Cobain: Montage of Heck Page #5

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I mean once in a while,

it might be his family who was trying to kill him,

but that was just really rare.

Usually it was someone else coming

after him that he didn't know.

I asked... I thought he should

try to talk to someone,

but without much money,

that really wasn't going to happen.

Kurt would get

stomachaches a lot

and say his stomach hurt.

You know, he'd be feeling fine,

and then he'd get out of the car

and just be like,

"I gotta throw up."

I know he went to the doctor

once or twice,

but it didn't really work.

Most of the time,

it's sitting right in my stomach.

Like where my stomach pain is.

Every time I've had

an endoscope,

they'd find a red irritation.

I would sing

and cough up blood.

It's like this is no way

to live a life.

I love to play music,

but something's not right.

So I decided

to medicate myself.

How much of that

pain would you say

actually fuels what you're

writing and playing?

See, that's a scary question,

because I think it probably helps,

you know?

But I would give up everything

to have good health.

But then again,

I'm always afraid

that if I lost

the stomach problem,

I might not be as creative.

There's a journal

entry where Kurt mentions

doing heroin for the first time in

1987 when he was living with you.

See, he never told me that.

He totally

had kept that from me,

because I totally would have

talked him out of it.

In fact, he used to make fun

of some of the people

in Seattle that were using that

and say it was really stupid.

Because I've been told before that

he was doing it when we were dating,

but I'm like,

"He didn't do it around me, ever."

I never found anything, so...

I can't really say

exactly why we broke up.

I just know

that we were fighting more

and he was staying away

from the house more.

I think he just pretty much

didn't love me

as much as he used to

or felt...

He just felt like maybe

he was moving ahead

and I wasn't.

Kurt Cobain's here.

You know,

Kurt Cobain from Aberdeen?

- What's going on, baby?

- Not a damn thing.

You called up and said,

"I want to play some songs."

- So I said, "Rockin' good news."

- This is the truth.

"Bloody brilliant."

Um, I just wrote most of

the lyrics this evening.

In the car on the way up here?

While I was driving

with one foot.

Uh-huh.

Um, yeah, that's what I did,

and I just thought I would

just come here, say hi.

Well, let her rip.

Okay,

is there any major label interest

in you at the present?

Can you say?

Anybody not

affiliated with CBS.

Would you consider changing?

We're considering AMA

because we want to get

as much as we can.

But you're sort of

this interesting mix of...

As you say,

you're one of the laziest people you know,

but you're also ambitious

for a lazy person.

You think so?

How does it feel to

be surrounded by so many people

that are telling you that you'll

soon be doing very well?

I think it's embarrassing

to have so many expectations

and a totally superficial label

to put on a band

to state that

they're the next big thing,

because, you know,

that's not our goal in the first place.

People are putting

that tag on us

without us really wanting to do that,

you know?

You're not prepared for that?

Not prepared? Nope.

Because we're not going to be.

We're prepared to destroy

our careers if it happens.

I'm so happy

'Cause today

I found my friends

They're in my head

I'm so ugly

That's okay,

'cause so are you

We broke our mirrors

Sunday morning is every day

For all I care

and I'm not scared

Light my candles in a daze

'Cause I found God

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah

Yeah

I'm so lonely

That's okay,

I shaved my head

And I'm not sad

And just maybe I'm to blame

For all I've heard,

but I'm not sure

I'm so excited...

I am Kurt.

I play guitar and I sing.

And I am Dave,

and I play drums,

and I sing sometimes,

but not that often.

I'm Krist, and I play bass

and I don't sing, thank God.

Yeah, yeah

Yeah...

All right,

Nirvana's joined us in the studio tonight.

A new music hour.

We got Krist Novoselic,

got Kurt Cobain and Dave Grohl.

Their upcoming release

"Nevermind"

comes out the 24th

of this month.

And you guys will be doing

an in-store

by the Beehive Music & Video

on University District.

So go out and meet the band.

That's at 7:
00 to 9:00.

I like it,

I'm not gonna crack

I miss you,

I'm not gonna crack

I love you,

I'm not gonna crack

I killed you,

I'm not gonna crack

I like it,

I'm not gonna crack

I'll miss you,

I'm not gonna crack

I love you,

I'm not gonna crack

I killed you,

I'm not gonna crack.

End of July or August,

he's home.

And he comes downstairs and he's

in his little whitey-tighties,

no shirt, barefoot,

no pants other than his undies,

and, uh...

Very Don Cobain.

That's another thing

I got sick of looking at.

And he's standing there

with this tape in his hand.

I go, "What's that?"

And he goes,

"It's the master cut to my new album.

Can I put it

on the stereo?"

And I go,

"Yeah. And turn it up! Up, up, up!"

'Cause I listen

to music really loud.

And I look at him and I go,

"Oh, my God."

"Oh, my God."

And I almost started crying.

I mean, not from happiness,

from fear.

It was fear.

And I just went,

"This is going

to change everything."

And I said,

"You better buckle up,

'cause you are

not ready for this."

For someone like yourself,

when you're sort of...

Say your dreams come true,

all the worst aspects of them

come true as well.

It's like,

be careful what you wish for.

You're gonna get it.

Yeah.

How are you sort of

dealing with the pull-apart?

You know,

being pulled apart by stuff like that?

I don't know if I expressed

that the right way.

Well, um...

Load up on guns

Bring your friends

It's fun to lose

into pretend

She's overboard

And self-assured

Oh, no, I know

A dirty word

Hello, hello

Hello, hello

Hello, hello

Hello, hello

With the lights out

It's less dangerous

Here we are now

Entertain us

I feel stupid

And contagious

Here we are now

Entertain us

A mulatto

An albino

A mosquito

My libido

A denial

A denial

A denial

A denial

A denial.

Cool, and cut!

- Cut.

- Let's wrap!

Hey, man!

If this bird goes down,

this is the safest place to be...

Right in the tail

where the bathroom is.

As soon you

walked on this plane,

I took one gander at you

and I saw nothing but trouble.

- Hah. Bah!

- Peh!

See if you can try and do it.

Me and my sidekick,

"Treefrog Johnson" here,

is gonna rip you

a new butthole.

And is this time our time?

What a sensitive man.

'Cause it says it's almost

like 3:
00 in the morning.

Time flies

when you're having fun.

I don't care, I don't care,

I don't care, I don't care

Care, care if it's old

I don't mind, I don't mind,

I don't mind, I don't mind

Mind, don't have a mind

Get away, get away,

get away, get away

Way, way from your home

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