Cats & Dogs Page #4

Attention, employees.

Work quickly.|Only seven months until Christmas.

-Mr. Mason!|-Move. Back to work.

-Sir.|-Get a life.

Out of my way.|No lunch for you.

Mr. Mason!

-Morning, sir.|-Nice hat.

-How you feeling?|-Move.

-Hello, sir.|-That's me.

Not an evil cat bent on|taking over the world.

Out of my way.

Factory employees, congratulations.

This factory has been|accident-free for 45 minutes.

Sir! Mr. Mason.

-Sir.|-Get the door.

Nice dress.

-Can I get you anything?|-Sushi and cream.

Close the door.

Attention.

Attention, human workers.

This is your employer...

. . .Mr. Mason.

Effective immediately,|you are all fired.

That's right. Fired!

Go home now. Do not ask why.

You are to blame.

Unless you have a dog.|Then blame him.

In fact, kick him when you get home.

That is all.

Cats rule.

Now, the next phase of my plan.

Scotty?

I have a package for you.

Wait. Where'd she go?|In or out? In or out?

Honey, honey.

You'll never believe this.|A breakthrough.

I am hours away from--

Mom, Dad! Check it out!

Tickets to a game tonight.

-What?|-That is so great.

Uruguay versus Chad.

You never entered a contest.

Can we go? Please?|Please, can we go?

Me?

Please, I really want to go. Come on.

Hurry, buckle up!|We don't want to be late!

Okay. Hey, I know.

-The birds have left the nest.|-Go again.

The jelly is out of the doughnut.

-What are you saying?|-The family has gone.

Hey, Lou.

It's you. Where have you been?

Around.

This week's been amazing.|I got to beat up a kitten.

I'm on wet food.

-And Scott says I'm his best friend.|-Terrific.

Don't tell anyone.

Butch wouldn't like it.|He gets mad.

Yeah, I know. But he's not mad.

Sometimes mad is|a way of hiding. . .

-. . .how sad you are.|-What? Why would he be sad?

It's not my place to say.|But a person really hurt him once.

Poor Butch.

Here we are.|I said I'd get us here.

I hope Mbuto plays.|He's the best one-legged forward ever.

-Is this the right place?|-Where are all the tailgaters?

Are we early? Nobody around.

That'll make us first in line|for chili dogs.

Chili dog! Chili dog!

How much do I owe you?

I'm sorry. Didn't catch it.

-Hello.|-No charge!

-What?|-What is it?

-Oh, my God!|-Take it back.

Cats rule, cats rule

Oh, yeah, we kick butt

Kid.

Lou!

Butch.

What's up?

Professor's done,|I filed my report and. . . .

Kid. . .

. . .they're impressed.

They wanted me to give you this.

But this is for. . . .

When this job's over,|you've a spot at the academy.

You pulled it off, kid.|Good work.

I get to be a real agent like you?

Well, you can try.

-Partners!|-Don't wet the paper yet.

But if you make it,|think of all the places you'll see.

Maybe Burma. Yeah.

Or Denmark. What was her name?

Or Pasadena.

Wait. So I wouldn't stay here.

You go where they need you.

-Bogey in the wire.

It's a calico.|Should I take him?

Negative. Me and the kid got it.

Yeah!

My last job. Deliver this tape,|and I'm off to Jamaica.

-What's this?|-Get off me.

All right, you got me.

Stop. Please don't pull|on the duct tape!

Hello. Is this on?

Closer! Turn it over!|Where did you come from?

Hello, my puny-minded|dog-faced opponents.

What? Yes, it's on.

The red light's blinking.

I'm sure you've wondered...

...about the identity of|who will defeat you.

Who it is that possesses|the intellect to win...

...in this chess game|of wits and might.

It is I!

Recognize these humans?

If you want to see them|alive again...

...bring the formula|and all notes...

...regarding Brody's research|to the Ninth Street Pier at midnight.

If you refuse, well, they|will be put to sleep!

Hold that still!

You have until midnight to comply.

-We're gonna save them, right?|-This is over our heads.

-You calling headquarters?|-No, we're going there.

Now we can push the big button.|Hang on.

-Nav systems.|-Check.

-GPS.|-Check.

Raising anchors. We're go for launch.

Hold onto your tail, kid!

Velocity at 625 feet per second.

You are clear for EVA.

Canine transport|loading at platform two.

282nd Airborne Chihuahuas,|report to the briefing room.

This is it, kid. Welcome to HQ.

Roll over!

Roll over! Sit!

Spaying and neutering|reversal procedures on level three.

-For defensive purposes, of course.|-Oh.

Of course.

Personnel are required|to curb themselves.

Remember to scoop your poop.

Testing, testing.

You've reached headquarters.|Log in.

Tiger, what are you doing?

Bad dog!

Recognize these humans?

If you want to see them again,|bring the formula...

...and all notes|regarding Brody's research...

... to the Ninth Street Pier|at midnight. If you refuse...

... they will be put to sleep.

Assemble the delegates.

Order! Order, please.

Delagates, please! Order!

We cannot give up the formula.|Sacrifice the Brody family.

Nein! Lives are at stake.|We cannot deem them expendable.

Delegates, please! Order!

I must have order!

Please, no Frisbee!

Steve, crowd control.

Sit!

Now then, delegates.|It's time to vote.

Wait! Can I say something first?

Kid, quiet!

I was told it was an agent's job|to protect people.

Delegates, it's time.|Family or formula.

No! Wait. Wait!

Just minutes ago...

... the Council voted to|sacrifice the family...

... to safeguard humanity against|the cat threat forever.

For Canine News Network,|this is Wolf Blitzer.

Poor kid.

I need some equipment, guys.

-Hold on a second, kid.|-No!

-Hold it.|-They can't do this.

-You should've fought for me!|-What good would it do?

"Man's best friend."|History 101 , remember?

Here's lesson two.|We protect and work for them.

We tolerate that stupid|baby-talk crap.

Then they go to college. . .

. . .and dump you with an old lady|who can't throw a ball!

You blame my family for what|some boy did to you?

Look, kid. I'm sorry it|played out like this. . .

. . .but it's over. We're shut down.

Don't be scared, Scotty.|Everything will be okay.

I'm not scared, Mom.

It's all right. Only natural.

-We'll be okay.|-Mom, really, I'm okay.

You're trying to be brave.

-It's okay.|-Mom--

Scotty, don't be scared!

-I am your rock!|-Please.

Who kidnapped us,|Uruguay or Chad?

I heard what happened.|How's Lou?

-I told him not to get attached.|-"An agent focuses. . .

. . .only on the mission.

-That's why my family didn't love me."|-We all have sob stories.

Now he has his.

-I have to go.|-I said go before we left.

So you brought the research.

Foolish puppy.

He took the research.

Lou.

Butch, are you there?

Lou's in trouble at the pier!

Dock 14. Hurry!

Lou!

I thought they would let my family go.

How many dogs does it take|to overthrow mankind?

Just one stupid puppy.

Where is my family?!

Oh, they're alive.

For now.

But it won't matter--

This isn't NASCAR!

I've seized the formula. . .

. . .and in hours, I'll reverse it. . .

. . .giving me. . .

... the power to make humans...

How can I gloat gleefully|when you drive like a chimpanzee?!

I will make all of humanity|violently allergic to your kind.

And when you're all despised|by those you protect...

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