Chokeslam Page #7

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It was you that day, wasn't it?

Ah!

Tell me the truth!

- Gah!

- Tell me!

God!

Uh!

Hey.

Hey.

Hi.

What happened to you last night?

Yeah, sorry.

Yeah, I should've said goodbye.

I actually had this really

weird nightmare, burning hot

bacon fat all over my face.

- What?

- Got all deformed. Stupid.

I had a good time last night.

Have you seen Luke?

I've been calling him,

and we have stuff to do,

and he's nowhere to be seen.

Have you seen him?

No.

What?

Nothing.

Jesus.

Did you get that from wrestling?

No, I didn't.

Why are you being weird?

Then what is it from?

He confessed, Corey.

He's the one that shouted

at you from the bikes.

What?

I'm sorry, did you...

Did you beat it out

of him or something?

He's not your real

friend, Corey.

He's only helping you

because he feels guilty.

That sounds familiar.

What-okay, wait,

wait, wait, wait, wait.

Why are you mad at me? He's-

who do you think are

you are, coming back here and

meddling in my life?

He's my friend, okay?

Look.

I know about the

psychiatric hospital, okay?

What, did Evelyn tell you that?

No, your mom.

You went to my mother?

She came to me, okay?

She was worried about you.

Oh, you're unbeliev-

you're unreal!

I didn't know, Corey.

If I knew, I would've come back.

I didn't need you

to come back, okay?

I don't need you to

come save me, all right?

It was a stress clinic, okay?

And my mom checked me in there,

and I stayed to appease her

because she's crazy, and you

know that, and I was there for a

total of 48 friggin hours.

Well, your 'friend' is

the reason you fell.

Why do you think I was up

there to begin with, hm?

You said in the hospital

that it wasn't because of me.

Yeah, look, I know what I said.

Okay?

I don't know if I was up there

and I was going to jump.

I don't even know.

I don't know what

I was thinking. All right?

Except for some really dark

sh*t because I was 18 years old

and you broke my heart.

Cool. Yeah, okay.

Well, I have the

biggest match of my life,

so I don't know how I'm

supposed to do that if-

get over yourself. Just get over

yourself, all right?

You were never worth killing

myself over and you definitely

weren't worth all of this.

I'm done. I'm not

thinking about her anymore.

I'm not thinking or talking

about her every again.

Not one more moment after this

moment right now where I'm

talking and thinking about her.

That's it.

That's the last one.

Hey.

Hey.

You've still got me

and if you want to

start seeing me

regularly, again,

we can arrange that.

Okay, so, I explained

everything.

Are you sure you're okay here?

Absolutely, yeah.

Okay.

All right.

Yeah, so, you know, just don't

unplug this cooler at all.

Ever. Day and night

leave it running and

don't eat the jelly salt,

that stuff is disgusting.

If I put my hand right here.

No! No! No!

Don't! Don't! Don't!

I'm just kidding. I'm kidding,

Corey. Kidding. Kidding.

Ha-ha-ha. That's the no-hands

zone. Okay. All right.

You be careful. She's a tricky

devil, don't lose a limb.

Good luck.

Plan b, you're fighting Horatio.

Okay, what about the

guy in Cleveland.

He made me shave his back.

Never mind.

Why are you so tense?

Just, it looks like a sellout.

Yeah, well, I had to show

watanabee you're a global draw.

Just do what you do best

and we're set for life.

Look, I know that Japan

is important to you...

This is everything

you've ever wanted.

I went out and I got it for you.

Is this because of him?

Because if it is,

I don't know whether I

should be angry or laugh.

Yeah, wait, uh, yeah.

Hey, jan?

Is this the right baguette?

Malcolm, now you know you can't

come barging in here like this.

I'm sorry.

Thank you for bringing the

groceries, like I asked,

very nice of you.

On your way now.

Ah, well, you're

welcome, Ms. Swanson.

Mm-hmm.

See you, Corey.

See you.

Bye-bye now.

Bye.

How about that? Just

negotiated you a signing bonus.

Right there. Two minutes.

What do you think Swanson

was up to in that time?

Look, I appreciate

all your help.

I do, and I want this Japan deal

also, but could you just like

give me some space?

Just have a lot on my mind.

Well, excuse me for trying

to better our lives.

Let's just talk after

the match, okay?

Let's be clear,

I got you this opportunity

and I can take it away.

Oh, really?

What? You think I

don't deserve my due,

after all the sh*t

I put up with handling you?

Holding your hand in rehab.

Getting you on a reality show.

Building up your wrestling

credentials only to have you

start having feelings

again for some pathetic little

waste of skin.

I appreciate all that

you've done for my career.

Thank you.

Your career?

Mm-hmm.

What about us?

It's like that is it?

Fine.

Hey.

Hey.

You know how I've

been trying to...

I feel like sh*t, man,

and I just wanted you to

win one. You know? Just once.

You know, get the girl.

I should've apologised

for the billboard.

Everything.

I'm sorry, bud.

Okay?

Cool.

So you're not going

to the big match?

No.

I saw through the

window you were eating.

You know?

What are you eating?

Hot chocolate for my boys.

All right.

This is ridiculous, Janet.

We can't do this anymore.

- Mr. Kirby, really, you can't-

- no, no, Janet. Please. Enough.

Why the hell aren't

you at that match?

- Malcolm, this isn't-

- now I know this isn't my place.

I know you're not my wife.

He's not my son.

I'm just the friendly

neighbour, right?

Yeah, well, I'm the friendly

neighbour who has been nailing

your mother for

the last 11 years.

Classic.

Hey, Malcolm.

I knew that.

You did?

Yeah.

Why do you think I keep asking

for earplugs for Christmas?

Oh, my word.

Okay, good.

And her opponent

from the netherworld,

weighing 300 pounds, 'merciless'

mordecai.

You can't sit here eating cereal

and expect to be with that girl.

I don't expect to

be with the girl.

The girl is never

going to be with me.

Okay? I tried,

so why bother anymore?

Okay.

Okay, let me get this straight,

she's gone, forever,

and you're back

working at the deli-

forever.

Are you good with that?

He's right.

That creepy old man, who's

nailing your mom, he's right.

You're wrong.

Yeah! Woo!

Now's the time!

Things going

bad to worse for smasheena.

Come on, guys.

She's getting her ass kicked.

Corey, you've got

to do something.

Mordecai living up to his name,

showing smasheena no mercy.

Locks in the "crab,"

this could be it.

Oh.

Oh, this smells like ass.

Oh, this is disgusting.

Oh.

Hey, buddy. Playing a

little bit of dress up?

Oh, god.

Oh, you're a bastard.

You put mordecai in

the ring with her, man.

Don't think I don't know you're

trying to screw sheena over.

What is wrong with you?

Someone's got to feed the

beast and she's made a poor,

poor career decision.

Yeah. No, totally. You know,

but she's sheena, right,

and she's like really hard

to deal with sometimes.

I was really hoping

things would get physical.

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