Charlie And The Chocolate Factory Page #6

There it isn't.

Daddy, I want them to stop.

(GROANS)

What are they doing?

They're testing to see

if she's a bad nut.

(CHITTERS)

Oh, my goodness.

She is a bad nut after all.

(GASPING)

MR. SALT:
Veruca!

VERUCA:
Daddy!

Where are they taking her?

Where all the other

bad nuts go.

To the garbage chute.

(VERUCA SCREAMING)

Where does the chute go?

To the incinerator.

But don't worry.

We only light it on Tuesdays.

Today is Tuesday.

There's always

the chance...

they decided not

to light it today.

(VERUCA SCREAMING)

(NAILS CRACKING)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

(EXCLAIMS)

(SCREAMING CONTINUES)

Now, she may be stuck in...

the chute just

below the top.

If that's the case,

all you have to

do is just reach...

in and pull her out.

WONKA:
Okay?

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

(OOMPA-LOOMPAS SINGING)

ALL:

♪ Veruca Salt, the little brute. ♪

♪ Has just gone down the garbage chute. ♪

♪ And she will meet, as she descends. ♪

♪ A rather different set of friends. ♪

OOMPA-LOOMPA:

♪ A fish head, for example, cut. ♪

ALL:

♪ This morning from a halibut. ♪

♪ An oyster from an oyster stew. ♪

♪ A steak that no one else would chew. ♪

♪ And lots of other things as well. ♪

♪ Each with its rather horrid smell. ♪

♪ Horrid smell. ♪

♪ These are Veruca's newfound friends. ♪

♪ That she will meet as she descends. ♪

♪ These are Veruca's newfound friends. ♪

♪ Who went and spoiled her, who indeed? ♪

♪ Who pandered to her every need? ♪

OOMPA-LOOMPA 2:

♪ Who turned her into such a brat? ♪

OOMPA-LOOMPA 3:

♪ Who are the culprits? ♪

OOMPA-LOOMPA 4:

♪ Who did that? ♪

ALL:

♪ The guilty ones, now this is sad. ♪

♪ Are dear old Mum and loving Dad. ♪

(EXCLAIMS)

(MR. SALT YELLING)

(YELLING CONTINUES)

Oh, really?

Oh, good.

I've just been informed...

that the incinerator's

broken.

So there should be

about three weeks...

of rotten garbage to

break their fall.

Well, that's good news.

Yeah.

Well...

let's keep on trucking.

(DINGS)

WONKA:
I don't know why

I didn't think of this earlier.

The elevator's

by far the most...

efficient way to get

around the factory.

There can't be

this many floors.

How do you know, Mr. Smarty-Pants?

This isn't an ordinary...

up-and-down elevator,

by the way.

This elevator can go...

sideways, longways,

slantways...

and any other ways

you can think of.

You just press

any button...

and, whoosh! You're off.

(LAUGHS, GRUNTS)

Oh, look. Look.

Ladies and gentlemen...

welcome to Fudge Mountain.

(THRILLING MUSIC PLAYING)

Oh!

I'd rather not talk about this one.

(SHEEP BLEATING)

And this is the

Puppet Hospital...

and Burn Center.

It's relatively new.

(CHUCKLES)

WONKA:
Ah, the

administration offices.

Hello, Doris.

(ALL GASPING)

(FIREWORKS CRACKLING)

(GUN FIRING)

(BANGING LOUDLY)

(FIRING CONTINUES)

(MISSILE FIRING)

(CRUMPLING EXPLOSIONS)

Why is everything here...

completely pointless?

Candy doesn't have

to have a point.

That's why it's candy.

MIKE:
It's stupid!

(IN MR. WONKA'S VOICE)

Candy is a waste of time.

No son of mine is...

going to be a chocolatier.

Then I'll run away.

To Switzerland.

Bavaria.

The candy capitals of the world.

Go ahead.

But I won't be here

when you come back.

(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING)

Sorry, son.

We're closing for the night.

(THUNDER CRACKLING)

(CRUMPLING EXPLOSIONS)

I wanna pick a room.

Go ahead.

(DINGS)

Here.

Put these on quick,

and don't take them

off whatever you do.

This light could burn your...

eyeballs right out

of your skulls.

And we certainly

don't want that,

now, do we?

This is the testing room.

For my very latest and

greatest invention:

Television Chocolate.

One day it occurred to me:

Hey!

If television can break

up a photograph...

into millions and

millions of tiny pieces

and send it whizzing

through the air...

then reassemble it

on the other end...

why can't I do the same

with chocolate?

WONKA:
Why can't I...

send a real bar

of chocolate...

through the television,

all ready to be eaten?

I'm not gonna touch it.

I'm not going in

that direction.

MR. TEAVEE:
Sounds impossible.

MIKE:
It is impossible.

You don't understand...

anything about science.

First off, there's

a difference

between waves

and particles.

Duh!

Second, the amount

of power it...

would take to convert

energy in matter...

would be like nine atomic bombs.

Mumbler!

WONKA:
Seriously.

I cannot understand a...

single word you're saying.

Okey-dokey.

I shall now send a

bar of chocolate

from one end of the room...

to the other...

by television.

Bring in the chocolate!

(FANFARE MUSIC PLAYING)

It's gotta be real big...

because you know

how on TV...

you can film a

regular-size man,

and he comes out

looking this tall?

Same basic principle.

(THUDS)

It's gone.

Told you.

That chocolate

is now rushing...

through the air

above our heads...

in a million

tiny little pieces.

Come over here.

Come on. Come on.

Come on!

Watch the screen.

Here it comes.

Oh, look.

(MONKEYS SCREECHING)

Take it.

It's just a picture

on a screen.

Scaredy-cat.

You take it.

Go on.

Just reach out and grab it.

(SOFTLY) Go on.

Holy buckets.

Eat it. Go on.

It'll be delicious.

It's the same bar.

It's just gotten a little

smaller on the journey.

That's all.

(TEETH CHATTERING)

It's great.

It's a miracle.

So imagine...

you're sitting at home

watching television...

and suddenly a

commercial will flash...

onto the screen, and

a voice will say:

"Wonka's chocolates...

are the best in the world."

"If you don't believe us,

try one for yourself."

And you simply reach out...

and take it.

How about that?

So can you send

other things?

Say, like, breakfast cereal?

Do you have any idea what

breakfast cereal's made of?

It's those little curly

wooden shavings...

you find in pencil

sharpeners.

But could you send

it by Televison...

if you wanted to?

Of course I could.

What about people?

Well, why would I

wanna send a person?

They don't taste

very good at all.

Don't you realize

what you've invented?

It's a teleporter!

MIKE:
It's the most important

invention...

in the history of the world.

And all you think

about is chocolate.

Calm down, Mike.

I think Mr. Wonka knows...

what he's talking about.

No, he doesn't.

He has no idea.

You think he's a genius...

but he's an idiot.

But I'm not.

(OOMPA LOOPA GROANS)

Hey, little boy.

Don't push my button.

(CLICKS)

(THUDDING)

He's gone.

Let's go check the

television, see what we get.

I sure hope no

part of him...

gets left behind.

What do you mean?

Well, sometimes

only half of the...

little pieces find

their way through.

If you had to choose only

one half of your son,

which one would it be?

What kind of a question is that?

No need to snap.

Just a question.

Try every channel.

I'm starting to feel

a little anxious.

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

There he is.

Mike.

OOMPA-LOOMPAS (SINGING):

♪ The most important thing. ♪

♪ That we've ever learned. ♪

♪ The most important thing we've learned ♪

♪ As far as children are concerned ♪

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