Coyote Ugly Page #5

So the rest of your family|doesn't live in New York?

Do you always ask|this many questions?

Do you always dodge|this many questions?

You can at least tell me|where you got all the moves you pulled on the bar tonight.

Well, if I told you,|I'd have to kill you.

- That's original.|- Oh.

The sun's coming up.|We're gonna be late.

Late? Late for what?

This is incredible.

- Look at that fish!|- Allright. Put this on. You're gonna need it.

Why? What are you|talking about?

You're gonna help me|unload the next bin.

- You're joking, right?|- No. It's not that bad, Vi.

- I do it all the time.|- Exactly how many jobs do you have?

Tuesday through Saturday,|I'm at the club.

Sunday and Monday|I park cars at the plaza.

I've been a telemarketer.|Would you like to switch to AT&T?

And for six terrifying hours|I delivered phonebooks in Queens.

Don't forget your|extensive work in fish.

This is an expensive city,|and these guys pay cash.

I don't care if they pay in lobster.|I'm not sticking my hands in that fishy bin.

I was gonna split the money|with you.

- A hundred bucks a piece.|- A hundred bucks?

- Wait, wait. Why didn't you say so?|- Thanks, Dan.

- You're not ready, are you? Fifty bucks.|- Wait. No.

- Twenty-five, ten. Ready?|- Okay. Uh-huh.

Ooh! That's disgusting.

Hey, you'll hurt their feelings. Okay.|Just on top of the other fish.

So, I know I just met you|a few days ago. There's something I have to tell you.

You smell really bad.

Well, so do you. I mean,|I was gonna kiss you good-bye, but, um, I thought I might gag.

You're a real charmer.

Okay. Good night.

Good morning.

Don't look at me like that.

Spend it.

- What are you doing here?|- I changed my mind about this kiss.

I think we should give it a shot.

Well, have a nice day.

"Have a nice day"?

Yeah. I panicked.|I didn't know what else to say.

Have a nice day.

All right. Back of the line over here.|Back of the line.

Yeah! Whoa!

Whoa!

- Yeah, I like it!|- Yeah!

- Hey, baby!|- Make a hole. Make a hole!

- Sh*t, the cops are here.|- Nobody else gets in here. Look at this place.

Hey, Lil. I'm sorty.|There's nothing we can do here. You're 50 people over max.

They're trying to shut us down.

Let's go outside and talk.|I'll take care of it.

Hey! Hey!

- This is not a gas pump, son!

Wait your turn!

- Hey, no pictures, man!|- Hey, I'm a reporter from The Voice.

Yeah!

Whoa!

What are you doing? Hey!

- Put me down!|- Hey!

- Put me down!|- Cammie!

- Help!|- Come on! Let her go!

Rachel, help!

Come on! Break it up!

- Lou, where's Rachel and Cammie?|- I don't know!

Let me go!

- Jersey, they're tearing this place apart!

One way or another I'm gonna find ya

I'm gonna get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya|- Let me go!

I'm gonna get ya

get ya, get ya

I'm gonna see ya

meet ya, meet ya, one day

I'm gonna meet ya -

I'll meet ya, I'll meet ya

I will

Drive past your house

are all out

I'll see who's around|- Ooh!

One way or another

I'm gonna find ya

get ya, get ya, one way

Or another I'm gonna win ya

I'll get ya -

I'm gonna see ya

I'm gonna meet ya, meet ya meet ya, meet ya

One day, maybe next week

I'll meet ya - Yeah!

- Great. Yeah.|- Last call, Lil.

- Start clearin' 'em out.|- You got it.

Let's go.

I'm gonna lose ya

I'm gonna give you the slip A slip of the hip

I'm gonna trick ya -

One way or another

I'm gonna trick ya, trick ya trick ya, trick ya

Did you see their faces?|I mean, wow.

They all wanted you, honey.|Even the girls.

Not a dry seat in the house.

- You guys, that was, like,|a one-time performance-- -

- Hmm?|- That I have to repeat, like, every night.

Yahoo!

She sang along with a jukebox.|Let's not start polishing a Grammy.

Oh, come on, Rach.|She saved your butt. Admit it.

No. She saved me|from kicking the sh*t out of a couple of drunks.

- That's it. Ooh.|- Ooh, that was good.

- Where you goin'?|- I don't know.

I gotta walk or celebrate or--

Ugh, pass out or something.

Hey, ladies and gents,

how about a big round|of applause for the singing Coyote from Jersey!

- So I'm a Coyote?|- Five nights a week.

Hey, what is it?|What's wrong?

Why would anything|be wrong?

Um, you called me|in the middle of the night and said there was an emergency.

What was that for?

I had a good night.|I wanted a good-night kiss.

Well, wait a second.|Where are you going?

Have a nice day,|Mr. O'Donnell.

"Have a nice day"?

Right kind of wrong

Right kind of wrong

La-la-di-da-di

is the place to be

La-la-di-da-di

Lovin' you

I should do

I should try to be strong

I should do

my time with you

I should try to be strong

kind of wrong

of wrong

What's going on?|Why do we need my guitar?

You'll find out soon enough.|No. This way.

Okay, now there's a seat.

-Just there.

Uh-huh? Okay?

Take a look.

Your fans wanna hear you sing.

I told you. I-I can't sing my own songs.|I never could.

Well, that's too bad,|because they've requested to hear your songs.

Be gentle on the keyboard.|I borrowed it from the club.

You did all this|just to help me sing?

I thought maybe we could cure|that stage fright I've heard so much about.

Kevin, I wish you could.

Come on, let me try.

Tell me what it feels like.

You really wanna know?

Yeah.

You asked for it.

What are you doing?

The only way I can show you...

is to make you...

really... nervous.

The first thing that happens...

is my heart starts to race.

Good.

Racing heart. Yep.

- Got it.|- And then...

my entire body starts shaking.

Shaking body.|I'm-- I'm getting that. Yeah.

And...

then everything gets... a bit...

cloudy.

Clouds are definitely|rolling in.

Then I start...

losing control.

Well, how long|does this usually last?

Oh, it's been known|to last all night.

- That must be horrible.|- It's excruciating.

I think that audience got more|than they paid for, really.

What's "L.M.S." stand for?

Lynn Marie Sanford.

It was my mom's guitar.

She died five years ago.

She moved to New York to be|a singer when she was my age.

She came pretty close|to the big time.

Well, what happened?

She hated the stage.

She said it was the scariest|place in the world.

Sounds familiar.

You really want me to sing?

Just tell me|what I have to do.

Disappear.

All right. No problem.

I don't like to

Be alone in the night

Hear I'm wrong|when I'm right

And I don't like to

Have the rain on my shoes

But I do love you

But I do love

You

I don't like to

See a sky painted grey

And I don't like when

Nothing's going my way

be the one with the blues but I do

If you wanna write a song.|If you want to be like a serious songwriter,

you simply gotta go|with the Mac.

Laptop. You can lay your tracks down|on a blank CD, and you're done.

Do you--|Do you have a payment plan?

your head upon -

My shoulder when you sleep

- Come on, Cammie!

Oh, I do

And I don't like to

Hear I'm wrong when I'm right

And I don't like to

Have the rain on my shoes

But I do love you

- Hey! -

What are you doing?

What are you,|brain damaged?

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