Cas & Dylan Page #5

- Oh, I'm good.

I'm just browsing--

- You know

Shania's "Come on Over"

isn't just the

best-selling album of all

time by a female musician

in any genre. It was also

the best selling country

album ever. Humph. A lot

of people think no way,

it must have been Garth

Brooks or Wynonna Judd.

But I'm like, it's Shania,

all the way. We also share

the same zodiac sign. Oh

excuse me.

Hey!

- You are going to thank me.

- Okay.

- You got

some money on you?

- Yeah,

in my left pocket.

- Yeah... I'm a little

behind on rent. (whispers)

- Okay. Are you

sure you don't need help

with anything?

- Yeah, no, I'm good.

- These, these are

pink flamingos from Miami. I

guarantee you're gonna be

dancing 'till the sun comes up.

- Oh wow.

- What's that now?

- Well, look at you.

- Coffee. Black.

No sugar. Oh-- I got

something for

Jennifer too.

- No.

- Figures. Hey, Cas,

promise me one thing. No

"goodbye sweet world".

It's so overused. And I'd

hate for you to go

out on a clich.

- I thought you were

writing next year's masterpiece.

- I am! Don't worry,

I've been writing it. I--

I just-- I wrote this bit

last night. Wanna hear it?

Okay. Cool. (clears

throat) "From within the

catacombs of her heart was

this secret flame of fury

that could not be

concealed. Like the baby

orca, when it first--"

- Wait a minute. Wait

a minute. Wait a minute.

Start again.

- Okay. 'Kay. "From

within the catacombs of

her heart was a secret

flame of fury that could

not be concealed.

Like the baby orca--"

- No no. Can I

ask you a question?

- Yeah.

- What are you

writing about?

- Oh. Uh, okay, well

if you'll let me read.

- Well I, I've let you

read. Twice. And I still

don't have any idea what

your point is or, or if

there's a throughline

or anything.

- Who made you the

expert on this? I'm the

writer, you're a doctor.

Uhn. You don't tell me how

to write, I don't tell

you how to doctor.

- Can I tell you

how to get in the car?

- Drink your coffee.

It'll make you feel better.

- I want you to know

that, that feeling you get

when you have a cup of

coffee and it's not good,

you know. It's lacking.

- Yeah. Yeah.

- This is... This is

the exact opposite of that.

- Good thing I

only gave you one.

- What?

- Nothing.

- Boy. Are you hot? I

mean are you feeling hot?

I feel hot. I feel like

I'm burning up. (laughing)

I feel like I'm getting

incinerated. It's really hot.

- Should I uh, should

I take the top down, or?

- Oh yeah! Oh yes!

What a good idea!

- Yeah?

- Really!

- Yeah?

- You know, that's why

I like you. That's exactly

why I like you because

you have some really good

ideas. Really

fresh, you know?

- Yeah?

- Fresh ideas. That's

a fresh idea. Fresh.

- You want

me to drive too?

So how you

feeling Dr. Pepper?

- This wind is

so fresh on my face.

- I decided that

going out west with you is

destiny. I was meant to do

that. I mean what are the

chances I would meet you

at the exact same time

that Cresthill Books

finally went through. It's

a sign, right? I see

some good things ahead.

- You wanna

know something?

- What?

- You are

absolutely right!

- No.

- Mmhmm.

- Really?

- I feel great!

- Good! You should

let is out, Cas. C'mon.

- Aaaaoooo!! Hahahahaa!

- Really? That's it?

- What?

- What? That's

all you got? Come on!

Diaphragm. (screams)

(both screaming

and laughing)

That feel good?

- Hmmm. Pft. I'm

a little dehydrated.

(music)

I need

something to drink.

- Yeah?

- You want anything?

- I'm good.

- Ohhh. "Are you

married?" "No." "Ooo!"

(Cell phone dialing and ringing)

- Hey, this is Denise! I'm not

in. You know what to do.

- Hey Denise,

my name is Dylan,

I'm a friend of a friend

of yours, uh, Cas Pepper.

I guess he could

have been your boyfriend

or like cousin, maybe. Uh,

it might be really good

for you to get in touch

with him or I can try you

again. He just seems like

he could kind of use a

friend right now, maybe.

(music)

Miles and miles and miles

Before we reach the sand

Cacti and cacti for miles

Miles of dry land, dry land

We gonna make it...

- Dylan! Dylan,

we overslept.

(Dylan groans)

We overslept. Get up.

- What? You're old.

Don't you people wake up

at like 5am.

- What do you

mean 'you people'?

Once we feel the sea breeze

My-my-my-my-my lover,

my maker

My breaker

Take me by the hand

We could go walking

for miles

Once we reach the sand,

the sand

We gonna make it,

ohh we gonna make it

We gonna take it

Ohh we gonna take it easy

- Okay, wish me luck.

- Good luck.

(clears throat)

- Can I help you?

- Yes. Dylan Morgan.

I have a 4:
30 with Susan

Crosby to talk

about my manuscript.

- Hmmm. You said 4:30

- Yup.

- That's weird. 'Kay.

Susan, I have a

Dylan Morgan here. Un hun.

Title.

- Um, Action Romanture.

- Action

Romanture. (giggles)

Okay, thank you Susan. Mn.

There seems to have

been a mix-up. Cresthill

Books passed on

your manuscript.

- I-- I called though.

I have a meeting.

- She had a 4:
30 with

Dillon Shaughnessy.

- No, Um--

- Well Dylan, Dillon. It's

an understandable mix-up.

- I don't find it

that understandable. I

came all the way

from Winnipeg!

- Oh... Pft. Sorry.

- If I could just

speak with Mrs. Crosby for

five minutes.

- I'm afraid that's impossible.

- If I could talk to

her about my work, I mean,

it's deep. You know,

maybe Susan doesn't have

enough-- (taps on

her head) Y'know...

- No. No,

I'm afraid I don't know.

Cresthill Books.

Okay. Buh-bye. Yeah.

Yeah sure. Sure, sure, sure.

I'll put you right through.

Cresthill Books. Peter! Susan

has been trying to get ahold

of you for ages. We loved

it! Oh yeah, yeah. I'll

put you through.

- What happened?

- Wouldn't even see me.

Cas? Hey! What

are you doing? Cas!

- Excuse me.

We're here to

see Ms. Susan Crosby.

- Uh, if this is about her

manuscript, Cresthill

Books passed.

- I hear you, and we'd

just like to see Ms.

Crosby for five minutes.

I think that's fair.

- Susan doesn't see anyone

without an appointment.

I think that's fair.

You were saying you

stayed the night so...

- You do know that

you're being unreasonable.

- Okay. It's not gonna

happen, all right? But

thank you. Please submit

again. (ON PHONE) Sorry.

No it's fine I'm just at work.

- My name is Dr. Cas

Pepper. This woman is my

patient, she has high

blood pressure. If she

strokes and dies I will

see to it that you

personally are charged

with at least manslaughter

and perhaps murder.

- Your syntax is

ordinary at best. There

are factual

inconsistencies

everywhere. There's no

throughline. No point of

view. And it's completely

unfocused, impersonal, and

inauthentic. You have no

connection to the material

and it reads that way.

- Oh.

- I will take

the phone back now.

- Oh, Dylan. It was

your first book. And it

was your first

publishing company.

- Yeah, but she said

everything you said so--

Who am I kidding?

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