Click

What was going on there, huh?

We thought

you were sleeping, Daddy.

How can I sleep with two

Twinkie burglars roaming around?

Can we watch

Dragon Tales, please?

Yeah. Why not, why not?

Which one of these

turns on the TV?

Honey, I think you

just opened the garage.

I'm just planning ahead. I know.

- P-yew! Was that a stinky-dink bug?

- Good job.

Whatever happened

to the good old days...

...when you pulled the knob

and on came the boob tube?

The O'Doyles got

a universal remote control.

One clicker controls everything.

Makes life a lot easier

for old people like you.

Well, whoop-de-do

for the O'Doyles.

- Tree house?

I don't know. Ask your father.

Ask me what?

Do you think you'll have time

to finish building the tree house ever?

Yeah, Dad. It's kind of been

halfway done for two months now.

All right. I want to, it's just I got a lot

of things going on at work right now.

But as soon as I'm done, I'm on it.

I promise. Hang in there.

Hey, look at Sundance

wrestle his duck.

Oh, no, that's not wrestling.

That's something you shouldn't

know about for another 10 to 30 years.

Ten for you. Thirty for you.

Hey, Michael? I'll see you tonight

at the swim meet?

Swim meet.

- I gotta go to that?

- Yes.

- I'm kidding you. I'll be there. Okay?

- All right. I love you, Michael.

Forever and ever, babe.

Mr. Newman.

Kevin O'Doyle.

Yeah. Always a pleasure.

What kind of stereo you got

in that blue piece of sh*t?

You know what?

I never checked, Kevin.

Yeah, well, my father's stereo

is a Bose.

Your father's stereo blows?

That's too bad.

No! I said... That's not what I said!

His father's stereo blows!

Come on! Pay the man, let's go!

- Good morning, Mr. Newman.

- Good morning.

- Good morning, Mr. Newman.

- Hello.

- Good morning, Mr. Newman.

- Hi.

Good morning, Mr. Newman.

- Good morning, Mr. Newman.

- Man, Alice...

...I was stuck in traffic for an hour

and a half. When's the meeting?

- It started already.

- What?

Can I go to the bathroom?

Go to the bathroom.

I told you, you don't have to ask me.

Well, the interesting thing,

Prince Habeeboo...

...is that the building codes

in Manhattan will allow us...

- Michael.

- Sorry I'm late, sir.

Some moron in a red Lamborghini

parked in my spot so...

Prince Habeeboo

drive red Lamborghini.

Red Lamborghini?

I meant blue Ferrari.

Is this one of your partners?

Actually, Michael

is just an associate.

But he is one of our brightest

young architects.

Thank you.

Walk His Majesty

through our design concept.

With pleasure.

- Prince Haboobee...

- Habeeboo!

Prince Habeeboo.

Habeeboo. I thought I said that.

When Mr. Ammer explained to me

the type of man you are...

...a visionary who prides himself

on originality...

...I said to myself, " Let's smash

the mould and redefine elegance."

So I present to you your restaurant.

Where is...? Where's bar?

Bar is... Here's the bar.

Now, the waterfall...

Make bar longer.

Okay. We could cut

into the atrium a little bit.

No atrium. Just make bar longer

for Prince Habeeboo.

Really?

- Still itchy?

- You got it.

And put big drain in floor

for wet T-shirt contest.

Now, you're kidding me, right?

Boob water's gotta

go someplace, Michael.

Let's just take out the atrium and

run with that and there's your drain.

- God.

- I love it. It is simply awesome.

Yeah. Basically you want me to design

you an Arabian hoochie house?

How dare you compare

Prince Habeeboo's Bikini Hut...

...to this hoochie house?

- This idea's...

...got nothing to do

with hoochies, Michael.

It's like opposite of hoochie.

No disrespect,

Prince Hubbida Hubbida.

- Hubba Bubba.

- Habeeboo!

Habeeboo!

Hubba Bubba is chewing gum.

Prince Habeeboo's

not chewing gum.

Prince Habeeboo, we will...

I will make this happen.

John Ammer's office.

I hope that atrium idea didn't take

too long to configure, Michael.

Oh, there'll be other Junes

in my life, sir.

See that parking garage

over there on 56?

Watsuhita wants to knock it down

and build a luxury hotel.

- You got the commission?

- Not yet.

I just need someone to come up

with a design proposal. Intrigued?

Hell, yes.

I'm Fourth of July-ing with the kids.

When I get back, I'm all over it.

Great. Have a great Fourth of July

with the kids. I'll put Swardson on it.

No, no. Absolutely not.

L... l... Can't it just wait three days?

These guys are Japanese.

They can't wait for their fish to cook.

I guess I could talk to my wife.

Great. See you later at happy hour

with Prince Habadabee.

My son has a swim meet tonight

that I have to get to s...

I'm just messing with you.

We're good.

Yeah, Ben!

That's my boy! That's my boy!

Kid, you were great!

You're not my dad.

- As far as you know.

- What?

I was just joking.

Is he really my dad?

Come on, come on! Yes, Ben.

Yes, you did it!

Honey, you were so great.

Whoa, what are you, half a dolphin

or something? That was incredible.

You just got here, Dad. I saw you.

What do you mean I just got here?

Why are you saying that?

I saw you. You jumped in there,

you swam here.

- Then what stroke was he doing, Dad?

- He was doing the shut-up.

Hey. Good thing is,

Daddy was here to see you finish.

He didn't see me finish.

He was hanging out

with Ping Woo for some reason.

- Yeah, what was that about, huh?

- The kid was drowning.

I'm gonna let him drown?

Nobody goes drowning in my pool.

How you doing? Bill Herlihy.

Ben's coach. You must be Dad.

Michael Speedo...

Michael Newman. Sorry.

Big Ben, that was great progress

out there, huh?

Just remember, right arm out,

head turns left. Left arm out...

Head turns right. I know.

I just forgot at the end.

Well, that's all right.

You master that, people are gonna

think you're half a dolphin out there.

- Really?

- Yeah.

Cute.

Hello? Mr. Ammer.

Ben, honey, slow down.

It's not a race.

That's his second one

in five minutes.

Keeps eating more and more.

He's like a machine.

He can't still be hungry.

He's not. He's just doing whatever

Michael's doing. It's driving me crazy.

Everything Michael's been doing lately

is very unhealthy for him.

He's gonna kill himself.

Like a signature building

we're talking about.

Oh, my God.

Scared the crap out of me.

Dad, how much longer

are you gonna live?

- One minute.

- One minute?

- Daddy's gonna die in one minute!

- Oh, no, honey.

Don't worry. I'm not dying.

I'm gonna live for 200 years.

Is that long enough for you and me?

- Promise?

- I promise. Swear. Come here.

You son of a b*tch!

Hey! There are families here!

Show some respect,

you pieces of sh*t!

Go home and watch VH1, old man.

Don't light another damn one!

Benjamin. Benjamin.

What am I holding?

A quarter. Now, Grandma

does not let me eat ice cream...

...because of my diabetes.

- True.

But she says nothing, however,

about a tasty quarter.

Okay.

All right. All right.

Very quickly, please, count to three

because it tastes terrible.

One, two, three.

Rate this script:3.8 / 4 votes