Critters Page #3

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and everything.

- Isn't that Johnny Steele?

- I don't know.

Whoa!

Joe, let's go.

Holy sh*t!

Wonder what team

he's on?

Hey, Jake, are we gonna get

a couple beers over here or what?

Keep your shirt on,

a**hole.

I got a problem here.

You believe these guys?

It ain't Halloween, is it?

If anything does happen to me,

you crooks won't live long.

What does he mean

we won't live long?

What can I get

for you fellas?

Reverend, what are

you doing here?

That's some outfit

you got on.

- We want the Crites.

- Oh really?

Who are they,

some new team?

The Crites.

Mister, I don't know

what you're talking about.

I think you all

better be leaving

before somebody

gets hurt.

You all have

a serious attitude problem.

Keep your shirt on,

a**hole.

This had better

be important.

Harv, you better get

down to the church,

- all hell is breaking loose.

- What?

The reverend says

a couple of guys started shooting...

Whoa, slow down.

...destroyed the organ,

you know how beautiful...

- Where's Jeff?

- I don't know.

I've been trying

to get him for hours.

Give me 10 minutes.

He looks pretty sick, Mom.

I'm okay, sport.

He's fine.

He doesn't look

fine to me.

Why don't you go

check the windows?

- I already did.

- Check them again!

It's okay, Mom.

I'm so sorry.

April?

Yeah?

You okay?

The flue's open!

Mom!

The shotgun!

Brad!

Brad, look out!

Hey, hey!

Hey, hey!

I've been looking

for you guys!

I just want to talk

to you.

- At first he was Jeff.

- Was it Jeff or wasn't it?

- He changed.

- Changed?

They were wearing

really funny clothes.

Like they was

from Los Angeles.

- Everybody calm down.

- Harv, all hell is breaking loose.

- Yeah, Sal. Over.

- There's been a disturbance

at the Bowlarama Lanes. Over.

What kind

of a disturbance? Over.

Well...

evidently some guys

shot up the bar.

You get a description?

Over.

Well...

it's kind of strange, Harv,

but Jake says

it was Reverend Miller

and Charlie

and some stranger.

Hold it, hold it,

hold it.

I'm not reading you

clear, Sal.

Repeat that. Over.

Reverend Miller,

Charlie McFadden

and some stranger

just shot up the bar

at the Bowlarama Lanes. Over.

Have you heard

from Jeff? Over.

I can't raise him, Harv.

I also got a report here

about shots fired

out Route 22...

near the Brown place. Over.

Harv, do you read? Over.

Sal, I want you to keep

trying to raise Jeff.

I'm headed over

to the bowling alley.

Then I'm going to head out

towards the Brown's place.

Over and out.

Over and out.

Get 'em, Harv!

Babe, I got to get to a phone,

get some help out here.

I can do it.

- Absolutely not.

- Dad, you can't even walk.

I'm so tired.

Damn.

Son...

assuming I said okay,

how would you do it?

Hit the yard, grab my bike

and head for the highway.

Dad, somebody's got

to go for help.

All right.

But boy, you ride like

you never rode before.

You get over to the Emmons' house

and get on the phone.

- Get Harv over here.

- Dad, I'll be fine.

Don't worry.

You want to take this?

Nah, you keep it.

It'd just slow me down.

Anyway, you might need it.

Brad?

See ya.

Oh my gosh.

They're growing!

How ya feeling, hon?

Like a brick hit me.

Oh, baby.

How long have I been...?

Where's Brad?

Brad has gone

to get help.

Oh, Jay, you shouldn't

have let him go.

Stop, stop!

Wait!

Go, just go.

These things... these critters.

Come on, go!

Dad's all torn up and Mom's got

a harpoon thing in her neck.

They're getting

bigger.

Let's go!

Charlie?

Where's Jeff?

Hey, you're Johnny Steele.

- Where?

- Huh?

Where are they?

At my house.

Come on, hit it.

Where?

Charlie, you know

where my house is.

Who are you guys?

We want the Crites.

The Crites?

Critters,

Crites.

You're not from

around here, are you?

Okay, okay.

You help me, I help you.

Stop it!

Goddamn it, stop it!

I got one.

Get out of my house!

Damn it!

Give me some more rounds.

That's it.

Oh, Jay.

Holy...

Mom? Dad?

Are you all right?

- Are you all right?

- Yeah.

Brad, who did you bring?

Charlie

and Johnny Steele.

- Who?

- Go on!

Help us!

Oh God, Chewie!

Help us!

Help us!

Oh, it's Harv.

Holy sh*t!

What is that, a cannon?

What's going on here?

Brad.

Where's Brad?

He's still in the house.

Helen, Helen!

Helen, Helen, Helen!

Get in the car.

Get in the car!

Get in there.

Get in.

Jay, get in the car.

Watch it!

Jeez, these folks could use

a good exterminator.

Charlie, what do you think

you're doing?

You drunk?

I hope not you'll

take over our operation.

Charlie, put me down.

Harv...

are you okay?

I swallowed

my chewing tobacco.

Chewie.

Here, Chewie.

Chewie.

Come here.

Chewie.

Where've you been?

I've been looking all over for you.

Come on.

We're going for a ride.

Brad, get down here!

Brad!

Help!

Thanks.

Oh, no.

April!

No, Helen, no!

No!

Where's April?

It just grabbed her.

I couldn't...

It was huge.

- Come on, Harv.

- They took her that way.

What was that thing?

Charlie?

Brad!

Brad!

No! You get him!

Get him!

- Charlie?

- Brad.

I was right.

I was right!

What are you doing here?

I'm just following

my teeth.

- I'm getting signals like crazy.

- Come on.

Where are we going?

- What the heck...

- Shhh!

Brad, is that April?

- Stay down, Brad.

- Stay here.

If I need you,

I'll holler.

Brad...

What's that thing

going to do with April?

- It's going to kill her.

- Oh, it's going to kill her.

Kill her?!

Bradley!

Let's go.

Brad!

April?

Give me your hand!

- I dropped my firecracker!

- Forget it!

But they'll get away!

- Charlie, let's go!

- Come on!

Brad, I got an idea.

Come here!

- Give me your fire.

- Brad!

Brad, come on!

Come on!

Throw it!

Dad!

- Mom, Dad!

- Are you okay?

Yeah, we're okay.

Hey!

I, uh...

just wanted, you know...

to say thanks.

Call me.

listen, you wouldn't

happen to have

another one of them

electronic gizmos

like you gave

to Brad there?

Listen, maybe you need

a good mechanic

to work

on them guns there.

I'm real good

with my hands...

Chewie!

Chewie?

Chew.

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