Crimes and Misdemeanors Page #7

Synopsis: Judah Rosenthal is an ophthalmologist and a pillar of the community who has a big problem: his mistress Dolores Paley has told him that he is to leave his wife and marry her - as he had promised to do - or she will tell everyone of their affair. When he intercepts a letter Dolores has written to his wife Miriam, he is frantic. He confesses all to his shady brother Jack who assures him that he has friends who can take care of her. Meanwhile, filmmaker Cliff Stern is having his own problems. He's been working on a documentary film for some time but has yet to complete it. He and his wife Wendy have long ago stopped loving one another and are clearly on their way to divorce. He falls in love with Halley Reed who works with a producer, Lester. Cliff soon finds himself making a documentary about Lester and hates every minute of it.
Genre: Comedy, Drama
Director(s): Woody Allen
Production: Orion Pictures Corporation
  Nominated for 3 Oscars. Another 16 wins & 21 nominations.
 
IMDB:
8.0
Metacritic:
77
Rotten Tomatoes:
93%
PG-13
Year:
1989
104 min
4,807 Views


Wasn't Lester... so silly?

I mean, the guy is so self-important.

He was pushing all night.

I was frankly embarrassed for him.

What is he doing there?

You're talkin' business at 12 midnight?

Well... Gee, that could be very dangerous.

You want me...

You want me to come over?

OK. If you can handle it.

OK. I'll see you tomorrow.

I'm completely in love with Halley,

and Lester is startin' to make his move.

He wants her just

for a conquest. I can tell.

You know, it's so shallow,

and I'm crazy about her.

How can I compete with the guy?

He's rich and famous and successful.

- Come on. He's no competition for you.

- God bless you for saying that.

But you'll find, as you go through life, that

great depth and smouldering sensuality

does not always win, I'm sorry to say.

Meanwhile, his brother Ben, the rabbi,

he's a wonderful guy.

He called me last night. He's going blind.

He's got a terrible eye disease.

He's gonna be blind in a few months.

And he's got a great attitude.

He's really a mensch.

All right. Look left.

Now straight ahead, Ben.

Now to the right.

That's good.

My mother said that

I should go to the doctor,

because I was... My eyes weren't so good.

Well, you're an ophthalmologist.

Do you agree the eyes

are the windows of the soul?

Well, I believe they're windows,

but I'm not sure it's a soul I see.

My mother taught me I have a soul,

and it'll live on after me when I'm gone,

and if you look deeply enough

in my eyes, you can see it.

So what's the verdict?

Cos I'd like to get this resolved

before my daughter's wedding.

- Julie's getting married?

- Time passes quickly, doesn't it?

Remember she was just a baby?

Well, yours, too.

- Yes.

- Are you OK, Judah?

- Yeah.

- You don't look so good.

I'm fine.

I just haven't been sleeping that well.

Tell me... if I'm not prying... did you ever

resolve your personal difficulties?

Yes, actually.

It resolved itself.

The woman listened to reason.

Did she?

That's wonderful. So you got a break.

Sometimes to have a little good luck

is the most brilliant plan.

Judah, relax. You're white.

You're gonna have a breakdown. It's over.

What do you expect me to be?

My old self?

I jump when the phone rings.

- No good can come of this, Jack.

- Don't be so guilty. I kept you uninvolved.

The guy who's responsible is gone.

He's back in New Orleans.

It's pure evil, Jack.

A man kills for money.

He doesn't even know his victims.

He kills, you pay him

and then he... he kills again.

What was your alternative?

How did I get in so deep? I...

What dream was I following?

Judah, you said it yourself a million

times. You only go around once.

Jack, I went to her place after.

I had to retrieve

some incriminating things.

I saw her there... just staring up.

An inert object.

There was nothing behind her eyes

if you looked into them.

All you saw was a

black void.

Can I help you?

I used to live in this house once.

Really? When?

Many years ago.

My brother and I

used to race through these rooms.

He was a wonderful kid, my brother.

We were very close in those days.

My father had high hopes for him,

but it never seemed to... work out for him.

Would you mind if I just take a minute?

Everything seems to be

flooding through me.

Sure.

Come on, Sol. Get on with it. I'm hungry.

- Do you mind, May?

- It's nonsense anyway.

Why put us through this mumbo jumbo?

Bring on the main course.

I apologise for my disrespectful sister.

This is the twentieth century.

You have young boys sitting here.

- Don't fill their heads with superstition.

- The intellectual. The schoolteacher.

Spare us your Leninist philosophy

just this once.

Afraid if you don't obey the rules

God'll punish you?

- Not me, May. He punishes the wicked.

- Who? Like Hitler?

- We're having a Seder!

- Six million Jews burned to death

- and they got away with it.

- How did they get away with it?

Come on, Sol, open your eyes!

Six million Jews and millions of others.

- And they got off.

- How could humans do such a thing?

Because might makes right.

- Until the Americans marched in...

- I don't like this talk at my Seder.

OK, OK! All right!

I think this is interesting.

You know, there's this joke about

the prizefighter who enters the ring.

And his brother says to the family priest

"Father, pray for him."

The priest said "I will.

But if he can punch, it'll help."

What are you saying, May? You challenge

the whole moral structure of everything?

What moral structure? Is that the kind

of nonsense you use on your pupils?

Do you not find human impulses

basically decent?

- There's basically nothing.

- Such a cynic, my sister. A nihilist.

- Back to Russia!

- Well... Listen.

I happen to agree with May

when it comes to all that mumbo jumbo.

How can you say that? You come

to every Seder. You pray in Hebrew.

Yes. I'm going through the motions.

It's like any ritual. It's a habit.

What are you saying, May? There's

no morality anywhere in the whole world?

For those who want morality,

there's morality.

- Nothing's handed down in stone.

- Sol's kind of faith is a gift.

It's like an ear for music,

or the talent to draw.

He believes. You can use logic

on him and he still believes.

Must everything be logical?

And if a man commits a crime,

if he... if he kills...

- One way or another he will be punished.

- If he's caught, Sol.

If he's not, that which originates from a

black deed will blossom in a foul manner.

- You're relying too heavily on the Bible.

- No, no, no.

Whether it's the Old Testament

or Shakespeare, murder will out.

- Who said anything about murder?

- You did.

Did I?

And I say,

if he can do it and get away with it

and he chooses

not to be bothered by the ethics,

then he's home free.

Remember,

history is written by the winners.

If the Nazis had won, future generations

would see World War II quite differently.

Your aunt is a brilliant woman, Judah,

but she's had a very unhappy life.

And if all your faith is wrong, Sol?

Just what if, huh? If?

I'll still have a better life

than all of those that doubt.

Wait a minute. Are you telling me

that you prefer God to the truth?

If necessary,

I will always choose God over truth.

I agree with him.

I say what goes around comes around.

- Are you OK?

- Yes.

- I was worried. It's late.

- I had some business.

- Mrs Ames is waiting.

- Any messages?

Yeah. An odd one.

A Detective O'Donnell called.

He wanted to talk to you about something.

I tried to get him to tell me what,

but he said he only wants to talk with you.

# He says "Murder", he says

# Every time we kiss,

he says "Murder", he says

# Keep it up like this

and then "Murder", he says

# In that impossible tone

# Will bring on

nobody's murder but his own

That was not such a great movie,

but it was fun.

Yeah, I liked it. I think maybe

when I'm older, I wanna be an actress.

Don't be an actress. I want you to be

on the Supreme Court, or a doctor.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American actor, comedian, filmmaker, and playwright, whose career spans more than six decades. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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