Computer Chess Page #8

And I hope you'll use discretion

with this information.

You know that my own work

is primarily experimental psychology -

broader applications or implications

of the same artificial intelligence work

that we're doing?

Yes.

Not necessarily having told Tom

I was doing this,

I used some of the TSAR software

in a personal project.

I was up very late one night -

in the lab running experiments -

I saw something anomalous...

something that I told myself for a long time

didn't happen,

that it was some kind of a practical joke,

or RF interference -

something deeper and stranger,

possibly more exciting!

I saw something that night

that I can only describe as chilling.

(Whirring)

(Ultrasound heartbeat)

I just thought you should know.

Thank you.

(Breathes heavily)

(Knocking)

(Door creaking)

- Hi.

- Hi.

Um... hi.

Peter, your strange ideas from last night -

they really got to me.

This morning I woke up

and everything was weird.

I walked out into the lobby

of the conference

and I looked down and everybody

looked like they were chess pieces.

I saw Professor Schoesser standing there -

he was the king,

and Henderson was zig-zagging,

going diagonals like a bishop.

And there was a student

who was stepping forward,

just like a pawn.

And just as he was about

to hit Professor Schoesser,

his wife swooped in to defend him,

just like a queen.

And I kept thinking

that a knight was gonna teleport...

Did you see any teleportation?

No.

No...

Um... did you see anything where...

like if two bodies would come together,

one of them would disappear?

No.

OK.

All right.

Well, thanks.

Er... good night.

Good night.

(Keneiloe) Hello, sir.

We are a group of hearts and minds.

Oh, I see...

That's very nice,

but listen -

you're gonna have to get out of here,

take your group,

because I have this room reserved

for a chess tournament.

There's a chess tournament in 20 minutes

and I'm bringing in chessboards,

I'm bringing in a computer,

there are 20 people coming.

So just take your group

and you'll have to leave.

Er... no, sir.

We cannot leave.

I have the room reserved.

You don't have it reserved.

I have it for the whole weekend!

Every day I have it with the management.

We've had a chess tournament

all weekend,

- people from all around...

- But today is Monday, sir.

- I know. Well, Monday is part of the...

- (Bell rings)

Yes.

Um, perhaps

we can speak with the manager?

No, no, let's not talk to the manager.

(Drumming)

Um... excuse me, people.

We have an agreement.

Shh.

(Printer clatters)

(Distant drumming)

(Printer clatters)

(Glass shatters in distance)

(Group vocalising in distance)

(Clock ticking)

Don't you people have any respect?

(Ticking stops)

(I COLLIE RYAN:
"it's Gonna Rain")

(Breathing heavily)

J It's gonna rain down by me... J

Pat, Pat... it's OK.

Pat, forget about them.

Forget about them.

J It's gonna rain down by you

JAnd the rain comes down easy

J' But the minds of men take longer J'

(Babble of successive voices...)

- ...breaking down walls.

- I didn't see two of us, I saw one of us.

Seriously, I don't think

lever saw him the way I saw him just now.

A much deeper connection...

There was a warm communion

that came through...

I wanted to, just, take her clothes off

in that moment.

Excellent.

Did you hear what he said?

He wanted to take off her clothes...

Well, I have to think

it was my mom and dad.

I have to think it was Biblical...

- What even does the love taste like?

- Dangerous and potentially catastrophic.

I think all of us can see mates

right down the line.

No, I don't do anything like that.

- Wow. OK.

- I love doing this.

I have a million more things to say.

(Laughter, shouting)

J' But the minds of men take longer J'

Dr Schoesser, I'm very, very sorry.

Mr Schoesser...

Professor Beuscher,

I'm very, very sorry.

J It's gonna rain

J It's gonna rain down by you

J It's gonna rain

J It's gonna rain down by me

JAnd the rain comes down easy

J' But the minds of men

JThe minds of men take longer

J' Sitting easy

JSitting easy by my love

JWith the warm breathing sun above

JAnd the rising wind off the land below

JTells the sky of a rainy child that grows

JThere's an eagle hanging lazy in the sky

J' Dropping feathers down by where we lie

JAnd the feathers will soon die

JGiving way to a rainy child of sky

J It's gonna rain,

it's gonna rain down by you

J It's gonna rain

J It's gonna rain down by me J

This song is in honour of artificial intelligence.

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