CB4 Page #5

Dad! Daddy! Hello! This is CB4.

Ben! It's just my kid.

Go ahead.

Stop playin' me like a sucker.

I want my CB4, you hear me?

# Cos you're goin'on a long hike

# Off a cliff, I'm drivin'you over

# Now you're there

wit'your four-leaf clover

# Float like a cannonball

Sting like a shark

# I'm the nigga waitin'for you

in the dark

# Waitin' to rob you

Waitin' to beat you

# A bullet in the head

is how I'll greet you

# Flat on her back

I gave her some crack

# It's ten o'clock

Do you know where your momma's at?

I might have something.

# Straight outta Locash

Yo, this is MC Gusto of Cell Block 4.

Tonight we're performing

at the Jackson Theatre.

Those motherfuckers!

Look at this punk! He's walkin'

like me. He's tryin' to be me!

I didn't know you do rap records, Gusto!

That's bad, man.

That ain't him.

Stop bein' ignorant.

Bust a little rhyme for me, man.

Come on! Go, go!

Look, man, there's only one Gusto

and he ain't no rapper!

That was a brand-new single

from Cell Block 4,

CB4 for those who know,

from their album Straight Outta Locash.

Why don't you holler at my

WWWW listeners? Give 'em a holler.

Yo, what's up to the hard core?

Peace to all the Nubians filled

with the new black consciousness.

Yeah, the darker the berry,

the sweeter the juice.

I'm lovin' this.

Why don't we go to the phone lines,

talk to some brothers, let them

get to know you straight up in person?

We got Susan from Gardena.

Why don't you holler at CB4?

This question's for Dead Mike.

I was reading Right On.

Your birthday's comin' up.

I was wondering,

what's your favourite dessert?

Sister, my sister.

It is uplifting to know

that a sister such as yourself

still takes pride in her race.

It's ice cream. Did you know

a black man invented ice cream?

No, no! How the hell a black man gonna

invent ice cream in hot-ass Africa?

- Tell me that.

- Ice cream, Africa.

That's a great concept, guys.

I'm liking that. Next call.

OK, I got a question

for this so-called Gusto.

If you set someone up

for the police then stole his name,

didn't even say "excuse me",

wouldn't you expect the injured party

to bust out of jail, hunt you down

- and beat you like the dog you are?

- Nah!

The chickens have come home to roost.

Open C block, comin' up.

- Hey, baby.

- Single file, girls.

Walk.

Girls.

What are you doin'?

I'm gettin' us outta here. Be quiet!

- I'm in this one.

- You gonna have to go!

Get in there.

Man, you crazy with that

"I don't eat pork" sh*t.

Personally, I'll eat a pig's ass

if they cook it right.

Beloved, it's against

everything I now believe.

You see, pork is the white man,

and the white man is pork.

If you spell "white man" backwards

what does it spell? Pork!

If you can't see that,

they've got you brainwashed, brother.

I must be brainwashed then.

You mean to tell me

if you was thrown outta your apartment

and a pig offered to pay your rent,

- you wouldn't take the money?

- No.

Sh*t. I'd be

a-money takin' from a pig.

That's the difference

between you and me.

I got a place

and you live with your mother.

Would you stop it? Albert!

- Just a sip.

- I'm gonna smack you.

Sh*t. More for me then.

Albert, I don't like this scene.

I definitely don't like

what's happening to you.

Just because I got a little bit of cash,

why does everybody gotta start buggin'?

No, no. We are not bugging.

It's you who better take a look

in the mirror, Mr MC Gusto.

You are not the sensitive man

you used to be.

# I'm in love...

Daliha!

Give it to me! Albert!

That girl is too wholesome.

She's messin' with our program.

Sissy, I want you to get in as many

pictures as possible with MC Gusto,

kissin' him, huggin' him, whatever.

- I planned on doin' that anyway.

- No, no, baby,

I mean, with a

professional photographer.

You should be what

Cell Block 4's all about.

If I could just add

a personal note at this point.

This was the year

when I first discovered CB4.

Well, you three have been

inside my head ever since.

- That's my personal thank you.

- You're very welcome.

I only wish everyone

felt that way.

The home is the most important

institution in American life.

It's our castle in a world

of demons and dragons.

Since the mysterious

death of my wife,

my son Ben and I had

bonded together in our home.

I say "had"

because through rap music,

evil influences invaded our castle,

representatives of a demon culture

that must be stopped at all costs!

Any person who'd

defile America's pastime

by wearing a baseball cap backwards,

well, that's an evil

that speaks for itself.

See! See how those demons

have poisoned my seed!

Ben! Ben!

Ben!

Ben! Come here, son!

To some people, these fools

out here could be a problem.

Bad for the image,

bad for sales.

But you, brothers,

have created something so nasty,

so vile, that the iller you get,

the better off we are.

- Now go out there and have a good time.

- No problem.

By the way,

I almost forgot to tell you.

Gusto escaped from prison.

He has vowed to dismember

everybody in the group.

Knock 'em dead.

Get back! Get back!

Trustus? Trustus, hi.

- Hi, Eve. I love the piece you did.

- You should thank Dead Mike.

You aware they might be

arrested for indecency tonight?

Cell Block 4 is not afraid to go

to jail. Cell Block 4 is from jail!

It would be like sendin' 'em home!

Sissy? Baby, where are ya?

There you are.

Can I have your autograph?

Yeah, yeah, little kiddie.

Stab Master, CB4.

- Keep it as a souvenir.

- Thanks.

- Let's go, baby.

- Come on, Dad. It's only an...

Hey, hey, wait. Who is this?

- She looks too cute to be your woman.

- Remember what time it is!

- She's my cousin, my cousin.

- What?

Are you OK?

Man, look at this funky a**hole.

That b*tch wouldn't give me the time

of day because I wasn't an entertainer,

because I wasn't a star.

Don't the b*tch know that

we're the motherfuckin' stars?

That's all right.

Because now I'm gonna get

paid off from them. You know how?

Pimp 'em like

the b*tches that they are.

Pimp them motherfuckin' hos.

With Daliha out of the picture,

I decided to see what Sissy

was all about.

The only problem was, so did Dead Mike.

Come to big daddy.

I ain't goin' down there.

Sh*t.

CB4, where you at?

CB4, where you at?

Yo, we livin' crazy large.

We got the girls,

we got the money, we got the gold.

And we're one spot behind Wackee Dee.

Takin' out all that rap.

- I'm glad you happy, cos I'm not.

- Man, what's your beef?

All this gangster mess, man.

People protestin'. That ain't for me.

I like the music.

I like the fly-ass girlies.

I also like when I help

my sisters around the house.

One nigga wants to be Malcolm X,

the other wants to be Richie Cunningham.

Yo, the devil's in full effect.

Hey, there's nothin'

to worry about. Trust me.

In my role as head of the Sacramento

City Council's Board of Decency,

I, Virgil Robinson,

am here to inform you that:

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