Cornered! Page #2

Who's that?

Jimmy, give me the bat.

- Whoa!

- Steve! Steve! Donny!

- Who the hell was that?

- What he look like?

I don't know, man.

I was talking to Jimmy.

He had a hat on.

All right, everybody,

get back inside.

Hey, uh,

you don't think...

Get out of here, Morty.

- Stay. Stay. Please stay.

- I need to make rent, Donny.

Join us for the game tonight.

I don't know the first thing

about poker.

Oh, Texas Hold 'Em is easy, Jess.

You'll learn it in no time.

Besides, Steve

will be wasted soon.

It'll be like taking candy from a baby.

So, who's playing poker?

Well, Jess is thinking

about joining us tonight.

Well, as long as she's

got money for the pot.

- Steve, don't be such a pig.

- I'll spot you 50 bucks.

Maybe you'll get lucky.

- Okay.

- Okay, everyone,

collect your purchases.

Form an orderly line.

Jimmy, you're on the register

while I set up upstairs.

Oh, and Mona owes 9.25

and Jess 12.20.

Hey, who says

I owe nine bucks?

Well, let's see.

One Mississippi Mud Sandwich,

two fudge bars.

Oh, and those chocolate clairs

you snuck in your bag last Wednesday.

Hey.

How does he know

about last Wednesday?

I told you. He's got VCRs

wired up to those things.

Well, they're damn well hidden if he has.

Believe me, I have checked.

He doesn't trust any of us.

He's just an a**hole.

Give me the usual.

I got him wrapped around my finger.

- I know all of Steve's tricks.

- Oh, yeah?

Very funny, Jimmy.

Huh? Oh.

Sorry.

You even have

the same doughnuts every night.

You okay?

I'm all right!

Donny, can you take over for me?

- I got to take a leak, man.

- Sure.

T.J.

Yeah. It's me. Jimmy.

No. Look, I can't get

into all that now.

When can you come by?

I'll pay for the damn cab.

I'm dying here, man.

Well, how soon is soon?

One hour? Two hours?

Okay.

Okay.

Look, I said okay, didn't I?

- Steve. Hey...

- Hey, Jimmy...

What the f*** did I tell you?

That if I ever caught you calling

his scumbag again, I'd f*** you up!

No. Wait. I just needed a little

something to take the edge off...

- just a little methadone.

- Methadone?

Goddamn it, you were on that sh*t

in rehab and you still f***ed it up...

- by bringing in dope!

- Ow!

- Goddamn it!

- Ow! Leave me alone, Steve.

The deal with your mother was that if you

goddamn work here you got to be clean!

- I was clean!

- When?

- Yesterday!

- Should we do something?

Who's gonna stop him? You?

What the hell is it

all about anyway?

Where do you think Jimmy's been

this past week?

Hawaii.

Comes back whiter

than a nun's tit,

- and you think he's been to Hawaii?

- That's what Steve told me.

Steve put out

the whole Hawaii story...

because he's embarrassed

there's a junkie in his family.

Jimmy was in rehab.

Yeah, and it looks like he got himself

kicked out by the sound of it.

You are worthless, goddamn it!

Hey, let's just go on upstairs.

Come on.

Someone should talk

to the goddamn mirror for once!

- Steve, I'm feeling sick, man.

- Sick.

Come on, you got

to understand. Steve.

- What the f*** do you think you're doing?

- I got a dependency, man.

- Shut the f*** up.

- Come on. Please, Steve. I need my phone.

- Oh, you want this? Yeah? You want this?

- Yes. Yes, please.

What the hell

did you do that for?

I'm off the clock, Steve.

Let me out.

We're playing poker.

I don't wanna play poker, Steve.

I just wanna go home.

I don't think so. We're gonna have us

a good old-fashioned lock-in.

What? You're gonna keep me

prisoner here?

Don't think of it that way.

We're gonna have some fun,

play some cards, have a couple of drinks.

You could even win

some cash.

Then after a fine evening of

entertainment, you can stay here...

- with your old Uncle Steve.

- No!

You'll be ready for work in the morning.

You'll already be here.

And we'll do this every night until you

feel better, how does that sound?

Get your ass upstairs.

What are you looking for,

his porno collection?

No. I was

just checking.

I think Jimmy was right

about those VCRs.

They're coming.

For once, I actually feel glad

Steve's got all this surveillance stuff.

- What?

- All these cameras.

I mean, they've got to be

some sort of deterrent, right?

I guess.

Hey, hey.

- It looks like my lucky night.

- Ah. Who's the dealer?

- What?

- Whose turn is it to deal?

- Toss those babies over here.

- Uh-uh. We'll cut for it.

Oh!

All right, let's see

the color of your money.

Color of my money is green.

Give me 50.

This is for me and Jess.

- OK, and I'm gonna call tonight, alright?

- Don't worry about it.

Tuesday's my slow night.

Got it. You okay, Jimmy?

He's all right.

He just picked today

to quit the smokes.

Jimmy's quitting smoking?

Yeah. He was being

a real p*ssy about it.

Like you'd know.

God, I've quit smoking

a hundred times.

- Exactly.

- Exactly.

Hey, Steve, what are you gonna do

once you sell this dump?

- I got a plan.

- Oh, yeah?

Why don't you enlighten us?

Well, a couple of my ideas

I would have to run by a patent office...

before I start shooting off

my mouth.

Wait. You're gonna become an inventor?

What are you gonna invent, Steve?

We're closed!

Is anyone

expecting company?

Wait. Didn't Sadie say

that she'd drop by?

Oh, yeah. Sh*t.

I thought we were playing cards,

- or what?

- She owes me money.

- Is it her?

- I can't see from here.

Let me borrow your cell phone

for a second, Jess.

F***! I must've left it in Teddy's car.

- What's wrong with yours?

- I'm outta credit.

Incoming calls only.

You know, I don't think

it really is her. I think it...

- Are we playing cards or what?

- Okay. Okay! My goodness.

Come on. So tell us

what you're going to invent, Steve.

Burger joints.

Hey.

I hate to piss

on your Cheerios, Steve,

but I think Ronald McDonald

may have beat you to the punch.

Okay.

What's the most f***ing

annoying thing in the world?

I'll tell you.

You're out shopping, right?

And you got to take a leak. And the only

place around is a McDonald's.

So you go inside

and some clown says,

"Sorry, man. The restroom's

for customers only".

And you go, "Well, I'm a customer.

I eat here all the time.

I mean, not just now,

but you know".

And the guy goes,

"Yeah, well, that's what everybody says".

And you go, "Look, a**hole.

You see this lump of sh*t? See this?

"I didn't grow this baby grazing

at the f***ing salad bar at Vegans R Us.

Let me use the goddamn john".

The guy goes, "You know what?

Take a hike, or I'm gonna call security".

What do you do?

You either punch the guy out

or piss your pants, right?

You show him your

burger facility reward card.

One Big Mac or its equivalent...

say, a Filet-O-Fish and fries...

equals one stamp on your card

equals one complimentary piss.

Supersize it and you get one free

complimentary sh*t as well.

Yeah, laugh it up, a**hole.

But where are you gonna be this time

next year, apart from the f***ing morgue?

Whatever, man. I got plans.

Yeah? Like what?

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