oh, come on.

[June] What?

That's crazy.

You're so good with Ethan.

He's a great kid.

I'm nobody's father.

I don't even know what

the f*** that word means.

I never knew my dad.

I'm in love with you.

And I love Ethan.

And when I see

you guys together,

it's f***ing, it's amazing.

No kid should have me as a dad,

it's not fair.

Yeah.

[Lucas] We need the

rest of the bonds.

For the Lord is good.

And his love endures.

Psalm Chapter 100 verse five.

We already have

100,000 dollars.

I mean isn't that enough

to start a church?

Of course, I think it is.

But this ain't me

talking, Brother Jason.

It's the Lord telling

me what's what

and all I'm doing is

passing along the word.

Think about it

this way, honey baby.

They're bad people.

And they're gonna do bad

things with that money.

They are.

We're gonna use

that money for good.

We will.

Mhmm.

Brother Jason?

The Lord needs you.

He needs you to go

get that there money

so that we can

build us a hot damn,

forgive me Lord, awesome church.

That's right.

(light music)

(motorcycle revving)

[Gill] Ain't no

way an honest cop

can have a wife that hot.

Hey Carter?

Carter?

(knocking)

Only you would forget

your keys after leaving.

Whoah.

Where's Carter?

What the f*** are you doing?

The Lord's spoken, June.

We need the rest of that

money for our church.

What?

You're trying to

steal money I need

to get my son back for Jesus?

Don't listen to her lies.

I'm not lying.

This is important, June.

God told him!

What am I supposed to do?

Wait.

Hey, what are you

doing, what are you doing?

I'm just turning on the light.

Turn yourself in.

Confess that you shot the girl.

Go to jail and pray

for forgiveness.

The Lord don't

want him to pray.

He wants the cash!

And I don't want to

have to hurt you, darling.

But those bonds belong to God.

Now give them to me!

Give me the money, June!

It belongs to the Lord now!

Okay, okay.

Over there, you a**hole.

I'm rich!

I mean Jesus is rich!

You are taking

the only hope I have

of getting my son

back because your wife

and this f***ing bullshitter

told you to.

This is wrong, you know that.

The Lord will anoint

you with everlasting life.

What does that mean?

Where's Carter?

I don't f***ing

know, he's gone.

He's gone?

You guys are literally

the stupidest people

I've ever f***ing met

and I'm from Oklahoma.

I got it, I got it.

You just tell Carter he

better not follow us.

This money belongs to God now.

Amen.

Whoah, whoah.

Oh sh*t!

(bashing)

(gun firing)

Hey, I'm an

officer of the law.

You're all under arrest.

One more word out of you,

you're gonna be just

another dead dirty NOLA cop,

do you understand me fucktard?

Yes or no?

I got this one trying

to run out the back, boss.

You're Spencer Rabbit.

Yeah, no sh*t.

Mr. Rabbit, my name

is Reverend Lucas Jenks.

Perhaps you heard of me.

You are the talk of

the town, Reverend.

[Jason] Hey, that's not yours.

All right, little girl.

Where are the photos?

What photos?

The photos that are

supposed to be with the bonds,

don't be a shithead!

I don't know, maybe

Carter has them.

All right, well where

the f*** is Carter?

Baby girl, you have officially

gotten on my last nerve.

Let's all move this melodrama

down to the hole, shall we?

Come on!

[Lucas] Mr. Rabbit,

I'd like to talk to you

about a business

proposition for the Lord.

How about setting up a

church down in either uptown

or in the bywater.

And now, there's some

circumstances that I'd like

- to talk to you about.

- Oh sh*t.

I have good news, I am

in possession of the bonds

and the photos.

However, I'm afraid I'm gonna

have to restructure our deal.

Boy, if you f*** me,

It's going to go

something like this.

In addition to the 15

percent of the bonds,

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes